What Are Good Reasons to Adopt?

I think that if you have any doubts about it, you shouldn't do it.
I'm not against adoption, exactly the opposite, but if you are worried about an adopted child upsetting the family dynamic any more than you would worry about your own new natural baby doing so, don't do it.
There is nothing wrong with not being cut out for adoption.
Just reading your post, no offense, it's clear you worry more about the affect it would have on your family than you are thinking about what you have to offer a child for a lifetime.
A child who has already been given up should go to someone with no doubts.
I have adopted friends and people in my family and if you're not prepared to know with all your heart this is the right thing, you shouldn't consider it.
Adopted children need unconditional love more than anybody.
They really do.

If you're not prepared to give that it doesn't make you a bad person.

I think your friend is right, you should only adopt if you want to add to your family. If your reason is that you want to help the child, I would foster for awhile.I would even suggest that you do foster for awhile before thinking more about adopting from the state. I work as a foster respite care provider, all of those kids are extremely high needs and it is a serious commitment to their emotional well-being to adopt them. You say that you are not ready to parent an emotionally disabled child, so I would strongly suggest that you not adopt any children.

My little borther is adopted. There were a lot of trials, as he had some mental health issues, but it was a great blessing for our family.

Because it is such a dear thing to me, I hope to adopt one day. One, because I would love to fill my home with children, and also, because i feel like it is a responsibility to provide love and support to any children out there who are in need.

But, if you do it for that reason alone, when the tough times come, you have to really have a great love for that child if it were your own, otherwise it will make those rough moments very hard on the family and the child.

A lot of prayer and self evaluation is needed, I think, in order to reach a decision. Doing the work, through fostering, or even through doing a big brother/big sister program can help as well.

I'm curious why you're thinking of tow or three instead of one more?

Also have you thought about international adoption? there are 3- 6 yr olds and sibling groups available from orphanages in Bulgaria. and other countries. they (like foster kids here) will have emotional baggage, do a lot of research, join a group for prospective adoptive parents before you decide.
We adopted a 6 mo old baby when we had a 14 yr old and 17 yr old. If was very hard for the older kids at first.
PM me if you want

I think that fostering would be good for yoru family. Sometimes there will be an opportunity for a foster family to adopt a child but it will be because that child came to be "yours" through your heart and not through birth. Two of my grandkids are being adopted by their foster families and they never expected to adopt any of their foster kids. But mine came into their life and they just felt that bond with them and when my daughters parental rights were terminated they knew these children were supposed to be theirs. I am already raising several of my grandchildren and so is my ex, so these precious babies have found their earthly families and we could not be happier.

Being a foster parent gives you the opportunity to help families in a great time of need, it gives these children stability they may have never experienced, it gives you the chance to be a mentor to a parent who may have never had a parent teach them. It can be very fulfilling to a person and very rewarding.

I say call your local child welfare office and ask about taking the foster parent classes to get a feel for the experience and see if it is the right fit for your family. As for adopting one of these children, the opportunity may present itself,a nd it may not. At that time your decision as to whether you do it or not would be what ever is right for you at that time.

Thanks for asking this question K.. I am looking forward to reading your responses as I feel the same. i only have one child, and could have more of my own but constantly feel that I should be taking in someone elses child who needs me. It is so weird because I have felt this for many years, even have a spare room set up. I have discussed foster care with my husband and he says go for it if it makes me happy, but I need to know that he wants it too. I worry about the effect it would have on my son who is use to being the only child. I just see so many stories of children who are abused and neglected and my heart breaks. I think I will wait untill my son is in middle school before I make the comitment.