Weening a 19 Month Old

Okay, this might sound crazy, but I have a friend who did this and it worked great for her. Her son was 2 years old and was still nursing, and she had tried everything to ween him. Nothing worked and she was getting desperate. So she started putting lemon juice on her nipples and let him start to nurse. He would give her a weird look and disguisted face, and she'd just say, "Mama's milk is going bad" or something to that effect. After just a couple of times of that, he didn't want to nurse anymore! So, I know that sounds a little weird, but it's worth a shot. Luckily my baby weened himself at 6 months, so I don't have that problem. But good luck to you - I hope everything works out!

First off, good for you for nursing for so long!!! I'm also an alternative lifestyle type of gal and nursed mine until she was almost 3.

When I first put Kayley into a toddler bed (around 20 months), I would sit and rub her back-at first she would go crazy, scream NURSEEEEEEEEEEEEE NURSEEEEEEEEEEEEEE NURSEEEEEEEEEEEE, I would sit with her and do anything I could to distract her. Eventually, I put a little portable DVD player in her room with her favorite DVD in it and left her laying watching that until she fell asleep. I know-it wasn't ideal, but it worked. I had the same problem-if I was nearby, she wanted to nurse, and would bang her head on my chest, grab my shirt, try to get at my boob in any way she could.

Anyway-good luck! basically, positive distraction when she wants to nurse is what worked the best for us.

Wear a snug shirt to bed when you put her down and let her cry till she falls to sleep next to you..it won't take long...She'll get tired of reaching and grabbing for what she can't have and will be mad and cry of course but she'll get it. I actually cut the night feeding first with my son at 18 months and he learned to fall asleep without as long as mom was there.

I have to admit though that mitchell still sleeps with me and he is 2 and a half. But it was sure nice to get my boobs back though. :)
C.

hehe i promise this wont be long :)
i weened my daughter at about the same age. at first i would try my best to tire her out during the day, then about 15 min before bed we would sit on the couch and cuddle while she had a warm bottle (or sippy cup) of milk. then she would get a warm bottle of water and we would lay down in her room together till she knocked out. when we first started this routine we would do it every 3rd day, we did that for about 2 weeks, and then steped it up to every other day, after a couple more weeks we went to nursing only every 3rd day and soon after that only nursing when she was paticularly upset or simply couldnt go to sleep. it took about 2 months to compleetly ween her.
also when we started this process we put a fan, a nightlight and a radio set to NPR in her room every night (white noise helped keep her asleep) around the last 2 weeks of weening the days we were not nursing she would get tucked in like a big girl hugs and kisses from us her warm water and we would leave the room for her to fall asleep on her own. at first it didnt work every time and i would go in to lay with her but gradually she adjusted.
now we are breast free and she goes to sleep 95% of the time without us there, she still has her nights where we may have to lay with her untill she is asleep but they are pretty few and far between.
hope that helps, good luck :)

Hi J..
My son is almost 15 months old and we're also starting the weaning process. I'm kind of the reverse of you though...he's actually going to bed at night ok without nursing (however, I still nurse him, he just won't fall asleep like he used to) but not naps!
For bedtime, there was actually one night I was struggling to get him to sleep after he wouldn't fall asleep nursing; I ended up just laying him in his crib, and I laid down next to it and he fell asleep! There have been a few nights where it's taken him 5-10 minutes of thrashing around, but he's been falling asleep in his crib (albeit with me standing right there!) on his own when he won't fall asleep nursing.
He can always fall asleep with his dad though, so I think that we'll probably just begin doing that when I'm ready to quit nursing him before bed. So maybe you have someone else who could help you put her to sleep until she gets used to not nursing to sleep? I'd try just laying her down, too, but I'm assuming you're like me and won't leave her to just cry. It's worth a try though, I couldn't believe when my son just fell asleep on his own that first night! You never know what they're going to surprise you with!
Good luck though, you'll have to let me know what works! We're hoping to move our son out of our room here in the next couple months...we're finally moving to a big house where he'll have his own room, so that could be interesting too!

Hello there J.,

I nursed my daughter for 26 months before weaning. I also run daycare in our home. :) Every child is very different and weaning can be a rough time. It sounds like you have a great start though. She's already sleeping in her own bed for a while at night and not nursing much in the day. That's great! I found three things that helped me/us the most while weaning...

One was I found my daughter a new comfort item. I know it sounds strange, but we used a heating pad. Not the electric kind!!!, but the ones that are filled with beans or rice that you put into the microwave to warm. She called it her "warm". I gave it to her for a while instead of nursing her with her milk or water in a cup.

Another, was distraction, distraction, distraction! Read her favorite book, find a snack, sing a song instead of nursing. Anything to turn her attention away from it. Eventually, I found my daughter forgetting that she wanted to nurse. The time in between just grew longer and longer, until she was all done.

Another thing that helped me A LOT, was simply talking to other Mom's that I know, about their experiences weaning a child of the same age. Many of my friends weaned their children much earlier. So, it helped just hearing different experiences. I called my Mother, my Aunt, and a family friend.

I hope that some of this helped.

Good luck!

~C.

I weened my son at 17 months. He had been having whole milk at daycare for some time by then, but still nursed at night and when he was upset, much like yolur daughter. What I did with him was I simply quit nursing him. He did fine during the day, but there were a rough few nights while he adjusted. I was living with my mother at the time. So...she would stay up in his room until he was asleep...When he awoke in the middle of the night, I offered him a sippy cup with water in it (he never used a bottle at all) and that was it. He usually declined and was simply upset that I would not nurse him. I held him a lot and told him that I loved him, but I simply refused to nurse him. Once he got the idea that I was not going to nurse him anymore, he was content with me holding him until he fell asleep. Within a couple of weeks he was sleeping all through the night...from bedtime until about 6 or 7am when the sun came up. Good luck to you. It is a difficult thing to do because it makes them feel so unhappy, but you just have to remember that it is for the good of you and your daughter...offering a favorite blanket or stuffed toy to soothe also helps a little.

I weaned my son at 9.5 months when I went back to work part-time. He wouldn't take a bottle during the day and he wanted to nurse off and on all night. On my pediatrician's recommendation I weaned him cold turkey. I just stopped. He did okay during the day, but we had a few really rough nights with a lot of screaming. I stayed with him through those nights to comfort him. He would wake up several times demanding to nurse, scream for awhile, and then fall into a restless sleep. BUT it did only last a few nights - once he realized he wasn't getting anything he quit demanding it. He still wakes up at night, but not to be fed. I hope this has helped some. It may be harder for you since she is older and been nursing longer, though I don't know that for sure. Maybe she will accept it better since she is older.

Hello J.,

What made you decide to breastfeed a baby for 19 months? Also, why is she not sleeping through the night? Does she walk?

You can ween her two ways, the first by using a bottle with one of those nipples that look like a titty. Try this for about a month, but stop that in the middle of the night feeding. Second, start brainwashing her with the sippy cup and the being the 'Big Girl' spiel. You'll probably have to give her a bottle just before she goes to bed. Stop getting in the bed with her. Get a night light, and/or a mobile to hang over the bed, and a big stuffed animal to hug.

Think of this year as the big seperation towards baby's quest to big girlhood! ;) While you're thinking about weening from breast feeding, in the middle of the night feeding, and in the bed with her she's also getting to the age where she should be potty trained. Try to accomplish that at least by the age of two. Good luck! R.

Will she take a bottle with express milk? If so, you could switch from breast to bottle and just pump. I know it's lots of work but it's worth a try. For my 14month old when he was 12months it worked great until I listen to a friend who suggested to cut the breast milk cold turkey. I started substituting with soy instead of breast milk and he decided he would not take a bottle at all. Now i'm back to nursing twice a night. Remember that we are pretty much like homebase for our lil ones. We should make weening a slow transition for them. Now that my son is 14months, although he nurses before bed and at 3am, he nurses for only a couple of minutes. It's more of an emotional feeding for him then being hungry. Best of luck to you. Unfortunately, I'm still nursing.I guess I need help too.