3 Year Old Daughter Being Mean ! =(

Hi, Relax. This is just a little jealousy or attitude. When someone says don't do that, she just has to do it! At this stage she is probably feeling a bit left out. The baby takes up more of your time. People come over to see the baby. It used to be all about her. Now she's sharing the spotlight. Punishing her just makes her resent the baby even more. Now he makes her get punished. It's all his fault. She really doesn't get that she's being aggessive. I know that you have no choice to but to do a time out after these incidents but make sure she knows the reason for it. Explain it over and over. Include her when you change the baby. Let her rub lotion on his hand and then praise her to the heavens for it. Let her help hold the bottle and do the same thing. When she understands that she gets a great reaction for good stuff she'll ease off on the other stuff.

Make sure to set time aside for just you and her. She had it before and she probably wants it again.

I sympathize with you. I also live on Staten Island. I have four children 23 son, 20 son, 16 son (autistic) and a 12 year old girl. My husband works constantly. When they were young there were some days I felt abandoned, lonly and overworked. Most of the time I realized that I liked being the only authority in the house. Get out as often as you can. Even if you just walk around the block. Go get some ice cream.

You're doing a great job. Take care of you just as much as you take care of them. It's all a circle. If you feel good then they react better. If they react better then you feel good.

Good luck.

it sounds like she might be jealous. she is the oldest. she just just trying to get your attention. she was the only child until you had your son. maybe you should try that mom and daughter time when your son takes a nap.

Your daughter is having a natural and healthy reaction to having her life completely disrupted and to make matters worse she must share HER mom. I went through the same thing and there is nothing worse for a mom to see her baby hurt by her other child. Do things just for her, if your husband can do anything to make her feel special it would help, maybe on the weekends he can take her and only her somewhere. Really stress that she is the only one who gets to go etc.

G.

not a mother of two but a sibling of 7 i can tell you it is a lash out of telling her what to do around the new addition when freedom was hers for 3 years psychology helps: just say to the baby ocasionally oh don't do that that is sister's or we don't touch that because that is sister's. the baby doesn't understand what you are adressing but your daughter will see that you are giving paramaters to the "new commer" and not just her. when a child is given paramaters on a new baby it results in revenge like behavior but when the baby is given paramaters as well it does not come across as favoritism of the new commer.