Breastfeeding to Sleep

I am going through the same thing with my 9 month old son. I feel like the letting him cry himself to sleep method doesn't work -- he just becomes hysterical! I want to see other moms' responses!

Hi S.:

Create a new sleeptime ritual. Aromatherapy, Flower Essences, singing songs, playing music...many options.

My best,
N.
Holistic Maternity Practitioner
www.WholeCreations.com

If it's what works for your family then why stop? I didn't breasfeed my children, but they have all been allowed to fall asleep in my arms while they were drinking their last night bottle, or a bottle at nap time. It never caused a problem for later on when there was no more bottle. At 10,8,3, and 2, they are all good sleepers now. So you shouldn't have anything to worry about if you keep things the way they are now.

Hi S., Unless you have a reason why you must stop why would you? I remember my nursing days and that was the best part. When the time comes for you to wean her then you will get her to sleep without the breast. Your child is dependant on you right now and that is OK. Grandma Mary

S.,

You are doing an awesome job - flying in the face of society! Bravo!

You are doing the best thing for your daughter: comfort, the best food, everything. There is no need to stop.

Contact La Leche League if you feel you need more information to back up what you are doing. Or email me. Or check with any of the positive answers you receive here.

Good luck, and congratulations, breastfeeding is best!
M.

Bf her in a diff room then bring hrr to her rm. Play a lullaby and give her a lovey..things she will soon associate w sleep other than milk. It may take time.

Do not wake her except to burp. Just feed her ewough so she's drowsy but not asleep.

Good luck!

I did this, too! I went back to work when my daughter was 14 months old, so I began weaning around then. I continued to nurse her to sleep until she gave up on that. Now we rock her (not to sleep, but to relaxed...) She just kind of decided on her own to sleep without it. When I weaned, I just did so during the day and nursed her in the morning and at night until she was about 21 months. Now she's 25 months.

Hi S.,

I wouldn't worry too much about this or actively try to stop it--it's such a lovely time in both your lives and it will end in it's own time. I think what you need to do are make sure there are other strong elements to the routine so that eventually the only thing that will change is the nursing to sleep. I always did three books, a song or two, and some sitting by the crib. That way, when someone else needed to nap my kids, or my husband would put them to bed, or I cut out the midday nursing, they still had all the cues in place and it wasn't so difficult. I know like it seems you have to do everything on a schedule and the mile markers are so important, but please listen to me (mother of 5, youngest now 3)and consider this: it will go too soon and you will miss the cuddly sessions--enjoy them, really be in the moment of them. Even if you have another, you will never have this type of uninterrupted time. If she goes down easy after feeding, and it lets you get some things done while she sleeps, appreciate that. Once in a while, let someone else put her to sleep so that the other parts of the routine take on importance for her.

I wouldn't wake a sleeping baby. If you feel that you must put her down awake, I'd change the time of last feeding - maybe swap a breastfeeding with dinner and let her have her last meal of solids before bed followed by a little milk in a cup. No matter when you choose to stop nursing your baby to sleep, it'll be an adjustment so doing it now isn't necessarily a benefit over doing it later on.

I nursed both kids until they were about 2 and always thought it was insane to wake my baby up when they fell asleep while nursing. The whole idea was to get them to sleep! Eventually they grew out of this (even while I was still nursing) and I've now got a 4-yr-old and 7-yr-old that have no problems going to sleep once I read a book and turn out the light.

Hi S.,
With weaning, I would suggest cutting out daytime feedings before cutting out sleepy time nursings. They are easier.

When you are ready to stop sleep time nursings, try the nap time first for a couple weeks, before you try night time.

I would not nurse her, wake her, then try to get her back to sleep again. This will only make it harder for her to understand. Just don't nurse her before nap time. Offer her a drink, warm milk or water, in a cuppy before nap time, then just tuck her into her bed/crib, regular routine, without offering to nurse her.

If she usually falls asleep while nursing, rock her, hold her close, with a cuppy, until she is tired enough to go to sleep on her own. This will probably take a couple days to get used to, so be patient.

When my children started to get into a real nap schedule (not just little cat naps throughout the day), I got them used to nursing/having a bottle after naps or well before naptime... and before bath/book, so it was not part of the sleep routine and they were learning other ways to soothe themselves to sleep. Just gradually try to change the time of feedings so it is not the last thing they do before sleep... don't nurse or feed in the bedroom anymore!! Good Luck!

I would just rouse her a little when she's done nursing. Give her a little wiggle and talk to her - like, "there you go honey"...something soothing but that wakes her. Then just put her in her crib. When she gets used to that, maybe you could add in a book after the nursing, and put her down after the book. Then, when she's weaned, you still have the book to signal bedtime. I had to do this with my kids, and though it was rough at first, within a few days we had it worked out. Good luck!

I tried to stop nursing my first son to sleep by six months or so and he did okay with it (with some exceptions, like a rough night or not feeling well). You can try making sure she is well-nursed when you are sitting somewhere other than the room she sleeps in, the move her and if she wakes up, let her settle herself.

With my current little guy (11 months now) I still nurse him to sleep. If he's tired and not sleeping, he'll stop nursing and indicate he wants to go sleep on his own. Otherwise, I decided he is still a baby and he seems to really benefit from that extra cuddling and nursing and napping and I'm going to keep doing it. He does sometimes wake up after I put him down and I let him cry himself back to sleep. He has no attachment problems (he likes everyone and is not clingy at all). Do what you are comfortable doing. I learned that we are too worried about our children being "too attached" to us rather than letting our "snuggle baby!" instincts take over as they should. Good luck! :)

S.,

I agree this isn't a big deal unless you are frustrated by it. If you want to stop this so you can have some freedom to have someone else put your daughter to sleep here are my recommendations.

try feeding your daughter earlier - look for her sleep cues and and start sooner. If she doesn't fall asleep nursing then spend some time reading/singing/rocking before putting her down. Sometimes I would give my drowsy, just nursed baby to my husband and have him rock him to sleep so it wasn't always me. Eventually I started putting my son down and allowing him to cry for 5-7 min then going in and patting him. Now I can put him down and rub his back for a few minutes and he is done.

Keep doing what feels best for you - each child is different but don't allow yourself to feel trapped by a routine that isn't working. Try a few things and you will see what works best for you.

Good Luck!
C.

I wouldn't worry about it. They tend to outgrow this need eventually. She's also still pretty young. I don't know how you'd wake a baby, then get her back to sleep. Just enjoy the fact that it's so easy to get her to drift off at this point--the payoff is, you are creating positive sleep associations. So even when she stops needing it to fall asleep, she should be easier to put down, and a better sleeper in the long run.

I also found it to be true that, if you add something else in to the ritual, it makes it easier in the long run. I read a few stories to my son and sang a song or two (always the same song just before putting him down). You can sing while you nurse, whatever. The point is, once she no longer nurses to sleep, or when you start to transition to that point, she will have the other parts of the routine to rely on and associate with sleep.