Almost 3-Year Old Won't Go to Sleep at Night

This is much easier said than done, but the one thing that always worked for me w/my daughter was to have a serious heart to heart. Sometimes I could get her to explain why she was having a hard time sleeping in her bed (or whatever the issue at the time would be) and just talking about things that might help and treating them like another person, and not a baby might help (not to say that you're treating him like a baby:) I think it's going to depend on the child, and how he best communicates, or who he feels most comfortable talking to, but it could be something as simple as a change in bedding, or an added special pillow, or maybe there is something in his room that frightens him in the dark. Hopefully it starts to get easier soon, you guys sound like you need your rest!

Well, you say you won't consider it, but I did eventually have to put a gate up in my daughter's door. It wasn't so much to lock her in, for convenience purposes, but to keep her safe (wandering about in the middle of the night, getting into things she shouldn't, etc - if I was asleep in my room and she got out of hers, she rarely came to my room...she wanted to EXPLORE!!!). I know it *seems* cruel at first thought, but you really are doing it for their safety.
Plus, after a while she got used to playing quietly in her room if she wasn't ready to sleep, therefore teaching her the new skill of playing well on her own. And trust me, that comes in REALLY handy when mommy is busy (like with the new baby!). Although, there were a few nights that she fell asleep playing with her toys and we had to put her back to bed!
Anyway, just something to think about!
Good luck!!

Hi, I am a 63 year old mother of 3, grandmother of 3. I work with children of elementary school age and am around moms and dads with children of all ages. As a parent, the bedtime thing can be taxing. I successfully got my children into quite time/to sleep by allowing them to read their stories and I also had stories on tape they could listen to before falling asleep. I call the reluctance to go to bed "Resisting A Rest!".
As a working mom, due to give birth to your next child, I know how exhausted you must be trying to get this routine in place. You did not try the "big boy bed" too early and you are not experiencing anything any of us have not also experienced. You may find your "big boy" regressing considerable due to your new baby arrival. This is also normal. Your boy sounds like he is truly a kid, and that is awesome.
Don't wear yourselves out. You and your husband deserve to kick back and enjoy your boy, your coming boy and each other. Keep experiementing with ways to get your little buddy to sleep and don't stress too much.
It is a child's job to test every boundary anyone ever puts forth for them and it is a job they always do well. Your boy is going to get that you arent' giving in to his demands, his silliness about bed time, you just have to hang in there until he knows you mean business and no deviations are going to let him get his way.
Good luck, and have a joyous time with your darlings.

That's a tough one. We transitioned our 3 yr old to a big boy bed when he was "almost" 3 because I was pregnant and couldn't get him in and out of his crib anymore. It was tough at first to get him moved, but we used a reward chart and after a week everything worked out. That being said, it sounds to me like this whole fiasco is a way for him to get attention. I would suggest that instead of accompanying him back to his room when he gets up, you just instruct him to go back to bed and don't go with him. Be consistent and keep telling him to go to back to bed every single time he gets up and he'll stop.

Well, I know it sounds terrible what I am advising but it worked for my daughter who is three. Hailey would get in her bed and as soon as the lights went off she was out her door. Well, each night my husband and I sit on our front porch and at night there are a lot of earwig bugs on our step and our daughter HATES them. She wont go near them...........so a friend of mine suggested we use her "fear of bugs" to make her stay in bed. Well, we tried it one night. We put her in bed, lights went out, Hailey got out of bed and off she went. SOOO I first gave her a warning that if she got out of bed again she was going outside and was going to SLEEP with the bugs. She just thought that was funny....so I put her back in HER BED, turned off the lights got back in my bed....she of course got up and left the room. I got up not saying one word, grabbed her by her arm and opened the front door and said ok you dont want to go to sleep then you go sleep with the BUGS!!! That is all it took, she started screaming and crying saying no i want to go to bed!!! I will sleep! So I said fine then you go get in your bed and you go to sleep!!! That was 7 months ago......she now goes to bed every night when she is told and STAYS there! I know it sounds mean to scare her like that but its all that worked. So find out what your son is afraid of and use that. It may just work! GOOD LUCK!! If not try a baby gate, I would use that for his safety anyways!! :)

I know exactly what you are going through. I had to switch my 1 year old to a big bed because she kept climbing out of her crib and I thought she would break her neck. It has been difficult (she just turned 3) to get her to stay in her room or do anything I want her to for that matter. She pushes my buttons every chance she gets. because she is a climber I could not keep her contained with baby gates. The only thing that has worked is to lock her door. She does not cry or have a problem with it. She just has a really hard time setting her boundaries and she is like a bird with the cage left open. If theres a window of opportunity she will take it. Anyway I struggled for a long time before going with this route. I only lock the door when she goes to bed and I check on her periodically and when she is asleep I unlock the door. That way if she wakes up she can come get me or god forbid if there is an emergency then there is not a problem getting out. I heard someone else on here say that they put a baby door knob lock on the inside of the room. That way you control the door but they are not necessary locked in. I feel for you.

Good luck, I hope something works for you.

Hello J.,
I also have a son that is 3 years old and is going thru the same issues.
I felt like I was reading a post from myself when I was reading yours.
We have also transitioned our son into a big boy bed in the last 6 months or so and have had issues with him getting out of bed and wanting to play.
We just kept taking him into bed and putting him in there and saying it was time to go to sleep now. We used soft music, dim lighting and books of course before going to sleep. Routine is good for them I feel and after a few weeks he was going right along with the program!! I know where you are and how you feel, in time it shall pass if you are consistent with the routine. They eventually give up and go to sleep. Good luck and if you are up in the middle of the night, feel free to email me - I am also up and down with my son still, so I know how you are feeling Exactly!! Take care, and I am sure you will find some great advice on this website, as we are all going through alot of the same issues with our special, most lovely children.
K.