Okay, so I have a 3 year old who is entirely too friendly with strangers. I don't want to scare my daughter about the dangers of strangers but she will go up to ANYONE and talk to them as if they are long lost friends. What do I do to discourage this behavior? I don't want her to be afraid of the world just more aware of predators.. Thanks.
We watched that DVD from John Walsh/America's Most Wanted called SafeSide I think. It's silly and fun but does give the kids and parents good info.
I had one of those kids! LOL AT three he did not think twice about walking off and visitng. I kept a close eye on him, made the rule that you had to stay by my side, and told him to ask me before talking to a stranger because there are nice strangers and mean strangers. The mean ones don't care who you are they just see you and think you are so cute they want to take you home. They don't care if your mommy would cry and miss you or if you get supper tonight or if you need to go potty. I did not scare him, but it helped to slow him down. LOL
He was still super friendly, but when he went to preschool at age 4 without me, he realized there is a big world out there and mom is kind of like a shelter. ;-) They have to figure these things out for themselves, but your job is to make sure they stay safe in the meantime.
My daughter used to talk to parents at the playground and even used to stick her arm out to parents at playgrounds so that she could lead them around. It was kind of embarrassing! I told her that she was to only talk to kids at the playgrounds...not grownups. I told her she could say "hello" and that was about it. I had to reinforce this everytime we went out and she finally she "got it". I did explain the difference between "strangers" and people we know. Her behavior was not safe for her and one time I even left the park to show her she was not behaving correctly...even if it were overly friendly. This worked for me, but it took a lot of reinforcing "the way to behave in public".
I have not been through this myself, but if it were my daughter, I think I would tell her what's ok and what's not ok. It's ok to talk to people, but for example, if someone asks her to come with them somewhere or to their car, or tries to take her hand, that's not ok. Maybe teach her to be cautious of her personal space and also how to react if someone does something inappropriate, like yell. I'm sure there are books about talking to little kids about safety. Good luck!
I have a granddaughter that is 3 also and she is way to friendly also. I am going to keep an eye on everyone who responds to your question!
I would try role playing with dolls or stuffed animals what you want her response to strangers to be.
In the same way it is okay to tell a child they can't run into the stree because the might get hurt by a car, I feel it would be okay to tell her that some strangers are nice and some are not.
You have got to get the "Safe Side Super Chick" video. It was done by the maker of Baby Einstein, Julie Clark and John Walsh. I got it for my son and we watch it often. It gets the message across without being scary. I have shown it to my friends who have gotten their own dvd and is sharing it with others. http://www.thesafeside.com/ The organization just teamed up with Texas schools and will now be utilizing this video in the school system. It's awesome!
The website is http://www.thesafeside.com/
I tell my 4 year old that I want him to stay by me because he's too cute - I don't want another mommy or daddy to think he should be their little boy. He doesn't want a new mommy (or daddy), right? So he needs to stay by his mommy / daddy - especially when talking to new people.. but really, all the time.
We also talk about the fact that - IF another mommy or daddy (or anyone else) wants you to go with them, you need to yell - YOU'RE NOT MY ______________. POLICE!
I figure that's enough to make him cautions and keep him safer - without talking about the graphic parts of stranger danger that sometimes keep me up at night.
