An Issue Every Parent Meets

I just try to accept that all other parents are not like "us" and variety IS the spice of life. I seriously think you can find common ground with just about anybody.

well, i feel at my sons school (which is a christian school inside our church) i am the odd parent out. I have tried this year to be more involved and to talk more with parents. I am one of the younger moms, i am tattooed and pierced and many have said i never looked approachable. i am fine with the comments. My oldest was in a 4 yr class last year there were 12 students. mainly boys. he was the only boy that didnt do a playdate with any of the other boys. the one playdate i did try to set up was shot down. I dont take any of it to heart because if i did, i would be worried it would bring my b down. this year he is in kindergarten. its been better. i have made myself more assertive in the right ways. my kiddo has been to birthday parties and three or four playdates!!! i think giving the odd parents a little bit of a chance you may see them differently. I am not a socially awkward person. i am just shy. so sometimes when i am around other parents i am nevuos. i dont critizes you for asking this question. i think its ok. we are all different people with different personalities. we arent all meant to get along or understand each other. dont say anything to your kiddo about it though. i only think it is fair for you to let your child draw there own feelings about the friends parents. this could end up being a life long friend.

just another mama
-libby

I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason so give her a try maybe you need someone odd like her in your life to loosen you up or maybe she needs someone like you in hers to give her balance. Nobody says you have to become Best Friends but open up your world a bit and you might just get a huge dose of something fun and new. Chances are if you don't have common ground you will gravitate toward others more anyway. Maybe schedule a park play date and have you both invite another friend with kids and take cheese and crackers maybe some wine and turn the play date into a Mommy play date too. Have fun.

My neighbor and I were never really friends because we just honestly have nothing in common. I love being outdoors but she is more of a home body.

She became pregnant 3 months after me and we both had boys.

For awhile our boys were not playmates because we were always out and about, and they rarely ever came out of their house.

One day she knocked on our door, our boys were now 3, asking if they could play. After I got over the shock of her actually coming outside (LOL) I was happy to let the boys play.

Talking to her was like pulling teeth! The boys got along famously though.

I’m telling you I even tried telling some jokes and she barely cracked a smile. All I kept thinking is this is not someone I could ever be friends with!

I’m very outgoing, positive and get along with pretty much everyone. She is the complete opposite.

Nonetheless, our boys still play every once in awhile, but her and I just don’t engage in conversation. What I do is just focus more on engaging with the kids = playing hide & seek, tag, simon says, sports, etc. She just stands on the sidelines and watches.

Yup.. every parent gets this one! Try to do an activity that involves everyone ~ like a fair. The kids are playing but you have other things to talk about rather than just talking to the parents. You've had a great day - the kids were together and you didn't have to discuss a thing!! : ) Then do your best to keep them apart until another "event" comes to town!! We have some odd folks.... I find Sweet Tea Vodka works best when spending time with them!
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I can sit and have coffee and make small talk for an hour with someone I don't have much in common with for the sake of my kid.

If all else fails, my common ground is we both have daughters the same age. lol that's my go to if the conversation is lacking.

Interesting...and timely...my son has a friend that he met in his K class. The mom had us over and really other than our boys being friends this is not someone that I will be friends with though we both tried. We were doing a weekly play date switching whose house it was at...until the holidays since then my son and her son have requested another one. I am interested though only if a drop off situation so I'd like to change the dynamic, which I plan on doing soon. We've been busy with sports and other life events so I have not broached the idea with her. And there are a bunch of K boys in our neighborhood so it is convenient. She is also in the process of moving within the city.

I'm very laid back on that kind of stuff. You don't have to be best friends where you share everything and hang out 5 days a week or anything. Just whatever feels natural. But yeah I totally would bite the bullet for a playdate. I've let my son play with a kid, and the mom was a lady that I didn't think we'd ever find anything in common or be friends, and we have so much fun together! We have parties and backyard BBQs back and forth at each others homes often. I've also had playdates with other moms where we can chat politely (if nothing else than about school, lessons or how to teach something, the kids in general) but had nothing in common. But it was good to watch my son interact and see how he plays with other children his age....and good to get to know the children he likes. Later, this could come in handy because you want to be able to know how a parent thinks and how they are when your children start asking to sleep over somewhere. There are some parents that I just flat wouldn't trust. There are others that I wouldn't think twice about, even if we're not friends, because I know they'd do good at chaperoning or whatever.

I would limit friendship to where the kids were involved if you felt no additional friendship vibes with them. Be friendly, but don't invite them to dinner if you don't feel that way.

The flip side can be that the adults are friends and the kids are not. We had that happen with our older kids. The kids (all) got older and our kids just didn't want to hang out anymore. We let it fade naturally.

I'd also carve out family time so that the kids aren't ALWAYS doing a playdate and get sick of each other.