Ugh..what Have I Done? Neighbor Quandry.

We enjoy a house or yard full of kids MOST of the time. If you have ever really been "that house" on the block then it goes without saying there are times when you just have to say no.
I promise children do not take offense, they are not like adults. Just say it's family time right now but you'd love to see their sweet little faces later or tomorrow or whenever.
The only way being the "block parent" will work is if you're honest and direct. If you don't speak up and let them know when it's time to go home you'll end up resenting the fact that you have to be responsible for other people's kids when you really don't feel like it.
Enjoy being the house of choice, it is such a great thing in so many ways!

tell the boys that they can come back later that its family time right now

two words to the kids......FAMILY TIME!!!!!!!!tell them they can come play another day:)

I don't think you will be 'that' mom for wanting family time in your own back yard once in awhile. Go to park? Really? Anyway, I agree with most posters. Next time just say oh hey guys we are having family time right now. 'Johnny' can play in two hours or see you tomorrow for play time .

When the kids come over and it is not a good time for you send them home. Hi Joey no the kids can't play with you right now. How about I call your mom when they are available. Do this a few times and it will work it self out.

Get a dog, use the dog as an excuse to put up a fence.

I understand wanting quality time with your kids but welcoming the neighbor kids to play too will help to keep your kids home and under your watchful eye. Talk to the other Moms and tell them their kids are welcome to come and play a few times a week. Invite the other Moms also. The kids can play and you can get some Mom time talking to the other Moms. Explain your house and yard rules and trade off providing a snack for everyone.

Just tell them (the adults) that you are so glad their kids come over to play...especially during the week but would just like to request that on the weekends they check with you first to be sure your not trying to have "family time" while your hubby is home.

Another option would be to say nothing and once they arrive say, "Sorry guys, today isn't a good day. You can come back tomorrow"

We can't have ENOUGH kids at my house. Usually I have a straggler or two or THREE for dinner with us. That's the way neighborhoods work, remember?
I don't see how on Earth this could possibly be perceived as "taking advantage"? You invited them!
Seriously, do you want to be "that" mom?
If you want uninterrupted time with your kids--go to the park! LOL
When it's "over", it's OVER. Just say "you guys are going to have to go home now, we're going in..."

I know what you mean. When my kids were younger, I didn't let them go over anyone else's house and preferred for the neighborhood kids to come here. The only problem was that when we'd just want to have a cookout or a fire pit out back all the neighborhood kids would show up...I didn't want to feed them all, and sometimes I just want to spend time with MY KIDS, to talk to them about their day and discuss family stuff/issues. If neighborhood kids were over all day because we were outside, I'd start to get annoyed. Now that they are older it's much easier.
If I were you I wouldn't feel bad about asking the kids to go home because you are going to spend some time with your kids or because it's lunch/dinner time. Or you could even ask them to come back in an hour because...it would be a better time for you!

You just need to send them home when it is not convenient. Nothing wrong with saying hey guys our kids can't play right now. I was always the koolaid house when my kids were growing up. Like you would rather they be in our yard than somewhere else. But your family time is just that. tell the kids your kids can't play right now but will come get them when they can. and don't worry about it. you might want to consider getting the couple pieces of gate to enclose your yard lol.

Lol, i have to answer a pposter, Yes i want my kid not to play with their friends when i want to be in my back yard without the neighbors.

So yes, i want to be able to keep an eye on my kids but no i don't want to have to spend my whole day babysitting/referring/waitressing the entire neighborhood.

I think you realize now that what you said in trying ot be nice was too open ended. I would think just dealing with the kids and saying, come back in an hour or let's play tomorrow Today i have other things i want to do. Is probably your best bet. I think unless the mom's are hanging out iwth you and really laid back they might take it wrong if you approach them and say it was too much,

Maybe they won't care but probably better to just send the kids home or suck it up for 20 mins. Be firm with the kids too about your rules, no pushing, no bullying, no swearing. etc.

I loved being the home where everyone congregated. I don't see how this is a problem. Would you rather your kids play somewhere else or just not play with their friends?

You tell them, in a "humorous" way.
That... you still need to be asked first, if it is okay.
Basically, they took it as, that you are play-date central and the other Mom's kids are going to be sent there whenever, your boys are outside.

You HAVE to clarify... and say that you didn't realize what you were saying.

We have a neighbor... and our kids go there to play. They have a dog. We don't. BUT... the neighbor always says... that ONLY if my Husband is there WITH them, they can come over...and that they CANNOT come over by themselves. Basically because, my Husband is not often home (smart neighbor) or is only home in the evenings after work... so the neighbor knows that even if my kids go there, it will not be for a long haul because they need to go home soon for dinner.
AND... the neighbor only lets them come over, IF they have already finished their homework etc.

You NEED to clarify with the neighbors.
And speak up.
Just make it humorous, so they don't get irked.

Bottom line is:
Your house, your rules.
TELL the kids.... "you can only stay for 20 minutes." End of story.

fences make the best neighbors....

since you haven't stood up for yourself, they will continue to take advantage of you. You gave an open invitation. You didn't put the caveat on it that it wasn't to happen ALL the time...so they assumed, inferred, or just plain took advantage of "every time" even though you didn't say it.

put up a fence.