I get that way with my hubby and it's usually when I start feeling overwhelmed and needing help.
I suggest you and the boyfriend sit down and talk about chores. I took a list of everything I could think of that I do and a time table as to when they need to be done, for example, washing the curtains is a once a year thing compared to dishes being daily.
The list was pages and pages long with everything from cleaning the carpets to scrubbing walls with crayon to changing the sheets and washing, drying, and remaking the bed. He was shocked at all the stuff I listed.
I think that everyone in the household need to participate in making the home a happy, healthy environment to live in. Whether they have a full time job outside the home or not.
Guys tend to do yard work and out door stuff and we girls end up stuck in the house cooking and doing dishes. It's not fair and resentment builds up and boils over when it gets to be too much. He has to take responsibility for some chores to help you out.
My hubby does the dishes and takes out the trash. if he doesn't do it the way I want then I have to back off, it's his job, not mine. I have to let him learn how to manage it and let him make mistakes. If the dishes don't get done then we just work around it. That is the only way it works. He eventually learned to do the dishes as needed.
If you constantly bug him about the chores he is responsible for then it only makes the stress worse. If you get fed up with how he does them and take over doing it for him you have defeated your purpose. Let him pick 3 big chores like picking up the stuff in the kids rooms, vacuuming the whole house once a week, cleaning the kitchen after dinner, cleaning the bathrooms, something that is time consuming and hard for you to do. It is only fair that he help out even if you are not working outside of the home at some time in the future.