What's the Right Breakfast Routine?

I think Dad should sit down with the kids and eat a very small bowl of cereal if he can't wait until the kids are done eating. Then, when the kids are done, and off playing, he can make his smoothie. He can give them little cups of it if that is what you want to do, after everyone has eaten their cereal. If Dad can wait, he doesn't have to have the cereal, but it could be a bonding time, sitting down with them to a meal. It will be peaceful and relaxed without them crying and whining. This way, he can have his smoothie and drink it too. After the cereal.

I think it is only reasonable (and fun) to make smoothies for all when dad is home. No need to fight a natural response from your children.

I would say if he doesn't want to share the smoothies, then he needs to wait until they are finished or have one earlier. You both need to work together. He is just making it more difficult then it needs to be.

Kids stomachs aren't big enough for breakfast AND a smoothie, so it is unfair to make them eat a breakfast before having one.

Oh D., this had me giggling a little bit and I mean no disrespect when I say that.

Your husband needs to learn to share - and not just his smoothies in my very humble opinion.

It's my pet resentment that if my husband is home a little later in the morning, that he gets to fluff around and relax leaving me running around getting the kids ready for school etc. I expect if he is in the house, that he can pitch in and assist. Whether it's walking the boys to the bus stop or helping to monitor showers etc. Unfortunately, I still have to provide instructions on how he can help out at times and it doesn't always come naturally to him, but at least I am able to delegate.

This is obviously one of those little stubborn things we are all capable of doing at times, and shouldn't necessarily be seen as summing up your husbands interactions with his children all the time.

I don't know about other households, but as much as I love my kids, I am not a morning person and at times I find it really hard waking up to the chaos of 4 hungry, noisy kids, all wanting to talk about their dreams, the day ahead. I know in years to come I will miss it, but there are times it is a very overwhelming way to start the day. Sigh, where did the quiet mornings of waking up to coffee and reading the newspaper go?

I would just give him a hug and tell him if he is home in the mornings then it would be sweet if he could pitch in and help. Not leave you to all the child rearing tasks: he is capable of assisting with the breakfast routine with the kids. And his smoothie thing is a healthy hit with the kids who would relish this special thing he does for them.

And you, my friend, get a morning where you are not responsible for getting breakfast ready for the kids!! Yay!

Cheers,

C.

Honestly, I think your husband is being a bit silly. The kids DO eat what you make them . . . when he's not there. When he is there, he changes the dynamic. (And I can guarantee that if he made bacon and eggs (the way my hubby does), the kids would be clamoring for THAT. It's a bonus that smoothies are so yummy, but the biggest pull is that DADDY is making and having it.)

If he wants the kids to eat cereal before having a smoothie, then he should NOT make his darn smoothie until the kids are done with the breakfast you make them. If he insists on making his smoothie in front of the kids, then he should plan to make a smoothie for the kids, too. There's no reason the breakfast routine can't be changed to accommodate his presence. Frankly, I'm sure the kids would love having a "Daddy is home" breakfast routine.

And it's not about caving in or "learning to eat" what you make them. You already know that they are good about this when he's not around. This is about the fact that they love their Daddy and want to imitate him. (And, for crying out loud, it's not as though he's drinking a Bloody Mary or gin and tonic. It's a freaking smoothie! It's something good for them!) Let them have the smoothie with Daddy, or YOU make them a smoothie when you know their father isn't going in early - or have Daddy wait until they are done with their "regular" breakfast.

I assume you know when your huband doen't have to go in early to work. On those mornings, why not skip the cereal altogether, and beat your husband to the punch by making smoothies for everyone? It seems like this has become a pattern in your house, so maybe you can eliminate the whole fuss by just skipping the cereal to begin with, and make the whole family happy. It's not fair to the kids to see dad doing one thing while expecting the kids to do another.

Hope this helps.

I do not understand your husband's reasoning. Does he just not want to make smoothies for everyone? A smoothie is nutritional and good for the kids. And as others have said having a breakfast routing with Dad is good for everyone.

When he fixes a smoothie in front of the kids he is creating a negative situation which will harm his relationship with his kids. Even I see his stance as being selfish. He is intentionally creating a negative atmosphere. Does he act this way with his kids in other ways at other times?

The kids will love sharing breakfast with Dad while getting a healthy breakfast. As they get older they will have memories of good times. As it is now, they will have memories of strife.

My family developed a routine in which we all ate breakfast together on Sunday. My Dad made waffles. Sunday was the only day we could all eat breakfast together. We continued with Dad's waffles on Sunday morning when we visited until he was not able to do it. Also this was one of the few times that I felt close to Dad. He owned his own business and was frequently not around.

Your husbands' attitude blows my mind! I hope that he does other small things together with his children. Sharing is learned small lesson by small lesson. That is also the way intimacy is created.

Your husband does have the right idea about not letting the kids have something because Daddy has it. Of course they shouldn't have a cup of coffee or a beer with dinner. However, smoothies are appropriate for children so why can't they have it while Dad has it in front of them. It reminds me of the kids' saying "neah, neah, you can't have it. It's mine."

D.,

I agree with many of the other posters. Your hubby is being selfish and inconsiderate with his smoothie thing. My kids are 4 1/2 years and 15 months and they want to do everything that we do, even if they're not big enough yet.

If the issue is that he doesn't want to share, then make him wait until the kids are not around to have his special drink, otherwise SHARE!!!

Hope this helps,
Melissa

Hi D.,

Juniper's suggestion was right on the nose!

I don't see the harm, though, in your hubs and kiddos sharing "smoothie day", so I also think your solution is right on the nose! It also could end up being a special event they all bond over. There are so many healthy smoothie options, it's unreal!

Either one is a great option, and hopefully your hubs will want to compromise on this one.

Best of luck!

K. W

I have to agree with the other ladies on the eat a bit of cereal/then have smoothies together idea. It's a good compromise, and if the smoothie is made with fruit,yogurt,etc., could be even healthier than just eating the cereal alone.