You are all right; it's okay. Children learn at their own pace, and they DO eventually learn to use the toilet without using their clothes first. My first two boys were 3 before they would stay dry, my next, a girl, is 4 and still only staying dry when she wants to (in public but wets her clothes at home), and my 4th is only 18 months and will occasionally use his potty. Of course, at 18 months he can take off his own diaper, and does when it gets wet. All the others could by his age too, and by about 2 or so we just give up on the diapers and put them in regular clothes and let them change their clothes themselves when they get wet. I just do the laundry :) Our daughter has been changing her own diapers since she was 2, and it is mostly just a choice for them to make. Some days she prefers to have dry clothes, so she keeps them dry and uses the toilet. Others, well... it's her choice. But, she is beginning to understand, after repeated explaining, that her diaper rashes only come when she won't either change her clothes or keep them dry in the first place. I simply tell her to stay dry and go wash when they get to be too uncomfortable. She is learning much, and it isn't because I am being lazy. Sometimes, experience is the best teacher. Eventually, through experience, they realize that staying clean and dry is just a LOT more convenient than the other choices they could make.
Good luck! :)