As a scientist, if I read a self-help book that puports to have "science" behind it and the science is really....bad, I have a hard time taking the book seriously. Even if everything else in the book is useful.
I am trying to take what's useful and leave the rest, but even then, it's hard to find books that aren't just banking on our insecurities as well.
That said, I just finished "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense". It is written by a linguist and is a wonderful easy read. The verbal aggression in my life is more complex than the examples in the book, but it gave me a whole new way to listen. Now I can get that emotional distance I need to respond (or not, as appropriate) when someone is being...inappropriate.
I really loved the book - it changed my life in a wonderfully positive way (for me - not so positive for people who are used to being aggressive with me:)
Have you ever read a book that changed your life in a wonderful way (self-help or otherwise)? What book? What did it do for you?
Thanks.
Thanks for the great answers everyone!
DadOnPurpose - She is in her late 70s now and has Alheizmers Disease.
O. would be Peace Is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hanh, which is about living in the moment, being "present" and doing well what you're doing when you're doing it--not thinking about what you need to do, should be doing, didn't do, etc. Great read.
Captivating by Stasi Eldrege. In a word amazing. It made me see that there was still a lot of living to do as I raise my family and that being a girl and then a woman rocks. Made me realize a lot of the stuff that contributed to some bad views I had of myself and made me more proud of the woman I am, more accepting of myself and more able to be open to change. I loved it! Even wrote the author a letter. I think it is such a great book about womanhood, I highly recommend it!
"Conversations With God" by Neale Donald Walsch. It affirmed many of my beliefs and also gave me a powerful spiritual boost that has carried over very well into the rest of my life. I read it 15 years ago and it still deeply resonates with me today.
Left Behind. Made me think about God, my relationship and what I am doing wth my life. It changed my life!
I love The Road Less Travelled by M. Scott Peck. It was easy to read, and the chapters were in perfect order. I took special note that had I read some of the later chapters first, I would not have had the same experience. Each chapter prepared me for the next, and the explanations were clear and precise. The tone was very gentle and not at all critical or specifically judgmental, just observant. It is my favorite book because it helped me in my decision to be myself freely. It wasn't the first book on this leg of my journey, but it got me over a significant hump.
The most significant book before that was Are You Really Too Sensitive? by Marcy Calhoun. It was the first book that I'd read that gave me permission to fully be myself. Other books tell you that, but this one knew who I was and still said it.
As an emotional healer, I recommend "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay.WHen we learn to love and accept ourselves we can love others in a more complete way. I try to live by this book. Its full of affirmations that help us live day to day. Many of my friends use it as a guide as well.
#1. - Attaching in Adoption...For anyone adopting, it's valuable to read before, during and after the adoption. Excellent reference for attachment parenting, particularly for adoptive families. The author is clearly an expert and has many real life examples.
#2 - Your 3 year old: Enemy or Friend ...actually, it had almost no tools to help with a 3 1/2 yr old, it just let me know that mine was normal.
I don't know if it was wonderful but 'All Quiet on the Western Front' turned me into a 'dove' (or semi-pacifist) at a rather young age.
The Red Tent. It is not self-help, in fact, I think the genre is "historical fiction"
I read it in my mid 20s and it just helped me reorganize my thoughts on the role of women in history, in the bible and beyond.
I should probably re-read it now to see if it holds some new reveleation . ..
I have read many books but the most pivotal book for me has been the Book of Mormon. It makes me want to be a better person. It helps me get through the hard times, even just the hard days. It seems to have answers for my everyday life and sometimes I feel it is speaking to me.
The Anatomy of Peace by the Arbinger Institute. Very thought provoking and inspirational book on how to heal relationships, especially with spouse and children.
UPDATE
Thanks! I was worried that she had been verbally attacked into silence.
ORIGINAL
just a side note - but i googled your book and this was posted on the author's blog:
"Regarding Suzette Haden Elgin I was asked to "tell everyone that she's really sorry, but she just can't communicate anymore. She just can't focus on things well enough to even answer an email, let alone talk to anyone."
Tao te Ching. I take it as a philsophy, not a religion, so I think everyone of any faith should read it. I try to remember the words every day.
Bridges of Madison County when the main character is told, "This type of certainty come but once in a lifetime." I use that line when I am in deep quandry.
Love & Respect: The love she most desires, the respect he desperately needs. By Emerson Eggerichs
My parents first read it, then went throught the DVD's and lastly went to the conferance. Happily married for 30 years now and yet they still learned alot from reading the book.
It is an amazing book and really puts a lot of things into prespective marriage wise... it even helped think in a different way about work situations.
Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka.
I knew I was raising a strong-willed, challenging child, but this book helped me understand WHY my daughter is like this. And more importantly, that she doesn't behave the way she does to "get to me" or push my buttons. Now that I understand the reason behind it, I can approach situations differently and diffuse a lot of things before they get started.
