Tween Girl Birthday Party in winter...Y Swimparty? Invite Boys and Girls?

Both my kids have had and have attended swim parties with snow on the ground. Indoor pools are warm and fun and well supervised. And yes, I don't see the problem with inviting boys, even as a tween. My daughter doesn't have any close friends who are boys, but my son has friends who are girls. It would be wrong to exclude them just because of their gender. I think it's unfair to exclude close friends on the chance they might have romantic feelings. It does happen at this age, but it also happens they can just be innocent friends.

And in terms of 12 or 2:30, it's really about whether you want to serve lunch or not. If it was 12, I'd serve pizza in addition to snacks and cake. At 2:30, I wouldn't.

ETA: Invite the whole class? I can't imagine inviting the whole class at this age. I would pick 6 to 10 of her closest friends and be done. Don't pass out invites at school, though - that's rude if you're only inviting some.

What's wrong with just a few friends and cake/ice cream at home? And what do you mean "she gets teased so much" does she even WANT a birthday party?
Not all kids like parties (I have one of those.)
Let her do what she wants, it's her birthday.
And of course it's okay to invite boys, if those are her friends.
But again, it should be what SHE wants, guest list, venue, etc. (within reason and budget of course.)

We've had a bunch of swimming parties for my kids - 3 indoors and countless summer pool parties. All parties have had kids of both genders, from when they were in pre-school on up through my two who are in high school. Winter swim parties are a blast - it's great to get into a nice warm pool and splash around for a while.

The only downside I can think of at this age is that some kids are self-conscious about their bodies. My kids and their friends were all pretty slender and to my knowledge none of them was uncomfortable at any swim parties but that might be something to consider.

An hour in the party room is probably too long unless there is something else for them to do - I would shorten that by a half hour. If they have an hour in the pool, I would book the party for that hour and then for only 30 minutes before or after in the party room. Most places we've been to do party room first and pool second. Just because they book you for X amount of time doesn't mean that you have to use every minute of it.

Do the 2:30 time slot so that people don't expect you to serve lunch - a party at noon implies that you'll be serving lunch.

ETA: It really is NOT okay to invite boys to a girl's tween swim party! Are any of you even thinking about the kind of situations you are putting these kids in? You have kids with ALL ranges of puberty; boys with hair, no hair, girls who have been told they can shave, some who aren't allowed yet; breasts that are VERY developed, some that are still flat as a board. And you're going to take those kids, put them all in the skimpiest clothing known to man, and make them get wet! Seriously?!?! Man, I feel kinda sorry for your kids! lol! Yeah, sure, it might be okay for the perfectly proportioned girl who hasn't started her period yet. But what about the best friend chubby girl who doesn't look the same in the swimsuit as everyone else? Is it fair to her? There is plenty of time and opportunity for the kids to view the opposite sex in barely any clothing. As I said before, don't push that agenda on your daughter. Please.

Why in the world would you invite boys? Seriously, don't push that agenda on a 10,11 or 12 year old girl. As the parent, you are in control of whether you are allowing that kind of exposure to your daughter. Make a good decision here. My daughter would NEVER attend a b/g swim party between the ages of 10-15. No way.

I work at the Y and we have birthday parties every weekend all winter long. If your daughter wants to invite boys, then invite boys. My sons attend a few of the girls parties. Just make sure you have someone to supervise them in the change room. I would have the party at 2:30, because if you have it at 12:00 people will expect to be fed lunch. At 2:30 in the party room you can just serve snacks and cake. At our Y the kids use the play structure, rock climbing wall and the bouncer when they are done swimming.

I think any party in the winter (other than home) is risky. First I would consider cost factor and what you would lose if you had to cancel due to weather. If that is not an issue. Swimming I guess is ok as long as there is a lifeguard on duty. I would offer lunch, and cake. Girls only. Boys just change the dynamics.

Just my opinion, but I wouldn't include both boys and girls at that age. It creates an entirely different dynamic, because kids are starting to have boyfriends, with girls competing over certain boys and vice versa (I grew up in a small town, pretty sheltered and naive, and even so I remember talking with friends about 'liking' this boy or that boy by 4th grade). Coed events at this age become more about flirting than having fun with the birthday kid. I don't know that there is much risk of bad things happening, but I do think that the kids will not have as much fun because they will be more self-conscious because of the boy/girl dynamic.

I would do 2:30 for a swim party, because noon implies lunch, and my experience this summer with a pool party tells me that giving kids lunch and then having them get in the pool is a bad idea (I had a kid puke at the pool, he wasn't sick, just too much activity right after eating).

I would let the kids swim first, then about 30 minutes before the end of th party have cake and punch. Then let them go. (I actually don't open presents at birthday parties, so there is no comparing among gifts by the kids attending. Plus, really, it's kind of boring for everyone but the birthday kid.)

i think my first coed bday party was when i turned 13. it was halloween/bday party - freakin' blast, i was so excited. :)
but, as a swim party....hmmm, my mom let me have those when i was in high school, end of year party we always got to have.
i don't see anything wrong w/coed as long as well supervised. :)
i think either time is fine, i'm planning my son's bday party and it's at 5:30p, so i already know i gotta provide some type of food. whatever works better, a full on lunch (pizza, etc) or snack (chips, fruit, etc).
and hopefully your baby girl won't be teased....sheesh! hopefully the ppl she invites are her friends that WON'T be teasing her. she does want a party though, right? idk, just double check. good luck whatever y'all do.

I think it is mean to not invite the whole class so unless she goes to an all girl school I'd feel like I should invite the whole class.

The package at the Y covers quite a few kids for that $125. So I'd invite them all at 2:30 so you'd have them between meals.

A swim party would be fun but DO make sure there is a life guard or two on duty. I worked for a city and there was a problem with one of the guests which happened to be the birthday person. I don't want to put a downer on your plans but do be cautious.

The 230 sounds like a good time for the party. That way you have gifts and cake/punch and you're done. If this will not work a party at home with the girls would be nice.

We didn't have parties every year for a child. I think of the special milestone parties. Things have changed much since I was little.

the other S.

PS Your daughter is going to have to learn to grow a tougher skin for the coming years.