What Do You Do When Something Upsets You

You seem to have a lot on your plate. You and your mom haven't had a good relationship since this man she was living with got together. You have called yourself a walking time bomb in the past few months, are on anti-depressants, and don't get along with other family members.

What precipitated this latest blow-up? Where you trying to get your mom to listen to reason about this man who is abusive to her? Did she hit YOU because she can't hit HIM?

You need to ask yourself what part you played in this fiasco. Don't bother to tell us. We aren't up in your head. If you cannot be honest with yourself about who has the blame here (and maybe it really IS all your mom, we don't know here) then you cannot fix things.

If your medical doctor is the one giving you anti-depressants, ask for a psychiatrist so you can get help straightening your thinking out. When you learn what triggers are happening, then you can learn how to manage them.

You need to come to terms with how you will live with or without your family. You need help to do that. Make sure that you get it.

I know this isn't a "get a laugh" post. I can't think of anything that I could say about this sad and truthfully, alarming, post. So this is meant to be advise instead.

Good luck,
Dawn

I know this may sound cheesy, but....

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

You cannot change the past. You cannot change your mother. You cannot change how other people act to or around you. You cannot stop a user/abuser.

BUT

You CAN change your reaction to them. You CAN allow or not allow them in your life. YOU CAN DECIDE WHO TO HAVE AROUND YOUR SON AND YOURSELF.

Remember, by not making a decision you are actively making decisions. Decide what you want/need and stand up for yourself. It sounds like your bf will help you. A counselor and/or paster may be another good source.

You are not alone, you just don't have the family you want to have. I'm sorry for that, but very few of us really do if we actually think about it.

All I can offer is a glimpse into the future, they will realize who is telling the truth. The best you can do is remember they love you but they are deceived. Your grandma probably doesn't want to believe she raised a daughter like her so she would rather believe you are at fault.

Just back away for a while so you will be emotionally healthy to welcome your family back when they come around and they will come around. :)

I would seriously move to another side of this town or to another city, state of something. Family can be the most horrible part of our life. Sometimes it's better to just make a break of it.

Wow, you are literally in the middle of nowhere! I guess my advice would be to start looking for work in your area of interest, boyfriends too, and see if there are any jobs compatible with your lives and start planning on moving away.

There are lots of opportunity in cities like Minneapolis/ St. Paul, Omaha, or one of the Souix's. I loved the look of Souix Falls when we were traveling that part of the country a few years ago.

Sometimes we just need to make a change and go for it. Talk to your mate and see what his advice is. He knows how hard this is on you. If you can't get away from relatives in this area you guys may just have to face the idea of living close but not too close.

Pray. Pray, pray, pray.

Then pray some more.

You have all good answers here.

Perhaps the question should be, "do I really want to have a relationship with my family?"

At this point the best you can do is stay away from all of them and do not respond or react to any texts or anything. Sounds like these people thrive on trouble and chaos. Use this time to evaluate yourself and your life and decide what you want for yourself, how you want to be as a person and what you want in your life. Think and ponder and pray. Write down your thoughts and figure out who you want to be without them and their influence. Leave them to their own demise. Then write a short sentence on a piece of paper stating what kind of person you want to be (and actually are) for example, "I am a joyful person" Fold the paper up and place it somewhere convient but away like your jewlry box or something. Then go to that paper every day at least three times a day and read it and affirm it inside yourself and put it away again to pick it up later.
When you wake up in the morning confirm yourself as a joyful person and this is a bright day, this is a day you are in charge of your own thoughts and emotions and greet the day with gladness and warmth. Spring up out of bed and take charge with happiness.

Don't allow them to take your energy, your joy, your life.

Blessings for strength and love within your being

You and your mom need help to sort what going on. There might be some deeper issue going on here that she won't let go and take them out every time you are in the same room.

If she won't seek the help, write her a letter as well as your grandmother before you move on. You need to clear your soul and heart before you can move on with your life.

If you don't go to church find a place that is only yours to help find peace of mind. Or pray the pslams to help find that peace of mind. If you ask the good lord for help he will show you the way. But, with everything it takes time and patience.

Your Momma loves you she just does;t know how to express it or show it. Pray for her to find her way to you. Sorry about grandma will protect her daughter if she is the same way

Sometimes it takes a village to raise a child to heal the hurt, that screams out for help to be loved and to understand why this is happening to me once more.

Although you are grown person we are your village as well as your father family that will help you through your struggles.

May the angels shield you with their wings, My the Good Lord Protect You in your Endewors, May your heart heal by finding the true meaning in love.

You can always adopt a new family, go to a nursing home have an adopt grandma, adopt a pet, so forth