I'm PMSing so I know my perception is skewed this time of the month.
My son hurt my friend's sons feelings. I sent an email the same evening it happened letting my friend know that I'm sorry it happened. My friend seems to understand that my son can be difficult to manage at times (special needs) so I felt like she was understanding of the incident.
However she hasn't responded to my email apologizing. I sent another general email today and haven't received a response.
Is she really upset about the issue that happened so she's not responding because she's upset or maybe just busy w/life and her no response is just due to being busy? I think she was having email issues too so it could be that.....
I don't like people getting hurt so I'm naturally a worrier when it comes to these types of issues.
Any advice to ease my mind?
Thanks!!
Why don't you call her? Email can seem impersonal and is much easier to blow-off than a phone call. If you don't reach her and she doesn't call you back within a day then you'll know she's mad.
The whole time I was reading your questions I was asking myself "Why doesn't she just call her?" I don't know your relationship with this friend, or how close you are, but I would think an apology is better done "in person" not by email. I had a situation once like yours, where my daughter hurt the feelings of her friend (my good friend's daughter). My daughter was absolutely wrong and I was horrified by what she said to her. There was no way I was just going to email my friend. I called her right away, apologized, and explained the whole situation. Then I sent my daughter over to her house to apologize to her daughter. I felt horrible for a long time about it, but I knew I had done everything I could. Try calling her and talking it out! You'll sleep better tonight.
Don't email a third time. She probally didn't even read the first 2 yet.
These talks are best on the phone or in person.
I am sure she has let it go.
Call her. the art of conversation has really gotten lost, but if you are truly sorry, there's nothing better than verbal, heart-felt apology!
Not everybody checks their email every 5 minutes (like I do, tehehe).
Let a few days go by, you know?
Don't worry so much, you sound like a great mom and a good friend!
Enjoy the weekend.
:)
Email can be slow. I'm a bad answerer on occasion.
If you really want to get it done and overwith, call her.
Why haven't you just called her? Emailing someone an apology is very impersonal & seems like a cop out. I'm sure she's just busy. I'm also sure she'd appreciate the call over an email. Good luck :-)
Really, you listed out all the possible reasons that you have not heard from her, all of them legitimate. I would just try to not worry about it. You appologized and that's really all you can do. Either she understands and accepts it or she doesn't. You don't say how often you talk or see her but let a reasonable amount of time go by and call her if you don't hear back from her. Just tell her you want to make sure everything is ok between the two of you as you appreciate your friendship. Good luck!
The question is really, is there anything else you could do? She may still be hurt, and be putting you off until she feels "over it." Or perhaps she feels you haven't done enought? Maybe she thinks you should discipline your son more if this keeps happening? I have no idea certainly - I am jus tsaying, you can't do much more than apologize and put the ball in her court. Give her a little time. Consider whether you really took the issue seriously enough. Ask her about it the next time you see her.
I'm a worrier too, but you can only do so much.
What are the ages of the kids???
Just give her space. Maybe she is busy.
And for some, if a person sends them an e-mail or even if that is an apology... they think "Why" do they then have to respond to an apology and back and forth? I mean, what is done is done.
Next, she may be... thinking about things. For example: if she and her child continues to play with your son, even if they completely UNDERSTAND he is special needs... then, they know, it will happen again. ie: her son getting hurt feelings etc. So then, she and her son, needs to think, about if... it is good for them. Does she want her son to keep getting hurt feelings? Is that good for her son/is that fun for her son/is that something her son even wants to do/does her son even want to play with your son, etc.
Maybe, this is a real conundrum for her... and her son. Especially IF her son, is telling her he does not want to play, with your son because maybe they don't mesh real well.
Even if... they completely understand about your son being special needs.
I imagine, your friend DOES understand. And you did apologize to her. But I also imagine, this maybe happened before? Or it will happen, again.
Since you know and your friend knows... that your son "can be difficult to manage at times (special needs)..." as you said.
I am PMS'ing too.
OMG, I hate it.
Hugs to you for that.
Don't worry about it..you've done all you can do at this point. When she comes around, she'll let you know. I'm sure it's not a big deal.
