Tween Girl Scared to Grow Up

my 12 year is going through this right now. She states I wish we never got old.
I think it is normal and now reading the responses I am glad I am not the only one going through it.
She was super worried I would quit singing to her before bed. I still do. When she wants me to stop I will stop. :)
I loved all the responses.
Good luck to you and many blessings

Can you get her to talk about what exactly she is afraid of? Then maybe you can talk to her more about it.
If it's the physical changes, maybe she needs more information (a good book or two, like the American Girl books?).
If it's dealing with boys/relationships, maybe she needs to talk more about that stuff.
If she feels like she's struggling academically, maybe a tutor?
Is she afraid of losing her closeness with you, her mom? Maybe you can find a way to connect and give her something lasting (by that I mean something that she can look at/read when she's feeling insecure to remind herself of how much she's loved). I just recently started a private blog (meaning no one can see it but me and my kids) where I write down all the fun/funny things that make me love my kids so much. Maybe you could do something like this an share it with her, so she feels more secure?

Some kids get this way and I think most all do even if they don't talk about it. It's pretty scary especially in our present culture with so much hype. It's part of growing and grieving for the lost of childhood and the relationship she has now.

Assure her that she'll always be your little girl and how much you love her and why she is so special to you.
Sometimes kids will go from being very childish/babyish to being as if they're older. Often they're trying out what they think it is to be an adult and then acting out what they sometimes wish they were as a small child, the comfort, the innocence, the love.

Even when kids are seven or eight or nine they go through this kind of thing in some way. They know they're heading towards being older and losing that sweet heavenly feeling of all is good and right in the world. They notice that things are not quite what they thought it was.

I recall that age...I did everything I could to hide my maturing body....but I got over it by the time I was in 8th grade. It is a really hard "inbetween" age where you aren't a kid anymore, but you're not grown up either.
My dd is 11 and still carries her teddy bear around the house (not when friends are over) and she seems to be afraid of growing up too.
I think it will all resolve in time....They really do mature emotionally as they grow up. Don't rush it.

My granddaughter just turned 10 a while back. I found her crying one day not too long before her birthday, not wailing but just teared up. I asked her what was wrong and she said:

"I'm going to be double digits now"...geesh!!!!!

Our daughter was also a bit worried about growing up. She was afraid if making mistakes. She said she was going to miss us when she got old.

I just told her she would always be our girl. I recall we had no idea she could read. When I asked why she had not old us, she said she was afraid we would quit reading to her. I promised we would never quit reading to her and hoped she would also read to us.

I think my daughter (11) has a fear of what is coming. We have a very open line of communication with the changes of life, and since she is a dancer she sees girls half naked getting changed for routines often enough. She knows what will come and I think the whole thought scares her, but she is okay. She knows she can talk to me if she ever needs to.

In the meantime, I cherish our coffee dates, shopping trips, mani/pedi spa days, just talking, whatever it is. Letting her know I am there for her always, will always love her no matter what, and am there for her when times are hard seems to give her some confidence.

Fear is a normal part of life. You help her by accepting the fear and reassuring her that she is ok and will continue to be ok as she grows.

Is her fear specific to certain things. My mother helped me by encouraging me to talk and telling me about her life growing up. She answered my questions even when I didn't verbalize them.

what is most important is to feel secure in your love.

Let her be the child that she wants to be. What does she need to feel secure? Dolls? Buy them.

Support her. She will out grow this if not pushed and made to feel bad.

Looking forward to the answers. I have an almost 12 year old boy that gets a little sad sometimes, when he thinks of growing up. Other times he is so gung-ho!