Anixety over Another Pregnancy

Updated on April 10, 2008
D.J. asks from Amarillo, TX
8 answers

I had a very normal first pregnancy, and delivered a healthy boy. He is now four, and I know that now is the time if we want another one. I don't know why, but the whole idea of another pregnancy makes me extremely nervous. Part of the reason is that I developed hypothyroidism and had to have my gallbladder out within a year after delivery. I am fine now and completely healthy, but things were a little rough for a while. On top of that, my son was a very collicy, sickly, high maintenance baby who did not sleep well. The first year was rough all around. Also, I know a girl who recently died in childbirth and another who lost a baby, so that has added to my anxiety. I really do want another child and have no real reason to be this nervous, but I am. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you handle the stress? Thanks for the advice.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter was very colicy and had reflux. I never thought I would make it through the first couple of months. But we do:). I was very scared to have another baby. I love my daughter so much, but she was a very hard baby to care for. I finally decided that God would not do that to you twice and I was right. We got pregnant again when she was 10 months old. We had a wonderful baby boy who was totally different. He was very easy going, slept through the night at 6 weeks. He only fussed when he was hungry, dirty or needed to burp. It has been so eay with him we have thought about having another, but soon decided we didn't want to push our luck. Just remember God will never give you more than you can handle and each child is different. Try not to let the fear keep you from trying again. They are such a wonderful blessing and you can handle whatever is in store for you.

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D.A.

answers from Dallas on

Julie S is right...pray about it and give it to God. I have a daughter who is now 4. I also have a step-son now 9. I really wanted another child since my step-son is only here every other week. But it was not in God's plan for me to have another.

I am so blessed by my daughter and step-son...they are my pride and joy! Don't worry about what's happened to others...God has a plan specifically for you! Relax and enjoy your life.
God Bless!

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W.P.

answers from Dallas on

My boys are almost exactly four years apart. My oldest loved helping with the baby. Bringing me diapers and stuff like that. Now he helps teach him things. Yes I admit he teaches him things I rather neither of them know, but they are boys. They are also completely different in so many ways. I won't say if you had one fussy baby the next won't be, but if it is you know tricks of the trade to get through it! I have always felt the best thing you can give your child is a sibling. How many is a personal choice.

As far as the anxiety over the pregnancy, all I can say is relax. Talk to your doctor every step of the way. I'm sure they have had other expectant mom's with the same amount of concerns. Make them earn every penny if need be. A good doctor will understand and be willing to hold your hand if thats what it takes.

If you are still still too scared then maybe a counselor could help. There is nothing wrong with talking to a professional. Medical or spiritual is up to you. They could both help in different ways. Adoption is always a possibility too. I believe the child that is meant to be yours will come to you when it is time. Just relax and let it happen.

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C.S.

answers from Amarillo on

I am 35 weeks pregnant with my third baby--and I am the same way!! I can't tell you why, but I have this terrible fear that her cord is wrapped around her neck or something like that. I even had a routine sono last week that measured the blood in her cord and it was perfect, but I am SO paranoid. I think as we experience more in life (like death of babies, moms in childbirth, etc) we realize things can happen. All we can do is take the best care of ourself as we possibly can. Good Luck with your pregnancy and just hang in there. :) C.

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

Pray about it. Give it to God. Afterall, he is the one who knows his plans for you. Every pregnancy and child is different, just because your first child had some difficulties does not mean your second will have those same issues or any at all.

Give yourself time and give it to God. He knows what is best for you.

Blessings,

J.

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

I am experiencing many of the same issues. My boy is four and I know we need to get this show on the road if our kids are really going to get to grow up together. My fears are more in the area of being there for everybody and juggling it all. The idea of taking on the pregnancy with my four year old to take care of and all is frightening. I was so sick at the beginning of my last pregnancy, I can only imagine how hard all of that will be. So, you tell me that I can do it all and work all day long, and I'll encourage you with this...Nothing will happen that is out of God's control. Give your next pregnancy totally over to Him, and you know that nothing can happen that He can't make the best of.

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E.F.

answers from Amarillo on

My first pregnancy was a learning adventure. I was sick the first 5 months and scared. My daughter was an easy baby, she ate and slept well, was never realy fussy and smiled a bunch. On her first b-day I found out I was pregnant again, the pregnancy was a breeze. I didnt get sick at all and was full of energy. My son was the oppisite he was up every couple hours and ate little, fussy to no end and then he started gettin about and now he never slows down. I thought I was done and then yet again I was prego. I was so sick, I lost weight, couldnt eat, passing out, it was very hard on me. My seconed daughter, she fussed and slept and I cant not smile when I look at her. She is so determined. And yet again when she was 9m I was prego again. I was terrified. I still wasnt well from my last pregnancy, my body and mind were just drained. The pregnancy went great. I was never sick, gained weight, tired alot but hey it was number 4. And my son is healthy eats like a horse and sleeps well, always happy. Every pregnancy and every child is different. Mine are now 9,7,2,6m. We take every day as it comes and our thankful to make it to the next.

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H.P.

answers from Dallas on

I'm in the same position. I would love to have 4 childern; I have 2 beautiful daughters, ages 7 & 6. Pregnancy was a bit difficult due to severe anemia and other complications with my first daughter, who was born a month early and less than 5lbs. And even though it took about a year to recover from those 2 pregnancies and c-sections, it was obviously all worth it to be "blessed" with 2 such wonderful daughters who make every single day more bright and special. I had planned to have had another by now, but there is a fear about getting pregnant again that I just can't get over. Now I fear that I waited too long. They are finally in school; I can finally teach daytime classes, etc. But, everytime I see a baby, my heart drops. I just don't know what to do. If you get some good advice, please pass it on to me! Thanks.

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