UGH!!! Help...spoiled, A Phase, Do I Ignore This Behavior???

I firmly believe that you can not spoil a baby. Is this all the time? Couple of ideas, teething--ear infection--tummy ache.

I'll say it once, I'll say it twice and everyday in my life. You can't spoil an infant.
Some might say at 9 months they know how to manipulate. Sure some of the uber smart might, but 90% of under age 1 babies don't know how to manipulate.
Like the other mom's have said, get a sling, wrap, carrier. Makes life a thousand times easier. Dad's really need to stop saying things like "Your spoiling the baby" they really don't get it. If they were at a SAHD, then yeah they can say what they want. But nothing boils my blood more than people that talk about what they don't know.
My son was the same way. I held him till his he didn't want to anymore. Now he is a normal toddler. He loves him time, and he loves mommy time. He's not spoiled, developmentally delayed or anything else. Do what you feel like you need to do to keep your family happy :D

At nine months, a baby is intensely curious and wants to be up where the big people are, and in on the action. I'm sure he loves it that you hold him, but I'll bet the main attraction right now is that it gets him up where he can see what's going on. This is completely normal – kids are wired to learn by watching, listening, and imitating. (I have heard that in cultures where the adults spend much of their time sitting on the ground, kids don't clamor to be held. They are already at the level where everything is happening.)

So, will a sling work for you, at least some of the time? How about putting his high chair right next to where you're working, and if you are cooking, for example, give him a pan, a wooden spoon, and some dry spaghetti noodles to "cook" alongside you. My grandson loved being part of the action. When he's able to stand safely, he can use a stool to see what you're doing.

If you pick him up every time he cries, you are indeed teaching him to scream. He gets rewarded for the behavior. Grownups call that dynamic spoiling. So, I agree with the moms who say you can't spoil a baby (make him go rotten), but you can definitely teach him how to get the results he wants. So mix it up sometimes. Get him up high so he can see the action BEFORE he starts screaming. And occasionally, when he screams, put in earplugs and quietly go on with your work. When YOU are ready to pick him up, wait for a pause in his wailing, then pick him up.

But he sounds like a bright and curious boy. This is a great time to introduce him to all sorts of activities, foods, and words while he's up with the tall people. He'll drink it up.

Separation-Anxiety.

Ignore your Husband's comment. He just can't deal with it. As most men.

But sure you can encourage your son... have him on the floor to play, you can be close by, and verbally soothe him etc.

At this age it is separation anxiety and the concept of "Object Permanence." It is developmental based. Look it up online.
Your baby is not "spoiled."
He is a baby.
He is bonded with you.

Is he over-tired? Hungry? Teething?
When babies are these things, they get more clingy. With Mommy.

I have an 8 1/2 month old son, while he isn't as bad in the screaming department, when I am in the room he has to be with me. I only have 2 so clearly he is my youngest. I have been told that instead of picking him up to hold him, get down on the floor on his level. Also, sometimes when I am just too busy to deal (and I know that sounds bad) I get my daughter to play with him. Get him used to attention from other people other than his mommy.

"Spoiled"? Not necessarily. All kids are different and maybe this O. just needs more "mom" than the others did? Not sure.

Put him in a sling and take all three kids for a walk. No, he isn't spoiled, he wants his mommy. There's nothing wrong with giving a 9 month old what he needs. You'll get through this and be onto the next stage soon of chasing after a running toddler who doesn't want to stay by your side for more than 2 seconds at a time ;)
In the mean time, after you pick him up and soothe him, you can try getting down on your hands and knees and playing crawling chase with him. Get really silly and let him see you having fun, chances are his big brothers will get in on the game too. Catch him and blow rasberries on his tummy, then turn and see if he'll chase you. Play peek a boo with a blanket, then graduate to playing from around a corner or behind a door. He'll get the hang of not being on your hip all the time when he sees how much fun he can have on the floor!

Sorry I know that is really hard. My son went through this phase and I just started wearing him around the house and going about my business. 9 mo is really too young to spoil. :) Good luck, remember it will all be better soon.

he is still very small, wear him in a sling, this will make him content and you can get things done, and no, this will not make him more "spoiled", that's a myth! some babies just need to be held more, my daughter was like that, I carried her ALL the time (it was great!), I would hear people say she will ALWAYS want to be held and be a late walker etc.. etc... Well, my daughter was fully walking at 11 months, and then RAN from me! Once she was walking, her needs for Mommy were history! I have to admit, sometimes I miss the sling days!! Good luck :)

I come from a long line of baby trainers. My third was a terror from 6 months. My relatives were all telling me she was getting rebellious etc with her fits and I knew they were right, but my other 2 didn't start that until 18 months and were not nearly as tough and angry as her. She was the one that perfect strangers would look at and say, "Oh, that's your troublemaker, huh? You can see it in her eyes." She also did that "my life is coming to a grisly end" rage-ful super screaming when I didn't carry her at all times. She also did it at random at home, in stores, wherever. There was no keeping her happy.

The last straw came at 9 months when she turned red and started screaming and pummeling me in he face while I was holding her talking to someone at the gym (which she didn't feel like letting me do) when she was happy moments before when I picked her up. She was full, dry, and it wasn't nap time. She quieted down as soon as we walked away, and then started again when we got to her car seat-which she did not feel like being put into.

I started firm, calm, consistent discipline thereafter (if you want details let me know) and by about 15 months she had control of her temper. Now at 2 she's super sweet. She still has the fiery temper, and she's extremely devious and smart, but she does not tantrum or manipulate with crying anymore. She has much more mature ways of manipulating us since that isn't allowed :)

There is a difference between how you treat raging screaming at you for things he doesn't approve of, and how you treat his screaming because he wants to be held. They both can be disciplined though. Meanwhile, be sure you are holding him and carrying him around enough (sounds like you are) so your discipline is clear to him and he's not just frantically fighting against a lack of attention in general. On the times he is being quiet, be sure to go over and hug and snuggle him so he sees that being quiet gets your attention too. (but that's not enough to stop the screaming other times).

Have you considered teaching him sign language so that he can communicate what he wants/needs without screaming?

How is he for his Dad if you're not around? If he is happy for Dad when no mom in sight than the solution is obvious, you need to get out a LOT more and leave him home with Dad so he gets out of this habit! Tell Dad how necessary this is

i carried my dau around a lot and now she is 20 months and i wish she could play by herself a little better.........

I wore my children in a sling. That way they are with you at all times, comforted because they are close, but exposed to everything you do all day long. For me it was ideal. I could even nurse while taking a walk! The child can sit up or lay down in the sling. At this age I do not think you can spoil, you are building his confidence by making him feel safe that you are there.
I would also put my kids in their bouncy seat on the island in the kitchen when I was cooking. It was safer than wearing them but they were still close. Mind you, both my kids were happy to sit and did not walk until 14 months, so they were perhaps slow movers. I would do whatever makes your life easier and him happy. Enjoy your little guy. My "babies" are already 11 and 14 and it seems like yesterday they were babies.