Waldorf Family- Looking for Advice on Controlling Media Influences.

My daughter is 10 and 1/2 and was raised in montessori school

I took out the TV when she was born.

She get some TV when she is at friends, relatives etc

She plays violin, is in a theater troupe, and an artist

that's how she accompanies her time

I never cared what others think

When I was 5 my parents got rid of the TV. I have 3 younger sisters and my parents enrolled us all in music, dance, swimming and also we had to do household chores. Any other time we had, we did homework and made up our own entertainment. We were taught to play card games, sew, cook and other fun stuff.
We didn't have time to watch TV. The only TV I saw was when I was at my friends house or at relatives. I think it was a good influence not to have it around.
My mom stayed home full time.
Tell your in-laws that your children will be learning valuable life lessons without the distraction of TV. I know I appreciate my parents for doing it and so do my sisters. Plus I know how to preform more tasks than anyone I know.
I am a computer technican(my profession), a mechanic, seamstress, cook, home repair person etc etc etc.
Hope this helps.

I too am raising my daughter as much in the Waldorf perspective as possible. Right now we cannot afford to replace all our plastic toys to wood, but hae nothing electronic anymore. She misses tv sometimes, but she doesn't watch more than a tiny bit of tv in a week, and that is usually something like Riverdance or a home movie. We attend the current playgroup at the Housatonic Valley Waldorf School in Newtown, CT, and love it. I am also looking for people that are like minded just to chat with. It's nice to find you here!

Congratulations on making a tough decision in today's world and sticking to it. I know that I probably don't limit my kids tv time enough, but I am very careful of what they watch and always watch with them. They will never have tv in their rooms or computers, eventhough their cousins do. I have always found that telling people a simple 'I don't think that is appropriate for my kids' has been enough for me. You are the parent and you get to decide what is appropriate for your kids. There are many things I would like to watch that just aren't good for an almost 4 and a 10 onth old to watch, so we don't. I just wish I was doing as good as you keeping the influences out of my kids lives. Keep it up, and don't worry about explaining. You know you're doing what is best for you family.
D.

personally, i am surprised that you would need to defend this lifestyle. i am jealous that you have the patience and resources to do this, maybe that is where some peoples negativity is coming from. i cant imagine anyone truly believes that cartoon network is better for their kids than a project with mom- (tho i am guilty of it all too often). try to be with others who share your philosophy. i would think your in laws have something to say about it because they may not know how to keep children entertained in other ways (either their energy level, or lack of ideas). maybe offering fun suggestions or fun outings they could do with your kids could help.

We also limited TV viewing when our children were small. We encouraged reading, playing board games and just plain old non eelectronic activities. I never tried to defend my philosophy. When they went to the grandparents, they watched a lot of TV, but then grandparents are supposed to spoil their grandkids. IN fact, my father ordered the Disney channel and we didn't even have cable.

To be honest with you, I am also not raising my son around the influence of TV, and I was raised in a boarding school, which limited one hour of TV per week (although we were too busy with the other activities to watch it), and on the weekends were stict hours, from 8pm-9pm, and once again, we were too busy with other activities. My older sister also raised my niece and nephew on stict one hour of TV a day (they are 13 and 16), and they've told their in-laws: we didn't have TV 100 years ago, and people turned out fine, and that always usually ends the discussion. What I do, which is through the love and logic parenting styles, www.loveandlogic.com, when my son is older, is that when he is at his grandparent's house, they have a different set of rules that I have. I've also brought the educational tapes that I would prefer them to play, and it always works out fine. I purposely do not have cable so that my son is being raised without being used to it, and he gets to watch an hour a day or sesame street. My daycare provider is the same way, she does not have the TV on at all, only at the end of the day between 4pm-5pm when parents are picking up the children, she puts on Barney. (My son goes to a home daycare.) She spends time doing projects with them, and doesn't like the influence of TV. Waldorf Family, you are doing a great job because as a child who was raised without TV, I tell you the truth, I can think critically, I love to read, and my brain was developed in a different way to think for myself. Not to say those people who were raised as TV for their babysitter can't think for themselvs, but I can definitely see the difference. Good luck! I hope that I didn't offend anyone who reads this.

S.,
We all want what is best for our children. I believe greatly restricting the junk TV & other media offers is a must. If I were you I would probably print out some info for my in-laws to read on the Waldorf philosophies. Then maybe while watching something on TV (most likely with out the children) would point out & discuss the issues & ideas that are shown in even a 1/2 hour of programing, things that young children should not be aware of never mind being forced to dwell on because of the character in the show.
As far as raising your girls in this mixed up society--- I would seek out groups of people in your area that believe the way you do & socialize with them. I believe there are quite a few schools that profess to be "Waldorf Schools". If there is one near you I'm sure they have plenty of others that have gone through what you are going through & they would be willing to give you a few good one liners to satisfy most people's questions.
One I have used when asked if it would be ok if our kids can watch a video (when at friends or familys homes) I say something to the effect of "No we came here to visit & play, but if you are already bored we can go home." I know it sounds almost rude but there have been very few that have asked more than once because (after a conversation sparked from that comment) they finally understood our feelings concerning media.

S.,
You shouldn't have to explain or defend your methods of raising your children. My mother thinks most of my methods are wrong, but I basically told her it was my decision to make and she was just going to have to respect that. You know your children better than anyone and you know what's best for your family!

T.

Hi S., I've never heard of the Waldorf philosophies but I too am limiting my children's television viewing, allowing them to play w/ non-electronic toys....no video games, game boys. At this point they are not even allowed to touch our computer. They spend alot of time outside playing, using their imaginations and their muscles. So far, they are happy and incredibly healthy. They don't realize they are missing anything. We have other friends who also encourage outside play and discourage tv viewing. Their children are 10 and 12. They don't even have cable. I find that their children are some of the most well-balanced, well-rounded children I know. As for defending your decisions to friends and family, you really shouldn't have to. These are your children and this is the way you've chosen to raise them. End of conversation. I think you'll find that as your kids get older, you may not encounter the same problems that other parents do who don't moniter or curtail their children's tv viewing habits. I encourage you to stay on the track you're taking. Good for you. I wish more parents felt the same way we do! T.

Hi S.
We also raise our children Waldorf. Our daughter (our oldest)will begin her first year of kindergarten at the Waldorf school in Lancaster this year. We're so excited!

In our house the TV is located at the back of the house and because of the stairs is gated off. So our kids don't even see the screen while they play. Sort of an out of sight out of mind thing. That said they do occasionally watch it but only once a day and for a limited amount of time and not every day. Mostly they play in the living room or outside.

When our kids are at their grandparents house we ask that they don't watch more than one video and that it's one we aprove for them. I wish they had better choices at their house but we deal with it. The grandparents do sit and watch it with them and everyone gets a rest.

Occasionally we get handouts from the school that we copy to the grandparents. That seems to help them understand a little.

again, way to go! my kids are still pretty young, 2.5yrs and 9months. for the first two years of my sons life we had a strict no tv policy. we got rid of cable and even the tv for a bit. now he's two and we allow him to watch videos, about an hour or two a week in very small time increments. no commercials allowed. my 9month is still on the no tv policy. i thought it would be hard to go tv free all day every day (i'm a stay at home mom), it wasn't. my friends tease me - i believe its good natured - and my family tries, but they're tv heads. sometimes i feel they could be learning from some programs but it makes me try to remember to sing the abc's a few more times that day or count the grapes on his plate. my biggest issue is that the marketing on everything you see in the stores is from tv! how in the world my son figured out who sponge bob square pants is i'll never know. in the end, my husband and i notice that my son is mellow (could be who he is), he plays by himself for hours, and he rarely asks for things in the store even if spongebob is on the box.