Wisdom Needed! Best One Piece of Advice for New Moms

The best advice I received was from my mother-in-law, she told me that my son had no one to compare me to and that I would be the best mom he had ever known. It totally helped me relax and follow my instincts.

Hello, Hold them and love them no matter what, but don't be afraid to discipline them when they need it.
K. K.

Sleep when the baby sleeps.
Don't try to do everything - trying to be super Mom will exhaust you.
If anyone offers to help (cook a meal, do a load of laundry, etc), say yes.

Teach your children to say "Daddy" as soon as possible. That way, at 2 a.m. when the wee one is screaming, "Da Da!!!", you can wake hubby and let him know the kid needs him. Meanwhile, you stay tucked in a warm bed.

The BEST advice for new a mom?

Before there was a baby there was your husband. After your baby goes off to college and is on their own, there will be your husband. Provided you love and cherish each other and include him in and not push him out or make him wait in line after your children for your attention and affection. A husband should be a helper with your children, but not have to compete with them for your affection.

I know this sounds strange, but your husbands first priority should be you, not his job/career. Your first priority should be him, not your kids.

Good luck to you and yours.

Don't panic and carry a towel....

No matter how tired you are, greet your child every morning with ecstatic hugs kisses and joy. It sets their tone for the whole day. Do it when you see them after events and even when they re-enter a room. Show them how happy you are to see them. My kids still light up numerous times per day with pride when I'm happy to see them.

I always tell my new mom friends "Put your baby to sleep DROWSY but not already asleep. Let them learn to fall asleep on their own w/o having to be rocked or nursed or otherwise relying on YOU to do all the work for them."

Labor is nothing to be afraid of. It's not as scary as they show it on tv.

It feels like a series of progressively stronger menstral cramps, followed by the strong urge to have a bowel movement.

If you have someone there, the most helpful thing they can do for you is time the contractions. If they tell you when one is about to hit and you start your breathing before it hits, it hurts much less. It also helps when they tell you that the contraction is about to be over. They will get a bit harder and closer together and then when you feel like you are about to poop yourself - it's time to push. Conserve your energy for the pushing. Once the baby is delivered, send your husband to check on the baby so he won't be there when the afterbirth is delivered! That's an image he will never get out of his head!

Each and every child comes out different and with his own personality and needs. Read lots of books, get lots of advice from seasoned moms but in the end you have to know that your baby is DIFFERENT than every other baby! And you know him best! Try different things and see what works for you. Also what works for this child will NOT work for your next child. It will be totally different! At least that's what happened to me! Ha ha! Definitely agree with sleeping when baby sleeps and also you cannot hold a new baby too much!!! You will miss it so much when its gone so when people say you are spoiling your baby totally ignore them!!!! :)

Don't start what you'll want to stop!!!! The best advice ever. So, don't give a pacifier if you will want it to stop. Don't let them sleep in your bed if you will want them to move. Don't give baby names for things (ba-ba, wa-wa) if you will want them to say the words properly. Don't let them bring their blanket everywhere if you will want them to leave it at home. And yes, the baby stage goes way to fast. But, to be honest, it all goes too fast. Oh, and one last thing.....a clean house is great, but spending quality time with your kids is better.

Do NOT rock that baby to sleep! Put them in their OWN bed/crib AWAKE and they will learn to self-sooth themselves to sleep. I did this with my first one from day ONE and both my kids to this day (ages 12 and 9) are excellent sleepers. Oh, and along the same line, don't keep the house quiet when they are sleeping, they will learn to sleep thru anything...and they do! =)

It's okay if your baby cries!

Quickly you will know your child...you will know best what is right for your family and what is wrong. Don't let others promote their opinions if you don't agree.

Best advice I rec'd-

if the baby wont stop crying, and you feel like you want to throw him against a wall-the best thing to do is put him in his crib and walk away for a few mins No one gets hurt, and mom can calm down.

Enjoy that precious time you have bonding with your baby. The house and everything else can wait. Let others help you with the cleaning etc. Spend as much time as possible bonding. It is the BEST.

TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS!! For some reason everyone will feel the need to give you (often conflicting) advice. Trying to do the "right" thing will stress both u and your baby out. Every baby and mother is unique. What works for one won't necessarily work for another. Trust yourself to know what your baby needs ... after all you've been intimately linked for 9 months! Trust me, NOBODY knows your baby better than you do!! I REALLY wish someone had told me this when I was a new mom. :(

RELAX you may be a new mom but your baby is also a new baby--it you goof it's okay he won't know.

Babies don't NEED a lot of new stuff or all matching stuff. Yes it's cute to do the baby room in all coordinating stuff but as long as the baby is comfortable he/she doesn't care if everything matches.

Dress the baby only as warmly as you are dressed. If it's hot out baby doesn't need to be in an undershirt (onesie) and long pants with socks and shoes.

I would say...

"Don't sweat the small stuff...

And, in the long run...'most' of it IS small stuff!"

Best!
michele/cat

- Be sure and take a shower and put on fresh clothes EVERY DAY. Even if its at 2am! (saved my sanity!)

- Don't keep the house completely quiet when baby is sleeping. Make some noise!!

- Don't sleep with a baby in a reclined recliner

- When sleeping with the tv on at 2am, turn it to QVC. There are no scary commercials to worry about.

- Don't rock a baby to sleep.
- Don't sing baby more than 1 song at nap/bedtime.

Relax... take a deep breath and relax. I am a nurse who home visits new moms and the one thing I see the most is; moms' freaking out at the smallest things. Your baby takes his or her cues from you, so if you freak out so will they. Stay calm and use your thinker, it will probably be right, but if you're still in doubt call a friend, relative or someone like me. We'll help you through it.

Accept all the help that is offered to you. Sleep when baby sleeps even if the dishes don't get done.

Here's mine: Take advice from other people with a grain of salt.

Wish I'd been told that when I had my son!!!! I drove myself crazy trying to do the things people "advised" me on and it all conflicted!!!!

NEVER wake a sleeping baby!!!

Enjoy everything, even the hard moments, and even the little cries because they grow up way too fast!

Don't take other people's advice and stories to heart! What worked for thier child may not work for yours. Each child is unique and must be dealt with as such. Don't ever compare your child to other children, either. My older grandson was very advanced - talked very early, was potty trained before 18 months and was so well mannered. His younger brother, however, is so opposite it scares me sometimes! Just treat each day as a new learning opportunity with your baby. Will you make mistakes? Of course you will. But be assured they are the same mistakes most of us made as new moms. And I have only heard ONE woman in my life who claims her baby NEVER rolled of the bed when she reached over to get something while changing the baby. (and personally, I don't believe her!)

Trust your gut; listen to your motherly instinct; don't let what others tell you or what you read freak you out because every child is different and yours is exactly how he/she should be.

There's more than one right way to do things. I had to learn that the hard way...after reading all the new mother/new baby books and listening to everyone's advice...a lot of it didn't work with my kid. I had to find my own right way to do things...and not feel like I was doing something wrong.

Make sure to remember you. The little things like painting your toenails or a pink lip gloss can boost your spirits :)

Trust YOUR instincts, smile and listen to all the many many many pieces of advice you WILL get. But that dosen't mean you have to take it :)

Rest when your baby sleeps!

Don't be afraid to ask for help.

Enjoy every little moment!

Don't let things overwhelm you and go a day at a time, or minute at a time sometimes. Laugh. Smile and talk to your baby all the time.

you always love the child but it is OK to hate the behavior
NEVER say anything hurtful to your child it stays with them forever!

Its ok to feel over whelmed. Its ok to let the dishes sit in the sink for an hour to keep sane. Its ok to ask for help after a long night being up with the baby. To be tired, and scared is normal but remember we all make it through, one day at a time!

All phases are temporary!

From "The Baby Whisperer" by Tracy Hogg: "Start as you mean to go on." In other words, don't start any bad habits that you'll just have to break later on. You'll only make more work for yourself!

Take LOTS of Pictures and WRITE stuff down that they do! Your memories of being pregnant, the birth the little moments etc! You think you'll never forget those things, but they fade over time.

Ditto the don't keep the house quiet and teach your baby to go to sleep on his/her own...BEST thing you can do for both ot you!

Ditto trust your instincts...you will make mistakes, learn from them don't dwell on them.

Get involved w Parents as Teachers...

Start a college savings account!

LOVE that baby, don't forget yourself OR your hubby. Make time for yourself and him.

My best advice is to write everything down - all the mile stones, places you take the baby, things the baby does, says (when you get to that point), etc. because you'll forget (also write down when the baby had immunizations because you will need that for school and camp). I started writing everything down before my son was born and continued to write everything almost every day - especially funny things he says. My son is 9 years old now and I still write things down - he even tells me things that I should add to the book. I have over 150 typed pages of things he did, said, places he went.... He has his whole history in one place. The other thing I would tell you is that no matter what all the baby books say, your baby will be an individual with his/her own way of doing things - so you just have to go with it - don't stress about little things. Good luck!

Take lots of pictures. They grow and change so fast. Document all of their milestones. You will think that you will always remember, but years from now, you wont remember the first time they crawled, or walked, unless you write it down.

Breathe and count! When things get a little crazy and you think you can't regain control, just remember to BREATHE and COUNT out loud to 15. It's amazing how much better things seem when you remember to do this.... :)

Either "Listen. Listen to yourself and to those around you." or "Trust yourself."