What Size Rooms Should They Get?

You said he decided to move out, so the person who chose to stay (or didn't have a choice) should get the larger room. I would also give him a time frame. If he doesn't pack his things by a certain day, then you will do it for him, or it may never get done.

Full time child should get the bigger room. Why should a good sized room go to waste every 5 out of 7 days?

I may be the odd one out, but I say the rooms stay as is, unless the oldest wants to give it up completely. We dont have all the info and dont know why he isn't living there full time anymore, or the age of any of the kids, so it is hard to say for sure. But, in order for the oldest child to not feel bad, or like you don't want him there, I would let him keep it. JMO
S.

When my daughter moved out, her brother got her room. I re-did the room. He got to pick out the color and decals. When my daughter visits she sleeps in the guest room.

I think the child that is at your house full time will have better use of the larger room. He obviously has more stuff there, so I definitely think he should get the larger room. The child that is only there every other weekend should pack his stuff up. The next time he is there, tell him he has until the end of the weekend to move his stuff into the other room. If it is not moved by the time he leaves, you will take it as him allowing you to go through and move his stuff.

I honestly would give it to the child who is there every day. 2 or 3 days in the 3rd biggest room isn't going to negatively impact the teen who is only there on weekends. He's not being shoved aside, it's just realistically he isn't there most of the time and shouldn't have that much stuff there anyways, not like the one who lives there all the time anyways. He will survive and thrive.

I think the full time child gets their choice of which room. The weekend child should get the smallest room, especially if they have 'moved out', that means they aren't really living there but have a room elsewhere? Usually I would say the oldest gets the biggest room but if they are in the process of moving out....
if they don't move their own stuff, tell them you are going to moving it and you think they would rather move their stuff...

To me: I don't think it's a "deserve" issue. I think it's a usefulness issue.

If it's creating major problems keeping the kids where they are OR you want the eldest to always feel they have a "room" to come home to over college breaks... I'd change now. But do the "all in one" change. So that the eldest has "their" room for the next 5 years set, and the youngest ones aren't shuffling about constantly.

If it's not creating problems, and you want the eldest not to come home over breaks OR set up the smallest room as a "guest" room (aka where they can stay over breaks, as well as house guests)... wait a year and switch everything around then.

If you're doing it NOW, frame it that you want them to have a room of their own to come home to over breaks and have it be THEIR room. So you want to switch now, so that they can lay "claim" to it/ decorate/ have it be personal. Rather than just go off to college and come home to a room that doesn't feel like "theirs"

The one who lives there full time gets the room. When my parents built their house where we live now I was at the end of my junior year of hs. I lived at home for 2 more years and moved out when I was 20. I had the pick of rooms while I lived there and the room is even still painted the way I did it back then - pretty cool! But whoever is the most senior kid in the house gets the pick of rooms. When it was only my baby sister her bf and their baby, they had her bedroom, my brothers old room for the nursery, a toy room for their daughter, and their own living room. My parents only used the master upstairs and they had the rest of the 4 bedrooms. My parents each have their own office on the first floor so they don't need the other rooms right now. My brother lives there now and he has my old room as his room (best location for kids rooms) and he kept my sister's living room, room as his living room room. But yea, the kid who lives there full time gets the pick of rooms - he might want the smaller room!

The visiting child gets the guest room, unless you have a guest room. If you have a room JUST for him, he gets the smaller space. Why would it be any other way?

Blessings...

I think the kid who lives there gets their choice. And the choice might be determined by which is closer to the master bedroom or other kids rooms. Will loud music or tvs in the night bother anyone? Can he sneak out easier from a particular room? Will he come and go in the late evenings and wake anyone else? Is it far away from everyone else and you would rarely go in or see it and can some "evil deeds" be done in the room without you knowing? (girls, drugs, drinking, weapons),, And dont be so sure that in a year when they move out, that they will stay gone for long. just a warning..lol

How old are the children? Is it from a divorce or is the oldest home from a college she comes home on weekends?
If its a younger child that comes from a divorced household this child might need extra effort to make her fit in. If its a college age child the size of the room is probably not as big as a deal.

It is the home of the child who lives there. He should have first choice. The child that does not live there should be glad he is't sharing a room with his step sibling.

Its a toss up. Draw staws, then no one is to blame if someone doesn't like the outcome.

I would keep the peace and let him keep the room. He made the choice to move out but he still needs to feel welcomed at your place. As the adult in this situation, you need to be careful not to alienate him or push him away. Does the younger one really want the bigger room? How old is the younger one? It is only 1 year...if the younger one is only 11 or 12 they have plenty of time to enjoy the room in a year.
Just think...in one year this will be a non-issue!

i agree with the other posters. the one who is their at the house full time should get the room. either he or you can pack his things. you can ask him to do it,and if he doesn't do it the next time he is home for the weekend, you do it for him.

What room does he have now? Would it make sense to leave the rooms as is? I'm not sure what the full story is but you definitely don't want him to feel like he isn't part of the family. It's hard to determine who deserves something more and it can send the wrong message to both kids that the one who is there full time is more important to you.

I'm the oldest of 5 kids. My siblings are from my parents' second marriages. I was the only one to go back and forth between parents and it was hard. While I decided to leave one home for another, wether I said it or not, i still very much longed to feel a part of both families. My parents left my room as is until I went to college. I felt comfortable when visiting on weekends. Again, don't know the full story but do whatever you feel in your heart to do.

I agree with Sharon D. Why is it necessary to swap rooms? If he is going to be gone completely in a year anyway in particular---what's the rush? As an adult who moved out during college (but came home for visits during holidays and long weekends and some of the summer, etc)... I would have felt "homeless" if my parents had made me take all my stuff and completely give up the room and I would have felt displaced and weird if they made me move all my stuff to a different room than the one I had known...without a compelling reason. If the younger kid has adequate space now, then let him stay there.

I've been told by my husband that my parents were weird about how they set up "my bedroom" in their home (when they moved subsequent to me permanently having my own place as an independent adult), but really, they just put all "my" furniture in the space and called it my room. It was very grounding to know that I always had 'home' to go home to if I needed it. My husband, on the other hand, had a very dysfunctional upbringing and was expected to figure out his own way and bounced around various living arrangements starting in high school...so he never had his "own room" really... even when he 'should' have. So we are from wildly different perspectives...
But I say let the boy keep "his" space for now. What's the rush? Are you seriously so overcrowded that you can't let it go for a year? That sense of security is a very powerful thing for a young adult.