Toddlers & Tiaras

I think they might be setting their daughter up for a life where they finance a psychiatrists' newest set of golf clubs and a membership in a very exclusive country club.
The moms on that show so often seem to have this weird blank doll-stare that creeps me out.
And what really makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up is knowing that pedophiles all over the world are recording the whole thing.
Yuck.

Well, I don't want to give my age away, but when I was a young girl, my best friend was a major pageant winner. Little Miss California among others. Her little sister was in pageants too. I used to go to all of them to cheer the girls on.
Back in those days, there was no such thing as make-up, fake teeth, fake hair, fake tans. The talent was a group of girls who had learned a routine in dance class and performed together. There were no swim suits or provocative clothing.
My friend was very sweet and down to earth and she NEVER would have been a diva. We didn't even know what diva meant.
These days, it seems to me that this is something the parents are pushing.
The money they spend on pageants could feed a thousand people in a third world country or right here in America where many people struggle. To me, that would be teaching a child about beauty.

Just my opinion and no offense to anyone.

Im shocked at how the parents treat these kids. Waxing their eyebrows at 7 yrs old and telling them to not cry cause "it doesnt really hurt". Right,,, it doesnt hurt the M. does it? What I have noticed is that so many of the moms are over weight, and not that good looking. Not well put together in their clothing either. Im no fashion star but I know scraggly hair and yellow teeth and belly rolls when I see them. They are trying to relive their childhood thru their girls and dont care who it hurts or what negative effects it has on the kids.

I have watched the show you are talking about, and while I certainly don't think it is setting them up for pole dancing, I DO think it's so sad! Why? Well, these poor girls are being taught that they need to be FAKE beautiful. I mean, what girl at 7 years old needs to have flappers (those stupid fake teeth), tans, makeup, HUGE hair/colored hair, high heels, dancing, and $500-$1,000 dresses!!?? They can't just be beautiful little girls...au natural? I hate those pageants. And the people that say that it teaches them poise and confidence are delusional. Unless it's a pageant where they can just wear normal clothes with their hair in pigtails and somersault their way across the stage then that is NOT what they are learning. They are being judged on what they look like. I hope my duaghter is NEVER judged that way. And while I am not naive enough to believe it's never going to happen...I certainly hope it doesn't happen when they are 7.
L.

I can't even watch the commercials. Those moms should be arrested for child corruption or child endangerment. No healthy person who wants kids to be kids would sponsor that sh*t. I've seen the pre-madonna type girls on there (poor things never stood a chance with their moronic mothers). I don't think a pole necessarily because I think the moms teach them they are better than everyone basically, but maybe a homeless shelter because they may not learn to work with skills besides looks. Or they are going to learn that "paying their dues" to the boss is the only way to keep a job. So sad what these little girls are learning. Hopefully most of them will snap out of it and tell their moms to shove it.

@bug, I agree with the psychologist too. It is and it's sick these parents still do it. It's everywhere though, I've seen 6 yr olds at basketball games shaking their butts in skanky outfits (I'm not overly modest so yea these were not age appropriate), ghetto booty dancing b/c the teachers and parents think it's cute. It's like, um you know some weirdo is probably filming this or getting off. Sick it is just brushed off.

I don't think that it is setting them up for pole dancin, but I do think it sets them up for failure---consistent, failure and rejection! These poor little girls are being told that they look beautiful only when they have hair extensions, flippers(false teeth) tons of makeup, tanning, body enhancements etc. It is no wonder that our girls today are so messed up and their body image sucks! I think these girls have WAY too much pressure on them to succeed and the fact that they do it by their looks, is just horrible! I hope that some of the parents reconsider some of the ways that they pushing their children--it is harmful in alot of ways.

M

While we are discussing TLC shows I am disgusted by what I have seen of T and T on "The Soup" and would agree that the moms on T and T seem to be trying to recapture their lost childhood in their kids. I have a friend who calls such shows "prostitots". My daughter is a bright independent girl of 4 years of age and her personality shines through to everyone without dyeing her hair, wearing craploads of make up and dresses that cost more than my wedding dress. Another show on TLC that burns my a** is I didn't know I was pregnant. Again judging from what I see on "The Soup" the producers of the show always show the happy endings for the babies and seem to gloss over the fact that a total lack of prenatal care and drinking and smoking while pregnant does not always turn out okay. I find it hard to believe there are enough women out there who do not know they are pregnant to make a whole series out of it but... Maybe instead of calling it "I didn't know I was pregnant" they could make a show like "Wow, there really are consequences to living the life of a non-pregnant woman while pregnant" Both of these shows seem to be full of horrible messages

i can't stand those shows. what message is it sending to little girls about what makes them important, what their place is in the world? if not "life on the pole," then life with eating disorders, life with loser boyfriends, life basing their value on their hair and makeup, life after teen pregnancy, life in therapy. i'm sure you'll get some responses about how it's "no big deal," or how "some moms know how to do it without damaging their daughters," but these would be the exceptions. so often it is a selfishn move on mom's part to live vicariously through daughter. gross.

I find it sad and disgusting that moms would do that to their daughtrers.

How sad that they are teaching their daughters that beautiful is the most important thing in their lives.

Girls that develop only their beautiful side are in for much disappointment later in their lives. I dated a couple of beautiful girls that had nothing else to offer, no accomplishments, no appreciable intelligence or skills. They were like a hollywood set. All show and no substance.

I'm glad I held out for brains and beauty followed.

Good luck to you and yours.

I think tolerance is the word I would have to use to sum up my perception. I personally don't get the whole pageant thing.....but it obviously works for those mothers. I think their intention is to do the best for their child. So who are we to compare each other and judge what's right or wrong? If I were to see the positive in all this...I would have to say it teaches discipline, confidence, and self-worth. Everything we want our children to develop. How we all get there with our children is different with each family. To project such a negative image as a pole dancer, is not really fair to a mother who is doing the best she can with what she knows and what her values are. I can guarantee you that raising a girl to be a pole dancer is not their intention. More tolerance is what we need, more acceptance is what we need.

S.

That's one of those shows that makes my skin itch.

I can't even watch the T & T commercials or clips on "The Soup."

That show makes me want to hurl.

I hate that show. Like you.. I think the moms are setting them up for some major disfunction later in life. It is sick that these moms who are usually not attractive are pimping their daughter's out like this to get attention they want.

As for cheerleaders... my daughter is a cheerleader and has been for 3 yrs. She is headed into Sr high school (11th) grade and they are not looked down on at all here. It is a priviledge to be a cheerleader... they all have great tumbling skills and do a great job with routines but moreso, they are all heavily involved in the community and looked up to vs looked down on.

Granted... some schools have a few cheerleaders who make the whole organization look bad.

I think it is awful. I am all for dancing and performing but to be giving your 3 year old a spray tan is gnarly. I think a lot of the moms on that show also do this for themselves rather than for their children.

I think that it is interesting that most of the Moms are overweight and not very attractive. I think they are living through their children and basing their worth on their child's success in beauty pageants. I don't necessarily think they are setting them up to be pole dancers, but they are setting them up for arrogancy now and low self esteem when their cuteness wears off. It's not even based on skill! At least a dancer, gymnast, and cheerleader have to have some sort of athetic ability!

I like to watch those shows. Mostly becasue It shows me how good of a mom I am. Those parents are so overly concerned about their daughters looks and how to "win" that if their kids have a tantrum they seem to do anything to appease them. One mom said she chose spending money on pagents and sometimes the electric bill doesn't get paid so what! LOL! I watch with my daughters and we talk about it.
I should add that we knew someone on the show, a mother daughter team- they showed them doing the mother daughter pagent- the daughter was in my daughter's class and the mom worked with me at the Y LOL!