22 Month Old Not Interacting at Daycare

I think he is fine. At 22 months they "parallel play" - they don't really interact.

You can ask specific follow up questions "I'm glad he appeared to be having fun - which toy does he seem to play with the most?" Or "I'm glad he had a great day, what activity did he have the most fun?" That will give you an idea if they are really paying attention.

Sometimes, though, with a toddler "having a great day" and "having fun with his friends" ARE "canned" answers and it's code for "he didnt' bite or get bit. he didn't have a poop accident so bad that we had to change 3 other kids clothes and wash his hair and nothing fell on top of him that left a mark".

But take heart.... he is learning a TON by being exposed to other care givers and other kids that are at his same age.

It's also good to be mama bear. Definitely meet with the teachers and get their input.

Kids this age, do what is called "parallel play."
They do not yet, fully "interact" and play with others.
And at this age they do not have "friends" like how we adults would think of it. Kids this age do not have BFF's.
They don't even have social skills yet nor full communication ability. Their emotions are not even fully developed yet.

He is normal.

It's my understanding that this is developmentally normal. Kids at this age parallel play - they're too young to really play together much.

As someone who has been a lead teacher in toddler room:

Everyone below is correct. We often see more parallel play at this age. Some children may look like they are 'playing with' others, but it's usually a shared interest that they are gathered around, such as a sand table or cars or blocks. It will take a while before kids this age learn to take turns (the first step in 'sharing') and navigate the social work of group play.

It's also worthwhile to rethink the idea of what 'fun' looks like. For younger children, play is their work. My son is five and at all ages, when he's having a lot of what he would call 'fun', he looks very intent and purposeful at what he's doing. When he's concentrating, he's not really smiling or expressing happiness, he's thinking about what's going on right in front of him. Some kids are more active, busy learners; girls are likely to be a little more relational/social than boys at this age too. Some kids are fly-by-the-seat-of-their-pants joyful and flit from activity to activity and some have a more solemn demeanor.

Do what Wickerparkgirl suggested and ask specific questions. One thing I would also encourage you to remember is that we teachers often use the term 'friends' a bit euphemistically. There is sometimes a degree of affection between children, but when we say that children are having fun with their friends, we might also mean that we had a great time doing some music and movement activities and playing in close proximity with each other in the sandbox. Keeping in mind that sharing space is a real challenge for many kids, it sounds like you are getting some positive feedback.

One more thing to add: you are meeting with the director, but she is not in the room with the toddlers. Any chance you could get a phone conversation in with the lead teacher before then? I only ask this because as someone who's been in that position, I would wonder why the parent wasn't asking me first. The teacher is going to have better knowledge of your son's day. At the day-cares I have worked at, the directors were more or less peripheral figures when it came to the child. I suggest scheduling a time to talk on the phone because then the teacher can give you her full attention instead of short "this was a fine day" information. As a toddler/preschool teacher, I would appreciate parents coming to me with their concerns first, and then if an issue was more complex and harder to resolve, for all of us to work as a team with the director's guidance.

Good luck!

Children play beside each other at that age, not with each other. The behavior you are seeing is totally normal. If his teachers thought something was wrong with the way he is acting, they would tell you. The fact that they are saying he had a great day means he had a great day! He will learn to interact with other children as he grows older, don't worry.

You are talking about the end of the day. At that point, he may have had enough of his "friends" and just wants some time to himself.

Like other posters have said, kids don't play "with" each other so much at this age as they play "near" each other.

If you're really curious about what he's doing say an hour after you drop him, come back, drop in and see.

Everything sounds just fine here. Don't try to fix something that isn't broken.

22 month old children do not play with others.. they start to learn to play with others after they are 3 years old.

your child is normal.. he doesnt have the language and skills to play with others.. he can not share.. he is not there yet.

Having a good day for a 22 month old.. is generally following the routine.. eating when it is time to eat... not fighting too much about diaper changes... not fighting too much with his classmates. maybe sitting still and listenin to a story at story time..

if you are unsure about the day care stop by during hte mid day and see how it is going.

I agree with Hazel and Wickerparkgirl, talk to the lead teacher and ask some more specific questions if you're concerned. While it may seem like a "canned" response, the teacher may just be trying to let you know that he did okay and not to worry (especially since she might think you are worried because of the crying at drop off) since it's the first time in daycare for both you and your son...

I'll agree with all the other posters on the parallel play. For my daughter, at 22 months, a "good day" at daycare meant that she was involved in various activities and didn't get bit/have a major accident. She also did a lot of "walking around by herself" at pickup although I think it was around that age that she started "making friends." There are a few kids that moved up into the preschool room with her, and now they all say hi to each other and play together.

I think he's doing just fine. :)

I haven't read the other responses.....Your son is rather young to actually be playing with someone else. Developmentally, they typically engage in "parallel play.' He sounds pretty normal. Playing with someone comes a bit later.

This sounds like normal behavior, hes only 22 months, and hes been alone for all that time, he will need time to adjust, Hell, on certain days, MY 4yo cries and acts up, whe I drop her off, but she is NOT a morning person.

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At this age he has no concept of playing with friends. He is a toddler and they play by themselves all the time. It is much closer to 3 years old when they actually start playing together, like homemaking together and playing the roles of the family, or playing blocks and all the kids play parts of the town working together.

It is absolutely common at this age for his to be doing independent play. Google side by side play or parallel play.

Here is a link to some research that talks about the type of play I am telling you about.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2008/07/6-types-of-play-how-we-l...

Plus he's been at home with mostly adults and has no experience with this type of situation. He has a whole new world of toys to experience and things to touch, things to taste...eww, things to take apart and put back together. He is totally engaged in what he is doing and is very happy doing this very necessary stage. His brain is wiring connections between his 2 lobes and he is creating the wiring that he will use the rest of his life to learn.

Give him some time. It may be the end of Summer before he starts really interacting with the other kids and really looking on at what they are playing and imitating them, the next stage after that will be the typical interaction style of play.

But truthfully, he is right on the money developmentally. It is NORMAL for him to be playing alone or alongside the other kids on some occasions.

As a mom and former preschool/toddler teacher it sounds pretty normal. Kids don't play much together at that age. They tend to play with their own things in parrellel play. Chances are he is having a a "great day." Remember it's all new to him and come the end of the day when you get there he could be tired. Follow your gut instincts with stuff and if possible make a pop in visit. Depending on how he will handle you leaving try one where you see him and he doesn't see you (if possible). Try not to let them know and just show up.

Our daycare has closed circuit cameras in each classroom....does yours? If so...problem solved!

I'm going to take the other side, only because it may help you in the long run. My daughter behaved in the same way but it continued and never changed. She is nearly 18 and in January, finally diagnosed with Asperger's Disorder on the autism spectrum. I had taken her to a doc at 10 and suspected as much, but she was not diagnosed as apparently girls were not thought to be able to have it until more recently. He may be fine, but it is something to consider. Best of luck to you.