Help! My 14 month old has started hitting me in the face when he doesn't get his way and is also trying to bite. This usually happens when I have to pick him up and he doesn't want to be picked up. My little boy is so sweet so I was shocked at first. I've tried many different tactics: Saying "No, you don't hit mommy"; Distracting him with a different toy or something new to look at; Holding his arm down (not too hard) while saying no; Time-out (not even sure he understands this); Showing him how to be gentle by stroking my arm with his hand. The last one has worked a little because there are times that he will hit and when I say "No, you don't hit" he responds by putting his head on my shoulder and patting me on the back. Maybe he is more confused??? I'm not sure. I don't know where he has learned to hit since there is no hitting in the family and he doesn't watch TV. I'm really worried about this behavior and will take any advice you may have. Has anyone else had a child about this age do something similar? How did you handle it? Were you able to teach your child that it is not OK to hit? What do you think about time-out at this age? Thanks!
Thanks for the advice! I'm so relieved to know that this a normal phase for his age. I'm going to work on being firm and consistent and hopefully he will outgrow this sooner than later. Thanks again! -L.
I think your showing him gentle touches is perfect. You may need to do it a few times so he catches on. I agree I think under 2 is too young for time out, but it varies by kid.
My 11.5 month old is biting but its cause his teeth hurt..he is teething. He will hug me, then bite my shoulder.
My daughter did this as well. It's frustrating and embarassing when in front of people. I tried EVERYTHING!! But trust me - they grow out of it. I got the point I just told her no hitting and sat her down. She hated that because she wanted me to hold her. You might need to try something else he doesn't like. But hitting her only made it worse. I would spat her hand. Didn't help!! Just made her little hand red and me feel horrible. Every mom told me to do that. they were wrong. Do what's best for you and your child. But know that he will grow out of it. If he keeps biting, I hear if you bite him back - he will quit. Every mom said that one works. Up to you though. Luckily, Audrey didn't do that one. But I do believe I would have tried it if she did.
I am pretty sure this is very age-appropriate and all my kids went through a very similar stage. My son, now 22 months, was the one we struggled with the most, though (I think it's a boy thing). Having said that, it sounds like you are doing everything right. Stick with it and stay patient, he will outgrow it!!
Its pretty safe to say that most kids go through this stage at this age - mine certainly did, and all his little buddies have as well. Anytime he hurt me, I would set him down quickly and say "No Hitting/No Biting - time out." in a firm voice, not yelling. He would have to sit in a chair (or wherever) for one minute. At first he didn't understand what time out meant, but at two he knows now and it is a very effective discipline tool. He would sometimes sit and cry, and other times try to get up and leave, at which point I would hold him in time out for one minute.
A friend recommended a few books to me (her son is 2 months older, so he started hitting/biting right before mine did) They are Hands Are Not For Hitting and Teeth Are Not For Biting. You can find at most book stores or on Amazon.com
There are others in the series too (We also have Tails Are Not For Pulling) They are geared for children 0-3 yo, short, and easy to follow. After his time-out, we would read whichever book was appropriate. It took time, but he learned that these were not good behaviors, and rarely hits, and hasn't bitten in a long time. He also loves the books, and sometimes brings them to me to read, and he reads along with me :)
Be consistant with your discipline choice, and make sure any other caregivers also treat these behaviors the same way so he gets the message.
