Was She Taken for a Ride?

There are a lot of hungry people in this country right now. People who never would have thought this could happen to them. Scamming? I don't think so.

That doesn't really sound like too much of a scam, since she took the food and was happy about it.

My neighbor recently had a man ask her for money for groceries in front of the supermarket, she did not have cash on her so she asked him to wait and she would be back. She decided to get him a bag of food, stuff for sandwiches and things like that. She went back out and he was very nasty saying he wanted the cash and not food. I told her she did the right thing, I think he was trying to scam people.

My husband once had a guy ask for cash, my hubby asked him what he wanted it for and the guy said to get alcohol/liquor. My hubby gave him a few bucks because he was honest.

I think the lady on the bench found the angel she needed.

Sounds legit. I hope, if I'm ever in a predicament like that, someone as kind and generous as your mother happens along. She's a wonderful role model for us all.

Doesn't sound like a scam to me. She would have come up with another reason why she needed cash and kept changing the reason as long as your mom came up with ways to get around giving cash. I need to get my prescription medication, or pay a Dr bill, or pay electric bill, or bus money, etc. Your mom is a wonderful woman.

I don't know too many people who would buy "discount" bread, milk and cereal from a woman on the street. I'm sure she had a real need for these items.
In my experience (I used to work in San Francisco and would often offer street people food, never money) the scammers are the ones asking for cash for a "bus ticket" or to pay for "medical" or "car" bills, and they will actually get angry if you offer them food instead. It sounds like your mom helped a truly needy person.

Food stamps are rarely really ever enough and they don't buy gas or medicine. You can't brush your teeth on food stamps. You can't get shampoo or personal toiletries.

I think that since she asked for so little and they really were staple things, and did not take cash, that 1) she likely did need it and 2) your mom should rest easy that she did something nice for someone else.

I think it was a legitimate need. The sad part is that this isn't the first time this woman has been in this situation because she knew to take the bus to a nicer part of town where people would likely have more money to shop and, therefore, more money to give. She knew where to go to ask for what she needed and most likely get a "yes". She knew to ask a woman, because women are natural nurturers and more likely to say yes.

I think it just looks like she's had to do this before and that's truly sad. Your mom is a great lady and did a really kind thing.

"OR, I guess she could have planned on selling the groceries."

How many people do you know that buy their bread and milk from an 'underground' market. I don't think a bag of groceries has a high resale value.

I think this was a legitimate need and it was very kind of your mom to fulfill that need.

It doesn't matter. Your Mom did a kind thing and if the lady really needed it then your Mom made a huge difference in that other woman's day. If the lady was NOT legit....... then what did your Mom lose? A few bucks?

Your Mom has a place in heaven I'm sure.

I have been amazed lately of how many people are in need so I don't think your mom was scammed. I would have given her a ride home too. :) My daughter said once when I asked if I was scammed. What does it matter? how much is your dignity worth to you? In other words even if they were scamming they needed the money pretty bad

It doesn't matter, your M. did a good deed and it never hurts to feed someone. She would only be scammed if when she went back with the groceries and the woman left because she didn't have cash.

Unfortunately, many people who "pan handle" do so for cash to buy alcohol and/or drugs. This didn't seem to be the case with the woman your mother encountered.
It seems that a few groceries really were a God-send to her and I think your mother should be glad that she was gracious and helped her out.
I bet that woman will never forget her.
It was a mitzvah.
Your mom should rest happy that she was there for someone in need.

Just my opinion.

I think what your mom did was wonderful, and probably legitimate. What a nice thing, to actually have eye contact with someone, smile at them, and actually stop and talk to them. That just doesn't happen much anymore!! I would believe that if the woman was scamming your mom, that she would have put up an argument, like, I'll go buy my own groceries, I'll just take the money type thing. And to be honest, who'd buy groceries from the disabled lady, if she was going to sell them? Probably not O. person. I'd just tell your mom she did a good thing - but be careful - a NEVER give anyone a ride home.

I would say it's a legitimate need (regardless of whether or not this woman/mother has "regular" needs - it would appear by what she asked for that her needs were legitimate). NO O. I know would ask for basics if they were able to get them on their own. They would ask for something else or they would turn the offer of food down and just want the money.

I commend your mom.

I'm with Patty - it doesn't matter. Your mom was gracious and kind, as we are to be to others. What they do with that is on them and she shouldn't try to accept any responsibility for it. I would have done the same, had I thought of it.

I think scammers are more likely to ask for money and not bother w/other things that are offered.

I think your mom should rest easy. What she did was very sweet.

I really think this was a legitimate need. She could have asked for more, but stuck to this, hesitantly adding only Cheerios to her request.

And I am impressed that she admitted to your mom that she does this from time to time, coming here and asking people for help. She could have lied. That's another reason I don't think that she is scamming.

Your mom can sleep well tonight, not worrying about if she slammed the door on this woman.

Sweet woman, your mom!

Dawn

I agree with everyone. It doesn't matter if she was scammed. That woman isn't going to go buy booze or drugs with her milk and cereal. It is going to feed her and her family. Your mother did a lovely thing, and what the other woman does with it is on HER. Your mother is worried now that she was taken for a ride - she shouldn't be. She fed a hungry person. Whether the person really needed the food or not isn't actually the issue.

I too would be inclined to think that it was legit since she accepted the groceries rather than insisting on money. I mean, who would she sell bread and milk and cereal to if she wanted the money instead? How much money could she be expected to get for them? But at the same time, if you are low-income, there are other options besides the food bank - if you qualify for food stamps, you can use that toward almost any food/beverage items in the grocery store. Maybe she really doesn't need the help, and telling a sad story and getting people to buy things for her rather than her spending her own money to buy them is still her getting something for nothing. I suppose it didn't hurt anything for your mom to help but like others have said, it would be interesting to see if the same woman is still there tomorrow or next week.

who knows....only God knows.

So what does it matter? Your mom helped someone out. That is a good thing. Would I have done it? Yes. We've had this discussion before.

Could it have been a scam? Maybe. Could the girl be in dire straits? Maybe.

I would let it go. If she sees her there next time and does the same thing - well - we know it's a scam. But your mom did what many of us do - give with her heart.

It doesn't seem like she was taken...but please make your mom aware that she is never to give money to anyone or have them follow her to her bank to get any. Also...never give anyone a ride anywhere. The elderly is preyed upon...be very cautious out there. Please warn her!

I would say the lady was legit. If she wasn't she wouldn't have just asked for 3 things and hesitant on the third item.

O. time my mom and I was just leaving from grocery shopping. There was a guy standing there with a sign that asked for food or money for food. ( this was before we had them on every corner) I had just gotten our tax return back and had the extra money on me. Mom and I seen how much we had and we agreed if he really needed the groceries we would get him $100 worth. We pulled up to him and asked if he needed some food, he said yes. I told him I only had a few dollars on me but was willing to take him shopping. He said that he would take the few dollars and go himself. With that I handed him $2 and drove away. He didn't need the food, he wanted the money. Both of us agreed if he was honestly desperate enough to stand on a corner for food he would have gladly taken us up on taking him shopping. The next weekend we went shopping again and he was sitting again with the same sign... only this time he was a few blocks away, again by a grocery store.

Makes you wonder though how many really are that desperate and who is just out for the money. Either way its sad.

I never question a good deed....your mom sounds like a wonderful person, leave it at that

Sounds legit since she was greatfull for the stuff. And even if she wasn't legit, your mom did a wonderful thing. :)

I don't think it sounds like a scam. The woman asked for 3 staples. She didn't give a whole unreasonable list (ice cream, cookies, lots of fruit, filet mignon, etc). It was milk and bread. I am humbled by your mother's kindness and generosity.

I would say legit. Once I had saw a woman holding a sign for money. I didn't have any cash, but when I went to the store I bought some water, and a few food items. It wasn't much because we were pretty broke at that time too. When I gave it to her, she was grateful and told me every little bit helps. I think those people are not scammers, just the ones who turn up their noses at food and just take cash.

We have a family that lives right off a busy highway, and they sit in their front lawn on lawn chairs holding up a sign asking for money. Yeah, those people won't be getting anything from me.

I'm guessing the woman is legit. She asked for some basic food items, nothing extravagant, did not take advantage of your mother by asking for more, didn't even ask for a ride home, even though it was probably difficult to carry the extra groceries your mom bought her. She was forthright about taking the bus there and asking people for money and food when she needed it. It's a tough economy, many food banks are low on supplies and this woman may have found this a better way to get what she needs.

I don't think the woman makes millions reselling the bags of milk bread and cereal she gets from people like your mom :) Probably very few people give her anything, and if they do, it's not a lot. Now, if the lady had gotten your mom to give her the credit card info or pulled the old 'bump into her while someone else lifted her wallet'........or maybe a kingpin is pimping these ladies out all over the nation and......nah. Your mom did the right thing. I was a bit terrified when you said your mom would have given her a ride though-eeek. Unfortunately for the needy, there are too many dangerous people out there preying for that to be an option.

honestly, I would send your mom a "thank you for being an angel" card.

My question would be: why didn't the lady go to the store with her?

You do what's in your heart and don't worry about it. And I think it's doubtful that she would have scammed a few dollars of groceries. Probably not a big black market for cheerios. A kid approached my dad a couple years ago (probably thinking an elderly man was an easy target) and told him he was hungry and had no money. My dad told him he'd meet him at the Burger King across the street and get him whatever he wanted for lunch. The kid never showed. That's what a scammer would do.

legitimate, and your mom rocks!
khairete
S.

My grandfather was an old school reverend. And he used to say that if you give from the goodness of your heart, to someone who is lying to you, "good for you, but shame on THEM"

You never know if who you are helping is truly in need. But to give to someone who you think is, makes YOU the better person, with a good soul and a good heart. That's where it should end. We have to be cautious of others out there, but in situations like you described, your mom did a great thing. And I doubt she was being scammed. But if she was, she won't be the O. losing any sleep at night, or avoiding mirrors lol i would've done the same thing.

I think it was real need.
Back in Mexico, many years ago but I am sure still happen (saddly), a few times I saw little kids asking for money, sometimes I didn't have cash or I suspect (as is well know) that in many cases they have a grown up that is waiting for the money for "something" else.
I would offer them food instead.
You have no idea how many of them said no the food regard that they were obviously were poor and most likely hungry.
It was hard to decide what to do because I wonder if I give them money who ever takes the money could keep sending them on the streets, but either way they may get a benefit, sometimes I gave them others just walk away with a terrible feeling and a doubt.
Another occasion it was a mother in the floor, with 2 small kids asking for money and a baby nursing (or at least look lik it was) she ask for money for food, instead of money I offered a job, she said no, she didn't even ask what was the job. Don't ask me what I would do if I needed to take my kids off the street and feed them, so I was kind of upset she didn't even ask what it was.
Anyway, what I am saying is that this women was asking for food, not for money, kind of hard to sell food on the streets, I think.
Your mom did a very nice thing but I am glad she didn't offer to take her and she needs to be careful, no stop being nice but careful.

Your mom sounds like a fantastic, wonderful woman -- wow!

In a way, I don't think it really matters whether it was a scam. Your mom acted out of a spirit of pure goodness. Thinking about whether it's a scam is likely to stay her hand the next time she encounters a person in need -- and honestly, most needs are legitimate. Even if -- absolutely worst-case scenario -- it was a scam, and the woman on the bench was supporting a drug habit or something, your mom probably helped protect somebody else from theft or something. So it was a wonderful act, by a wonderful person, no matter what.

On the surface, I don't think it was a scam. Another thing to consider is that most stores allow you to return items for less than like $10 (as an example) without a receipt. If she were an addict, she could return the items to get a few bucks to get another hit. However, I think that is a stretch. I'd be surprised if that was going on. But you right, stuff like that can happen.

Kudos to your mom for being a blessing!