Transitioning from Co-sleeping to Crib Sleeping

Updated on March 11, 2010
C.G. asks from New London, CT
19 answers

Hi,
In about a month my husband and I will be transitioning our baby (3 months at that point) from co-sleeping to crib sleeping. Does anyone have any helpful tips?
Thanks,
C.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all so much for your input. I knew when I asked this question that I would probably get a lot of varying responses and I truly appreciate everyone's willingness to share their opinions. My husband and I have decided to see how things go. The little man is currently 2 1/2 months old and is sleeping 5-7 hours straight each night before waking up to feed and I still like the fact that he only has to roll over to me to feed so I think we'll probably continue with the co-sleeping at least for the near future. Thanks again!

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

take what you want from this, but after 7 years, 3 kids later with one on the way, I thought that this article has many good points and can be very helpful to anyone when it comes to having a better understanding whether you've bed shared or not.

http://drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

1 mom found this helpful
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P.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi C.,
I, like you, transitioned my son from co-sleeping to crib when he was 4 months old...he is now 5 months. What really worked great for me was having him take all his naps in the crib, and only co-sleeping his "night" sleep. Then t 4 months i just started putting him in his crib for all sleeps. The first 2 night sleeps he slept less then he did when in co-sleeper, but by the 3rd night back to the schedule he was on while in co-sleeper. Hope this helps and good luck.
Patty S. first time mom

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K.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Your baby is only 3 months!! Why the rush, I could never put a baby that young in a crib. My sister did and the crib was in another room, crazy, cause I would be up all night checking on the baby.
But it did work for her. Everyone is different, we had our little one in the co-sleeper right next to the bed until she could not fit in it anymore, around nine months. Then we did put her in the crib in our room. Now at 2 she makes her way into our bed and we love it. We love waking up to her smiling face.
And no her sleeping with us does not get in the way of sex because the bed is not the only place to do it. There is no law that says your child must sleep alone, dont we like to cuddle why would it be different for a child.
Sorry these arent the tips you may be looking for just something to ponder.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Okay, so I don't know what your feelings are about co-sleeping or how you came to do it, but I think I agree with the first poster. Why are you rushing?

If you never really planned to co-sleep, I would make the change now. Any further along, and it will be tougher. My son and I co-sleep to this day and he's 2 years old. We're in the process of transitioning to a toddler bed, but for us it's no rush. I'm a huge advocate of attachment parenting, and for me part of this is co-sleeping. My son and I have an amazing bond, and it was so much easier to BF him for as long as I did. For me it started when he came home from the NICU after 7 weeks, born 8 weeks early, and it was just natural. He had experienced the warmth and cuddle of the swaddle and incubator for so long and it just seemed cruel to make him sleep somewhere he wasn't comfy.

As for tips, I would gradually work into a bassinet in your room and then to the crib. Funny thing we never actually used the beautiful crib my Mom bought, but it makes an awesome toddler bed. Make sure she's swaddled and in a comfy warm environment, that emulates sleeping in bed with Mom and Dad.

Good luck.

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L.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

Sorry the other posters were so judgemental.
We also moved our daughter into her own room/crib at 3 months and it has worked wonderfully.
She had slept through the night (at least 8 hours) from 4 weeks, so with a monitor, I never had to get up, which was great. Plus, when she started sleeping in her own room, she slept longer and better.
I transitioned her by having her consistently nap in her crib ( I am a SAHM), which she was then familiar with. The move went off without a hitch, and I now have a confident daughter with her own space, that is not dependent on my husband and I to sleep.
We truly believe that we have given her a gift of confidence and independence, and I am so happy that I never had to go through the struggle of bargaining with an older child to get them to sleep on their own, or explaining to a 4 year old that Mom and Dad made a mistake and let them sleep in the bed too long.
Good Luck!
Oh, and by the way I do breastfeed, she just never wanted to eat at night.

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L.A.

answers from San Diego on

Wait. 3 months is not the time to make such a transition. Wait at least a few more months to move your baby away from you. Cribs are a modern invention, and the exact opposite of the way it should be.

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A.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey there! We just recently did this. Here is what we did, and it seemed to work for us. It was a little difficult because our boy was colicky, but this made the transition easier.

1. we set up an evening ritual: warm bath with aromatherapy baby wash at 6:30. get baby dressed and swaddled in warm room with dim lighting (so he knows it's sleepy time - we used a nightlight and space heater). Bottle of breastmilk and very gentle rocking to sleep in baby's room with the lights off and "white noise" in the background. Once baby is asleep we place him in the crib

2. How we have got him to stay in his crib: after we get him dressed and swaddled (we use a sleep sack and a light blankie), we do the above steps in his room. I then place him in his crib legs and feet first, then roll the rest of his body down into his wedge (baby positioner). Once he is in the crib I keep one hand under his head, and one on his body. I keep it there for a minute, then slowly take my hand from his head. I leave my hand on his chest for another minute or two until he is out. Then I slowly walk away and shut the door almost all the way.

3. It sounds gross, but I rubbed his "puddle pad" on my body to give his crib my smell. He is a very attached baby so this helped to fool him into thinking I am there. I have also secreted breast milk and rubbed it onto his blanket before. That helps also.

4. Try to keep the house quiet for the first few months while the baby is sleeping. Then you can slowly introduce a louder sleeping environment.

This has all worked for us. Hope it helps you! Good luck!

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Co sleeping (or not) is a very personal choice and I would not try to sway you one way or the other. However the one thing I will say is that if you are breastfeeding long term it is SO much easier to have baby in the room with you!! What about a compromise? Baby is not IN your bed, but right next to your bed! We used a co-sleeper bed that is like a big bassinet that hooks right to the side of your bed and is level with your bed. It can be used up to 30 pounds so depending on baby's weight it could be used for quite a while yet. We used it for both my boys up to almost a year. The thing really is a godsend for nursing mothers! I did a quick search and here is a link to the one we used - at Target. It is a high quality piece, can be converted to a changing table after you're done co-sleeping and then a play pen. It is great for travel too, breaks down like regular playpen. Mine was used by a friend first with her baby, then my 2 boys and it has been passed along and is about to be used by a 5th baby - still in great condition! Just a thought! Here's the link. If for some reason it doesn't work, just search: Arm's Reach co-sleeper. http://www.target.com/Arms-Reach-Mini-Co-Sleeper-Bassinet...

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J.B.

answers from Syracuse on

My little one is 4 months now and she still wakes up every few hours to nurse, I was looking up stuff in this area (breastfeeding and how much they wake at night) the LONGEST she sleeps is 5 hours and that was after I supplement a bottle as her night time feeding after her bath. But I did want to know the easiest way to finally transition her after she consistently sleeps through the night!
My plan was to just use her pack and play and have it next to the bed, she already naps in it and gets grouchy for her naps if shes not in it, that she came up with on her own!

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E.N.

answers from San Diego on

I did the same thing at three months. I was so worried about it, i prayed and prayed about it as i dreaded the day. Prayers were answered! That first night the only one crying was me! I missed her in our bed but she did absolutely fine (: I think you are doing it at the perfect age. Good luck!

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A.T.

answers from Reno on

I would remove one of the sides of the crib, and aling it next to my own bed. May be put some cloth in btw if there is space btw your bed and the crib, but cribs are such that you can adjust to any height, and then you can move the matress of the crib towards your bed. May be you put a couple of pillows around your bed on the floor in case s/he starts rolling but i don't hink that woudl be really a problem if you ar eusing a baby monitorduring naps (where you can hear any sounds that signals awakening). anyways, if you have the crib and your bed next to each other, you can continue to breasfeed without actually removing your baby out of the crib. That may give him a chance to adjust to his new place while becoming not too unfamiliar

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J.M.

answers from Honolulu on

My tip is, don't do it. Sorry, but you will be waking up, getting OUT of bed, and possibly walking down a hall many times a night for A WHILE! I don't know if you are still going to be in the same room, but nature set it up so that we are supposed to be near our babies. If you value your sleep, the closer the better. The problem is, all that wonderful merchandise that they want us to buy tells us otherwise. Let me tell you, the EASIEST nighttime parenting is sleep next to your baby and pop a boob in his mouth when he get's hungry. It's not predictable exactly when (although the books like to tell you otherwise) he'll want to eat, but for at least the first year it's about 1-5 times a night, and it can change night-to-night. Welcome to motherhood :). Just don't fight the system that evolution/God has set up. I recommend a King size bed.

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B.B.

answers from San Diego on

We did it at 4 months with a very smooth transition. I found a sleep positioner to be very helpful to make baby secure in her crib.

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S.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

What worked for us was to start transferring the baby to the crib after he fell asleep. Then, we started getting him to fall asleep there for naptime when we were more patient and alert ourselves. After a few weeks of naptime success, we added the nightime routine. He never had too big of an issue with it. Now that he is 2, he does still get into our bed in the middle of the night at times but we dont' mind.

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I believe that the choice to co-sleep or not is a very personal, family decision and if you're ready to transition, don't let anyone try to tell you what you're doing is wrong. I breastfed my son through his first year and he slept in his crib from day one, so it is possible. It was exhasting at times - I work full time - but since I was able to express enough milk during the day, there came a time when Dad was able to get up with him for at least one feeding in the night, giving him a bottle full of me and giving me a break. I can't stomach the whole CIO deal, so when my son cries, I go to him and if he wants food, I feed him. He was nine-months before he "slept-through" consistently, but I feel he's able to self-soothe now since we established early on that we were there for him. As for how to do it? Establish a night-time routine if you haven't already so the baby knows that bed-time is coming. This can be a bath, book, boob (bottle) or whatever works for you and then try putting him/her down. If he protests, try rocking him to sleep first. Honestly, I didn't even try putting my son down "awake" until he was almost a year old since he would usually fall asleep while nursing. Now (at thirteen months) as soon as the light goes out, he's pointing to the crib (even though I'd rather cuddle for a bit). We also use a night-light and play soft, classical music for background noise. Best of luck and congratulations on your newbie!

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C.J.

answers from Honolulu on

I am doing the same thing, I am getting ready to move to a bigger home so he will be able to sleep on his own bed. Make sure it is comfortable as possible, kind of like your bed, but nothing he can suffocate on.
He is used to a regular mattress so try as much as you can to replicate that. He is also used to sleeping next to a warm body(mommy) now he will have nothing, I would try those cribs that you put right next to yours and it is the same level as yours and you can roll on your side and see in to his bed even touch him without trying to reach into his bed. that way when he wakes up in the night you can roll over and comfort him with out having to get up or/and out of your bed. Really convenient, but be careful because there was one that I bought and a week later they recalled it. So do your research mom. And God bless.

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J.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would read The Family Bed and continue to let your baby sleep with you.We are the only mammals that put their offspring in cages seperate from us.It's so unnatural.Good Luck

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S.V.

answers from San Diego on

The earlier the better. Doctors say by 2-3 months in order to make a smooth transition. I didn't co sleep with my daughter, but she was in a co-sleeper next to me and at 2 months I put her in her crib and she was fine, we were right next door and had a monitor. She did take naps in her crib during the day from birth, so she was familiar with the crib. I also had a tiny love musical mobil and fisher price aqaurium that she loved to look at.

On a second note, I think people should stick to answering your question instead of trying to tell you that you are basically wrong and not a loving mother for not choosing to co-sleep, which by the way can be dangerous for obvious reasons. I have a tremendous bond with my daughter and I did not co sleep. I do not talk down to people who do it, it just wasn't the right choice for me. Same with breastfeeding, it's a personal choice, sometimes medical, and what ever you do is your decision.

You are not a bad or cold Mom for choosing not to co-sleep

Good Luck

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D.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

C.,

I transitioned my baby girl to her crib the MOMENT she turned 3 months. She turned 3 months on 11/30/07 and 12/1/07, she was in her crib! She did GREAT!! Although my daughter slept through the night at 8 weeks. She was swaddled still and yet slept perfectly great in her own crib. She slept longer and better and of course there were some nights where I had to get up and walk over, but as one of the ladies here who posted said, she has gained a lot of confidence and independance after the fact. She plays well, does not have separation anxiety and is a very happy child. She is now 14 months and has always slept at 7:30 and sleeps soundly without a peep until 7am. Make sure you put your baby down early and have a monitor on hand. I have both a camera monitor that we use while we're awake and a sound monitor that we use near our bed. Don't run in there if you hear a peep, your baby may be just shifting around since they are only in REM for 45 minutes at a time. Your baby will most likely fall back asleep. If your baby cries more than just a little bit, then of course go in there and comfort your baby. I never picked up my baby, I just patted her and she would fall back asleep. I personally stopped feeding at nights pretty early because my doctor told me that it was not necessary if your baby sleeps through so don't feel compelled to just feed your baby. I don't have anything against co-sleeping and I did it for 3 months and of course it is easier as many people stated, but I do believe that in the long run, I made the right choice to move her to her crib and she is doing great! Good luck!

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