Help in Daytime Nap Schedule

First of all, you need to not be anxious or feel guilty- with those feeling it will never work. You need to cut back on the amount of breast feeding in my opinion. She should be eating more solid foods at this point and transition to a cup. Lay with her without breast feeding; Kids should not need the breast to sleep and if that is the case with your daughter, you need to start there before worrying about where she is sleeping. She also should be sleeping though the night, at 13 month old does not need to feed in the night- she should be getting enough food during the day to sustain her through the night. It is just for comfort- so start cutting back on the feeding and then worry about where she needs to sleep.

I nursed my 2nd daughter until she was 13 months and like you the nap and night time nursings were the last to go. I did it one at a time to kinda ease into it. So first I cut out the night time feedings. I used to do bath, story, song, nurse and bed. So when I weaned I just cut out the nursing. She didn't even cry. Weird right? But then she did wake up a few times in the night and when I didn't come to get her she cried but it was only for about 10 or 15 minutes and that only lasted for about 2 nights. Then for the naps I always did 2 books, song, nurse and bed. So again I just kept that same routine but didn't nurse her and she just went to sleep. For you where she is not used to even sleeping in her crib I would first continue to nurse her to sleep and then put her in her room in her crib. Let her get used to that first then start taking out the nursing. Also when I did it I got the Fisher Price music/light up crib toy. They have a few different ones like an under the sea or rainforst theme. They are so soothing and hypnotic. When i put her in her crib and turn that on she just stares at it until she falls asleep.

I would recommend putting her in her crib in her own room right away. It will be easier for her to get used to one big change than to have to deal with two. I know two great books on sleeping. The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley and Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Dr. Ferber. Ferber is the compassionate, controlled crying technique. It was the only thing that worked for my daughter. Whatever routine you decide on, be consistent. Reverting back to the old patterns will only make it harder for her. Good luck!

Its kind of strange, I am also cosleeping and nursing all night and I've wondered some of the same things. Dh wishes ds would sleep in his own bed but because I have a shaky milk supply, I have to nurse at night. But I can help with naps.

I read the book "healthy sleep habits, happy child" and used its principles to nap train. I used the cry it out method but only for one hour max. I would go ahead and nurse before putting her down in case she cries for an hour, then falls asleep for two hours. My routine was this: 10 minutes of singing while holding standing up and kind of swaying side to side. Then I would put him down and tuck him in. Sometimes he would go to sleep before I put him down, sometimes not. Either way, once the ten minutes was up, he went down. After weeks, I slowly backed down the ten minutes to where now its a little song and then he goes right down and puts himself to sleep. It takes time and persistence. But its important for your lo to learn to put herself to sleep. Doing this will allow her to begin learning that.

And do go ahead and put her in her room. Otherwise its just another transition you will have to go through later. Its much better to let her get accustomed to her crib during naps before trying to do nighttime.

Nursing two to three times in the night is a habit at 13 months old, and excessive. I have a five month old, last nursing is at 9 at night, first nursing is at 6-6:30 AM. You have to train them to sleep, crying it out lasts for about 3 or 4 days, if that. Getting up that many times in the night is exhausting for you, put her down for a nap in her own room, she will cry but eventually she will go to sleep. Having a scheduled nap or two during the day, also helps them sleep at night.

This isn't meant to come across as rude. I'm wondering why at 13 months you are nursing 2-3 x a night!!! That is excessive to say the least. She is well beyond the age of a child who is sleeping through the entire night.

If you don't like CIO method, try something new, and get her interested in something in her own bedroom. A sound machine, or music player with very soft music may distract the anxiety she's having. You could read a book, lay on the floor with her, teach her how to turn the sound machine on and pick a sound that she likes, and put her in the bed and walk out. In 3-4 days the crying will lessen if you continue to do the same routine every single day.

There is no magic age of when to stop nursing your daughter. If you are not ready to stop, then don't. Nursing has so many benefits for you and her.

I nursed my son until he was 2. I know some people might think that is strange, but it worked for us. The World Health Organization recommends to nurse to at least 2 years and the AAP recommends to nurse to at least a year and as long as the mother and child want to continue after that.

I would say continue to nurse her before naps/bed. Nursing usually knocked my son out, so I would nurse him and place him in his crib. No fussing/crying for us.

Night time feedings are the hardest to cut out. I started to phase them out for my son a little after the year mark. I made sure before I cut out the night time feedings that he was eating plenty of solids. I also let him nurse as much as he wanted before he went to bed (cluster nursing). When he woke at night, I patted him, rocked him and offered him sips of water. It took awhile for this to work but eventually he slept through without needing/wanting a feeding.

Around 13 months they go through a huge growth spurt, so it is common for breastfed babies to wake up at night around this age even if they slept through before.

Here are a few links that I referred to when I needed answers.
http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/index.html
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp
http://www.llli.org/nb.html

Good luck to you and your daughter! You are doing a great job momma!

I would start with the naps. Rather than laying with her, sit with her while you nurse her in her room. Then when she is drowsy, lay her in her crib. It will take a few days, but by not laying down to nurse her, it will make it easier. Until she has naptime down, the only changes I would make at night would be to nurse her while sitting up, and then lay her down where she normally sleeps. I nursed my son until he was 2, and like your daughter, he wouldn't sleep longer than 3-4 hours until he was about 17 months, although I only nursed him once during the night. Another thing to try is don't offer her the breast right away when she wakes in the night. It's really easy in the night to just lay down, offer your breast, and go back to sleep while the baby nurses, but at this point, it's mostly habit, not hunger. Good luck!

I nursed my eldest for 17 months, and my baby is still nursing at 11 months. Both were sleeping through the night by ten months.

There is no reason nursing can't be part of your routine. Nurse until the point of drowsiness, and then brush teeth while baby is drowsy. (If baby is still alert, make something fun but bedtime related part of the routine - both of my daughters think it's fun when daddy lifts them up to turn the light off themselves. The four-year old gets a bit of a swing in the lift, but it's still lights-out time.) Then kiss, hug, tuck-in, goodnight.

When my oldest started showing signs of wanting to wean, I started reading books out loud to her while she nursed in the evening. We sort of transitioned from nursing to storytime slowly that way.

I've heard a lot of people seem to use the cio method as just leaving the child to cry. We never did that - we did do Ferber, though. Check out Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Ferber. It takes three days of consistency - use the same routine for naps and bedtime.

Just offer water at night. I'd try cutting out one nighttime feeding at a time, though, and not all of them at once.

If bottles are a problem, go out somewhere this weekend, and let Daddy give the bottle with breastmilk. She won't take a bottle from you - you've got the source, why should she?, but she might take it from Daddy.

Once the bottle is familiar, then introduce it with water. We had to do this with my oldest - she just needed to realize that bottles contained edible stuff.

And I'd definately try naptime in the crib before bedtime. Let her experience the crib - play in there, put a music box in there - we have a mobile by TinyLove where the mobile part detaches and the base becomes a simple to use music box. There were many times when both children haven't napped during the allotted naptime, and played a little instead, but some quiet recharge time is still valuable.

Having said that, every family is unique - you'll figure out what works best for you. Hang in there, mama!

Hello R.. I understand where you are coming from. My son who is now a year old used to sleep with me and my husband. I was very anxious about moving him to his own crib, but knew I had to because he was waking up a lot throughout the night and neither of us were getting our best sleep. I have to admit that the transition was harder on me then it was on him. We just did it one evening and he cried for a short while, but was fine after that. I always nurse him first in the chair by his crib in his room and he falls asleep while nursing in my lap. Then I transition him to the crib and he is fine. For the last few months, he woke up about 2 times through the night, but now he sleeps through the night. I still nurse and naps and at bedtime. He takes one nap during the day - goes down around 12 and sleeps for about 3 hours. Good luck with everything.

i never breastfed but my bfs aunt does with her almost 2 yr old son and she does at night and at naps , i think not 100% sure, and i think if you are wanting her to sleep in her own bed then it needs to be stopped cold turkey, maybe give her a snack of cereal or something before bed and a sippy of milk, and lay her in her crib for naps and bed time right off the bat bc it will just confuse her, n let her cry for 10-15 minutes go in sooth her and calm her down and go right back out

Babies have to be taught how to sleep! Of course she is going to cry and get herself worked up because she has no idea why she's in that room and in that crib thing. This will have to be a gradual transition and one that won't happen overnight. Where does she nap now? Do you lay down to nap with her? If so it is going to take serious time to teach her how to sleep on her own. And no you do not need or want to use any form or cry it out/Ferber method. If you've been co-sleeping all this time those are not the methods for you. Check out Dr. Sears. He has valuable info on sleep that is kinder and gentler. I also gleaned a lot of useful info from The Baby Whisperer. I don't agree with everything but I took what I could use to come up with a good routine for my family.

You need to establish a routine that she can learn to depend on and know what to expect and what is expected. I would start by telling her whatever you tell her now at nap time. Like with my kids when they started showing signs of needing a nap I would tell them "time for a tiny" and pick them up, go to their room, turn down the lights, turn on the music and hold them till they fell asleep. Then while holding them close (to help prevent that falling feeling)I would lay them down. You can nurse her to sleep but if you don't that saves you from having to give that up when you are trying to wean her down the road. I just weaned my 22 month old and I'm so glad that we extended her nursing past 1 just like with my son!

Dear R.,

The first thing that I would work on is the night time 2-3x routine feedings. Take the next few months to ween her off gradually, 2...then 1...then none. At this age she should be able to sleep atleast 6 hours without needing to feed at night. I'm not much for the "crying" it out method either, and my daughter slept with us till she was 2 before transitioning her to her bed....by then she wasn't nursing at night. Begin a soothing back to sleep routine, instead of a feeding routine. It will take a few months. We bought my daughter a "big girl" bed ( full size w/ rails) and one of us would lay down with her till she fell asleep. It made it easy for her because she was accustomed to having us there, and eventually she got used to her own bed. Good luck.