The lady that used to watch my son told my husband she missed him and to ask me if she could watch him one day this week. His daycare is closed--he goes to the district daycare b/c my mom is a teacher, so they are closed for the school holiday. Anywho, I would have asked her in the first place, but I didn't want to have to pay her, as I am not having to pay daycare this week, so in the money went to our savings. Soooo, if she asked to keep him, is she expecting to be paid?!?! Would it be rude of me to simply tell her why I had not asked her in the first place? I know she misses him, so I feel bad for not letting her keep him, but it felt so nice not to have to pay daycare this week. And I would feel bad, once again, for not paying her to keep him.
i agree with nancy b - nicely say, "oh that's okay, we were already planning to save the money this week, i had planned to stay with him so we wouldn't have to pay a sitter. maybe we can set up a play date sometime soon!" then she can bust in with "OH i don't want you to pay me!!" if she wants :)
Sure, tell her the reason why you had not asked her in the first place. You can do it very pleasantly, just say, "We would have loved to have you watch our son, but we were really counting on the savings we'll get from not having him in daycare this week." Pause, and then see if she reissues her offer. If she doesn't, you might invite her for tea or something sometime this week, so that she can see him. Good luck.
Just tell her you'd love to let him come over, but you already have plans for the money you're saving. That gives her the opportunity to do it for free if she wants, or to ask for him some other time.
I'd be honest and open. Tell her that the money you saved from not putting him in daycare you put into savings and that you'd love to make her a homemade meal or cookies in replacement for watching him 1-2x. I'm sure she'll say no to that but understand it's not a paid gig.
As she asked to have him , I would assume she is not expecting any payment , but if you are not comfortable with asking or telling her that you won't be paying , and you know that she misses him then why not suggest a meeting/playdate for you both? That way you are there and she get's to see your son.
I don't think it's "rude" to tell her you were relieved to be able to save some daycare expense – that's just factual. She may need that information to help understand your reluctance.
But consider whether her assistance would be good not only for her, but for your son, and perhaps helpful to you during a busy week. If she were to offer either free care or a reduced price, would that be reasonable for you? She may miss your son, AND need the money.
Hi A.
I think she is asking just to spend time with your son not looking for employment during this week.
She would have worded it different if she was looking for work.She would have said "if you are ever stuck for childcare I am still free"
I think she just wants to reconnect and spend time with your son.
Maybe you should say to her "yes that's ok if you want to spend the day with him ,we are free next ?"
Best of luck
B.
I wouldn't feel bad - I would just mention that you would "love" to have her watch him - but you are saving your money for Christmas (or whatever...) and then you would find out if she was expecting to be paid. My guess is yes - she would like to be paid and is just putting the info out there that she is available. But no worries - your son is happy and you are saving the money.
Maybe see if you could meet at a mall or something, she can play with him at a playplace or something... that way she can't expect to be paid because you will be there, or if you are close enough maybe invite her to dinner instead.
