And has lost long time friends.......
I just don't know what to do.
Please tell me you have read a great book on how to deal with people like this.
She is 40, so she is not going to grow out of it.
I swear she needs an intervention.
Not only has her 2 besties dropped her from their lives COMPLETLY
Her own brother won't even have anything to do with her because of her lies........
And her mom never answers when she calls, she HAS to leave a voicemail first.
Talking to her is like going to battle, everything seems to be an argument, a "put-down fest" of others or you end up having to defend yourself for some reason or another!!!
sigh..........
Please, there HAS to be a book I can read to help with this!!
You nailed it.!
Thanks!
Wow, this sounds like my dad and I don't deal with him anymore. I have limited contact with him and I screen my calls.
Here's a book that helped me that you also might find helpful in the work place as well :) The title says it all!
Dealing With People You Can't Stand
http://www.amazon.com/Dealing-People-Can-2019t-Revised-Ex...
MFM
Codependent No More by Melody Beattie.
You can't make other people change but you CAN change your own behavior when dealing with other people.
Updated
Google Borderline personality disorder and see if she fits...
If I didn't know better I'd say this is my narcissitic mom (she's 79)...It's called therapy ...not for her but for you....
http://bnarcissisticabuserecovery.runboard.com/
Try this website and see if it fits. The articles along the lower left are especially helpful.
Your description of this person sounds like someone I know who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. If this is her problem, you're right, she isn't going to grow out of it. Whatever your relationships to her, the best thing to do is to take care of yourself.
Doesn't sound like you're the one that needs to read the book. And I'm sure if she read it, she would only see the problems that everyone ELSE has....
I think you answered the question yourself when you said that she needs an intervention. Why not be the one to organize it?
You might try 'Trapped in the Mirror', a book for people who deal with family members who suffer from clinical narcissism. I don't know if that is this person's diagnosis (or if they are just a PITA), but I found this book helpful and informative.
Um, yeah. Book- Quit Walking On Egg Shells.
Website- BPDfamily.com
You can look on the site and look at the symptoms and decide for yourself.
They have great lessons and tools for comunication.
They have a board to talk to others in this situation, but it's pretty bleak.
My guess is that she has Borderline Personality Disorder. I don't have a degree to diagnose but I have a degree in Hard Knocks from the last two yrs with my mil. So far she has alienated all 3 of her kids, most of her siblings won't even talk to her. We still hear of her lies to anyone that will listen to her. When we first started, we had no clue. I kept searching just like you to find an answer. This fit her to a T. I will never let anyone else go without an answer. By the way, ANYTHING they do to you they feel justified. That makes them dangerous. Most people end up with LC or NC, low contact or no contact. There is little hope for a cure. Never tell her that she has this. I am sorry you are going through this. It has been devastating for my H's family. But knowing what it is has been so helpful.
Good Luck.
