Toddler Night Time Issue

Updated on October 03, 2012
A.S. asks from Orwigsburg, PA
5 answers

my son will be 3 in march and just recently started crying bad at night when i lay him in bed in his room. he will cry until i sit on his rocking chair while he falls asleep (who has time like that at night lol) why i love helping my son get to sleep i want him to fall asleep by himself! last night he layed with me in bed and was out in 5 mins. im giving in cuz i dont want him to cry and get worked up before bed. he will cry and yell mommy sit on my chaiir until i give in. need some tips on helping him fall asleep by himself. this has only started 2 weeks ago. before that he wasnt this bad. hes still in a crib he doesnt ever try to get out of it. do u think its time for a big boy bed? or will that make it worse
thanks moms

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B.G.

answers from Springfield on

Honestly, I would give in. This is just so normal. It is so common for 3 year olds to need to be "parented to sleep." (That's what the Sears doctors call it.)

Right now, he needs to feel safe. Going to sleep at night can be very scarry for a little kid. Their imaginations are working over time. If you are there with him when he falls asleep, he can relax and calm down knowing that Mommy is there, and everything is ok.

I would let this be part of the normal routine for a few days, maybe a week. At that point, sit there for about half the time you usually do. Then get up with an excuse (laundry, dishes, whatever) and a promise to come "right back." Always come back, but gradually increase the time you're gone. After a couple of days, he'll be asleep when you do come back. It won't be that long before you're back to just kissing him goodnight and leaving.

It might take a couple of weeks, but it's totally worth it. Give it a try! He's not playing you, he really does need you right now.

3 moms found this helpful
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D..

answers from Charlotte on

Okay, so he's 2 1/2. He got you to alter from the normal way of going to sleep, he liked it and now he cries for it. Sorry mom, you kind of shot yourself in the foot.

The only way you will get to stop putting him to sleep is to stop.

First of all, DON'T lay him in bed with you. That's WAY going the wrong direction. Instead, sit in the rocking chair, and each night, move the rocking chair farther from the crib. As you move it farther from the crib, turn it toward the door so that you are no longer facing him. Supernanny sits in the floor in the middle of the room, and faces the door. She doesn't speak, she doesn't move. That's what I think you should do. If he cries, ignore him. You are still there and he has to take what he can get.

As you get closer to the door in the chair, he should start dropping off more quickly. Finally, don't sit in the chair. Stand in the hallway. And eventually, standing in the hallway should just last a minute or two.

Try that. It's best to do this NOW than wait to address the problem when he is out of the crib.

Whatever you do, don't bring him into your bed. Then you will be coming on here asking how to get him out of your bed...

Good luck,
Dawn

1 mom found this helpful
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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I have noticed with my grandkids that things they did just fine until age 3, (like spend the night with other family members; leaving their mom or mom leaving them to go somewhere) suddenly causes a problem. I think it's a phase at this age and it will pass.

J.O.

answers from Boise on

I always do it the same way as Gidget. It's a little time consuming in the beginning, but in the end you get a good sleeper.

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L.E.

answers from Provo on

Have you asked him about it? Is there something scary in his room? Is he lonely? Is it too dark? Too quiet? Would it help if he had some music or an audio book to listen to? Is there a shadow he doesn't like? Does he need more story/cuddle time with you before bed? There are a lot of options and you can get him involved in the problem solving. Good luck!

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