My 4 year old is ready for bed at about 6:45 but my 2 year old isn't ready to be put down until closer to 7:30 (he has a nice nap during the day). My question is, if your older child goes to bed earlier, what do you do with your younger one to keep them occupied? I have tried having him in the room with us but he can't settle down so my daughter doesn't get a calm nightime routine. I have tried having him play in his room or crib but he usually just screams for me. And he has no interest in television so I can't put a show on for him. I only need about 10 minutes alone with my 4 year old at bedtime and it is most productive if the time is quiet....any suggestions?
Here is a little more information: Thanks so much for all the responses! My kids both wake up at about 6:30am and my daughter will wake up that early usually whatever time she goes to bed. She hasn't napped since she was 2 and goes to school in the afternoon, but my son really needs and likes his nap. My husband doesn't get home until about 8 or so, so I am on my own for bedtime....
Maybe try stretching the 4 year old's bedtime out 45 min., so they can both go to bed at 7:30. My two are 18 mo. and 3 and the routine is to take a bath together and read stories together, then I just put them both to bed.
What time do your kids get up in the morning? Mine don't go to bed until 8:30 or 9:00 pm! If I put my kids to bed that early, they'd be up for the day around 4:00 am! Ok, just had to get that off my chest.
I do put my 5 year old to bed and then put the 2 year old to bed. I do find it to be much easier. We do bath, brush teeth, read books, bed. The 2 year old loses interest in some of the books, so I really focus on the 5 year old during this time. My 2 year old usually entertains himself with a book. We have a Leapfrog Tag Reader (each of my boys have their own), so sometimes I give him his Tag Reader and a Tag book. He likes to come running into the room, so we don't have a perfect system. Honestly, I've been known to lock the door so he can't come in. We run a box fan during the night to help block out noises, so even if he does make some noise down the hall while I'm with big brother, he isn't too bothered by it.
Just keep trying things, a book, a fun toy. You'll find something that works.
i suggest that the 4 year old could do with a nap too. you should be able to get them on the same schedule pretty easily. i think your options are either have them both take naps (my 4 1/2 year old still does and i have no plans to have him stop) or have the disjointed bed times, because little kids still need about 11-12 hours total sleep. good luck!
Could the 3 of you lay in your bed, read books, calm down? Then when you put 4 yr old to bed, 2 yr old could stay on your bed and look at his board books (save special books/toys that light up, keep him entertained) for those 5 extra minutes that you're tucking your D in and saying prayers. I think saving special toys for this time only would be a great idea. Magnadoodle, light-up keyboard, a special flashlight.
Are you a single mom? If not, then get Dad to help you out for just those 10 minutes.
ADDED: So dad's not there in the pm hmm. Perhaps the neighbor middle-school girl would come over for 10 minutes every evening and play with your little one. Pay her $10 a week??
I agree to tweak naps (or quiet time for 4 year old) for each of them so they can both go down together..
Yeah......I would do the 4 year old nap thing. My boys (ages 4 1/2 and 20 months): I've learned what tires them out and make sure they go outside to do that, about 45 minutes before nap. They play soccer (or even better----swimming---it makes them TIRED and HUNGRY) for 30 minutes. Then they come in, get cleaned up/changed, eat their lunch (not too heavy: a sandwich and piece of fruit or handful of grapes most of the time). After lunch, they go to bed. My oldest goes to the bathroom, gives me kisses, and puts himself to bed. I change the youngest's diaper and put him to bed, then come back and tuck in the oldest. Sometimes he sleeps (most of the time), other times he just lays there and rests. But if I have something fun planned for the evening, I tell him he needs to SLEEP or he won't have the energy to stay up for the cool thing (kung fu, fireworks at the park, whatever). The 4 year old will have a 1-2 hour nap, the 20 month old has a 2-3 hour nap. (Since lunch is 11:30 and naptime around 12, they basically just sleep through the heat of the day). Between 8-8:20 the youngest goes to bed. The oldest stays on the couch with his dad and they talk or play memory while I say "Victor, do you want to go night night?" He will smile, give everyone kisses, and we change him, brush his teeth, read a short book, and go to bed (his big boy toddler bed). Then I come back in, we read a book with the oldest (husband usually reads), do the same thing, and he's in bed around 8:30. They get up between 6-7am. That's what works for us. I think it's easier to give the oldest a nap in the day if necessary so that he (in your case she) can go to bed just a few minutes later, because it's easier for the older child to entertain herself for 5-10 minutes than for the younger child to do so.
My boys are almost 3 yrs apart ( 2 yo and 5 yo) and very scheduled with their sleep times. They both wake up around the same time in the morning and then they both have nap/quiet time in the afternoon. They both go to bed at the same time, around 8:30. The time will change when the oldest starts school this year, but both of them will be getting up early, their nap/rest time will be earlier and they'll be ready for bed when it's time.
If the 4 yo is home with you during nap time, make sure she "rests" as well. I don't make my 5 yo go to sleep, but I do make him lay down and be quiet while his brother naps. I have a home daycare, and regardless of age, everyone has to nap/rest at the same time.
un supervised snacks for 2 yo's worry me a bit, choking especially if he is a screamer.
If the TV doesnt' work then a book or music on CD might not either right? Could you switch out toys that he hasn't seen in a while and ONLY gets to play with during this time??
mine are 18 mo apart and we would just get in a routine and something would change and w had to adjust but we got through it.
My two are 22 months apart, they have had the same bedtime for a year. About 9 months ago my youngest started pushing his nap time later in the day, making his bedtime later than his older sister's. I had him stop napping so they continued to have the same bedtime. It sounds like you have 3 options: Have them both nap, have neither nap, both of those routes are in an effort to have the same bedtime for both kids. OR you could train the youngest to occupy himself for the 10 minutes you need to tuck in older sibling...unless he is exceptionally stubborn or cranky I would say he would adjust to 10 minutes on his own in his room every evening in about a week...would a snack help? Maybe snack + tv in his room every day at the same time? Yes he will scream at first, but it is just like establishing any other new routine. These ages and bedtime routines can be tricky, they take time and change every few months as the kids grow, I find the whole bed thing very frustrating even when everything goes well :) Good Luck!
I would say that pushing back the early bedtime to a more reasonable one that both would go down together. That's way too early. The older one is going to be going to Kindergarten next year so they'll be having a busier schedule, school activities and sports, they need to be getting used to going to bed later. A regular bedtime for this age child is around 8-9pm.
