Trying for a Second Baby

One of my closest friends had difficulties TTC with her first and she started using fertilityfriends.com, a free charting guide & service and she is now 6 weeks pregnant with her second.

My husband and I are now discussing having another one so I have signed up and began charting as well so if we do decide to have one more I'll have all of the info on hand to know when the best days are to conceive.

Hope that helps!!

J.

M.,
I see you've gotten a lot of responses so what I have to share is not anything exciting or revealing, however, I want to tell you that I would push the doctors or midwives to help you out with this if you in fact what that baby now. There is no reason you should have to wait 8+ months like so many of these women who posted. I pray everything works out right for you. I know how hard it is. I just miscarried a few months ago and tried right away cause I couldn't deal with the loss. It is very common to miscarry after the first or have a harder time to get prg. so you are not necessarily unique in this situation. I don't know why nor does anyone really but be aggressive - you are your own advocate and get that baby on your time table. Good luck. Much blessings and support. You're in my prayers. Make use of today's holiness and pray for another one from G-d too. And ho[pefully it will come soon in your horizon.

I was in the same boat as you back in the Fall. My first daughter was conceived in 2 months. We started trying for our second, and after the 3rd month, I thought something was naturally wrong. We used ovulation kit and everything. My brother told me his wedding date, so I continually had that in my mind too, that I had to conceive by a certain date so I could attend his wedding. After my brother changed his wedding date, and I tossed the ovulation kits and just relaxed, then I became pregnant with my 2nd, and now due in Sept. Everyone says if you think about it too much, you stress yourself out. Also, they said the 2nd child takes longer to conceive (for some reason). Good luck!

Hi,

I'm in the same boat that you are in!! My husband and I have an almost 3 year old son and have been trying for about a year to conceive another. I have had all of the tests that are required to have when the doctors want to make sure that everythng is in working order. This is very common with trying for a second child so everyone has told me. I am currently on my second round of Clomid, whch is a fertility drug that makes you hyper-ovulate, sometimes resulting in twins (only 10% more than a normal twin pregnancy). The odds were not high enough for me to say no. The women that I have discussed using Clomid with and have been successful usually the last month of taking the medication (month 3). The doctors usually put a woman on Clomid for 3 months at a time and then raise thedose if it doesn't work for another three months. I believe you are only able to stay on Clomid for 6 months to a year and then they try another method. Please let me know if you would like to chat or something!!

Been there! 18 months and 2 miscarriages. I would HIGHLY recommend the book, "Taking Charge of Your Fertility". You will be able to tell EXACTLY what your body is doing, if you are ovulating and when, and when you are most fertile.

I too am of "advanced maternal age". I'm 39, and had my last 2 kids since I was 35. I would also HIGHLY recommend the book "What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Premenopause: Managing your hormones between 30 and 50" by Dr. John Lee. Tons of interesting and useful information. I found out with my second miscarriage that I was low on progesterone, so I started myself on a progesterone cream and it was during my 2nd cycle on the cream that I conceived, and am now at 26 weeks. Be cautious of what your doc may advise, only because they simply cannot keep up on all the research and it is most important for you to know your own body and how it works, and to follow your instincts. Secondary infertility is actually more common than primary and with secondary infertility, 6 months is plenty long to look into what's going on. None of this 1-2 years of trying...you obviously can conceive. I pray it works out for you...

Oh, and just a note of caution, when you DO conceive, it will be the most mental pregnancy you could imagine! You will analize EVERYTHING!! :-)

Hello! When I got pregnant with my first and second child, they both happened with birth control being used. With my son Erik who is 4 tomorrow, we decided we were going to try. I thought, ok, go off the pill and I will get pregnant right away. It did not happen, and my periods were very long and heavy because of going off the pill. After trying for 6 mths, we got an ovulation kit, and let me tell you, I swear by them. I was pregnant by month 8. Good luck.

S. Bailey CLD
Aurora
www.tendermomentsdoula.com

HI!
I too was in your shoes not too long ago. We got pregnant with our first child on the 1st try and now when we tried it took 7 months(we recently conceived)! From advice on this website I got a book called Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. It helped me to chart correctly and understand what I was charting! It made me feel like I could understand my body and my cycles. It really helped--and I understand the stress of trying to get pregnant! A trip to your doctor is also great to put your mind at ease! Relax(I know it is hard!)
Good Luck!
L.

It took my husband and I about 7 months to concieve our second child. I too started getting very nervous that something might be wrong. And I desperately wanted a spring baby so we decided to stop trying and wait a while. And what do you know- I got pregnant. I got a late summer baby that is now almost 8 months old. Don't give up. And also per my due date- I ovulated a lot earlier in my cycle than I had thought.

Have you tried those ovulation sticks?

It took me 10 months to conceive and I was only 28 years old. My doctor told me that they won't do any interventions unless you've tried for a over one year. Given your age, a trip to the doctor is the smartest move. An ovulation predictor kit (can be purchased at walgreens) is a great idea in the meantime. Good luck!!!

I could have almost written Linda's post. I was going to recommend TCOYF too. I was 31 when I got pregnant on the first try, but when we started trying again 2+ years later it took about 9 months (and when it finally did take, I thought it was a false alarm and didn't test until day 45!) My cycles had gotten longer and irregular and it was hard to tell when I was ovulating. I understand that the new ovulation predictor kits are really good. But secondary infertility is real, too - it's probably just taking a little longer, but it might be something else. I think it's good to make the appointment and talk to your doctor.

Hi M.,
Just to let you know, when my husband and I tried conceiving a second child it took us 8 months, no particular reason why, but I have noticed that it seems to take longer with the second child. I don't quite understand why but so many mothers I've talked to have had this same experience with the second. If it makes you feel better, my husband and I now have 4 children, number 3 and 4 both came on the first try. I had my fourth at age forty. All are strong healthy children. Sometimes it helps to talk to the doctor and get an exam, but most likely everything will be alright. Good luck to you and try not to worry.

Maurreen

I was very lucky in getting pregnant with mine despite my "advanced maternal age" so while age can be a factor, it hopefully would not be - especially based on your first experience. One thing that made me feel more confident when we were trying was using OPKs - that combined with temping, etc can really help you pinpoint when you are ovulating. Good luck!

I recommned "Taking Charge of your Fertility" also. You can get an understanding of how your cycle works and learn to chart. If there is a problem it makes it very easy to identify. You can take the chart to your doctor and they should be able to go over it with you and see where they could be an issue.
BTW I had trouble in the past with a doc dismissing a chart but they are very effective. If your doc doesn't want to look at it find one who will- my midwife went over mine with me when I was tring to conceive.