Working Full or Part Time??? - Littleton,CO

Updated on November 17, 2009
L.K. asks from Littleton, CO
5 answers

I recently started back to work. I was looking for part time work for a few months and had no luck. Then, all of a sudden I got several offers simultaneously. I decided to accept two of them, thinking that I could balance two part time jobs, our baby and the house. Now that I have been working for two weeks, I am really struggling. I feel so busy that I am doing a lousy job at both jobs, as well as at home. Its tearing me up that I haven't had time to cook dinners, hardly shower, and I don't have the enthusiasm with my son that I should. Have any of you out there gone back to work and gotten used to it, or who have chosen to stay at home or work part time? What are your thoughts on balancing family, work and life?

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D.M.

answers from Denver on

I have worked full-time and part-time while being a mom to my two kids (now 3 and 20 mos). It is challenging to try to balance it all - children, spouse, work, home, friends, and time for you!!!

A friend gave me great advice - "whatever you are doing at the time, do the best you can". Since you can't be two places at once, focus on the present moment. Simple advice, hard to totally embrace. I relate to feeling like you are doing nothing "well".

Likely, you are doing better at all than you think, but you are exhausted... for good reason. Two part time jobs are tough to balance. Can you do just one? That would be my main advice on your post - it may give you some relief. Also, don't be too hard on yourself, it is still early and you will adjust. Give yourself permission to find out what you need and adjust accordingly.

Take Good Care!

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K.B.

answers from Denver on

I did work full time when my kids were babies. It was hard, and it was an adjustment. But I had one full time job, not 2 part time ones. If you can afford it, I think you should quit one of your jobs. I would imagine trying to juggle 2 different work schedules plus being a new mom is very stressful.

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K.P.

answers from Boise on

Really digest the words I am about to tell you..."You can always be replaced at any old job, but you can NEVER be replaced as Mommy." You are trying to be Superwoman, and it is IMPOSSIBLE. Your baby needs you to be there to hold him, play with him, rock him, sing to him, teach him and love him. And your husband needs you to take care of him by being a loving, non stressed wife, who enjoys creating a warm place for him, your baby and you. I was a full time stay at home mom for 7 years until very recently when my youngest started school, and I can tell you that even though my schedule is "almost" perfect because it works around school and my husband's schedule so that one of us is always home with the kids, I still have a hard time keeping up with daily stuff, and I only have ONE job outside the home. Get your priorities strait. Put your baby and husband first, and make a budget that will keep you home and your family happy that you did so. You will probably be surprised that your husband will be transformed into a very happy man who is proud to go out every day and "slay dragons" to take care of you and his son, and will hardly be able to wait to come home to your arms and lips. One more thing, mommyhood is not something that should be juggled, it's something you need to put all of your energy and heart into. It doesn't sound like you have the time or energy right now to be a mommy. If it's a money thing, the first thing you can do is cut out the non-essentials like cable, cell phones, expensive car payments, expensive clothing, etc. Get creative and see how much money you can save every month. I think you know the right thing to do, it's just a matter of making it happen.

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A.A.

answers from Columbus on

Hi L., you poor thing! Can you get by with the money from just one part time job? If you were doing just one job is it possible that they might offer you a few more hours eventually? It sounds like one job is really your best choice, even if you worked more hours. The driving to and from, changing clothes (if needed), driving home, etc seems like it would take up quite a bit of time. You may be better off getting a full time job and try to negotiate shorter hours or some work from home if they give you a laptop.

If you need to keep both jobs, can you afford to hire someone to clean the house and maybe make a dinner or two for the week?

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M.W.

answers from Boise on

Hi L.,

If you were a 9 month old baby, what would your ideal life be like? If he could tell you, I bet the top of his list would be Mommy, Daddy, food, sleep, toys. He cares more about you than anyone or anything else. If you were a husband, what kind of wife and mother would you want? Are money and things more important to him than your caring for his baby, his home, feeding him nice home-cooked meals, with a happy smile on your face, in a clean house? What do you want the most? Don't you want a happy family more than anything else? I am sure you can figure out what would be best to do.

Take care,
Marci

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