Toddler Needs Constant Attention.

First of all, yes this is a typical phase. That being said, something may be typical but also not be acceptable behavior. While you want to respect his need for attention he, in turn, needs to respect your need for space or time. When he starts with too many "mommy look at me" statements, calmly and firmly say to him that you love to watch, play with, be with, listen to, him but you need some time right now to clean, read, feed the baby, work.... but you will let him know when you are ready to give him your full attention. Give him options that are not you. "Would you like to play with blocks or color while you wait for mommy?" Or if you are ok with it, ask if he wants to help you. If you are cleaning he can dust or sweep, if you are cooking he can mix, if you are feeding the baby he can help with that. This is a hard phase for parents to wade through. You are truly not alone.

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From my experience it seems normal. My son just turned 4 and my daughter will be 3 in August. Both of them exhbit the behavior you describe and it has been going on for several months. Being that they are close in age, they will play together giving me some time to get work done or put my feet up for a few minutes. Sometimes using a timer has helped. I explain to them that we are going to have some play time then I need some work time. I set the timer for 10-20 minutes of play time and when the timer goes off it is work time. I often use the timer to allot a certain number of minutes for my work time so I remember to switch modes and do some more kid time. I also pull out Playdoh when I need to keep them entertained while I tend to something else. They love Playdoh. If I can I get them involved in what I am doing. For example they love to help me clean - dust, Swiffer mop, Swiffer vacuum. So I have them do that while I do dishes or tidy up. Hope these ideas help.

This is a typical big brother with a little sister phase. It sounds like your daughter is at the age where they really start to move around, develop a personality and command attention that is not as easily interrupted for big brother.

My children are 8 1/2 (girl), 4 (boy), and 11 months later this week (boy). I have to say, I went through a stage like this with my daughter several months after her brother was born and am currently still going through this with my older son. It really seems to hit them the most when the new sibling starts to move around and play with toys. When they start to become a little more independent, the older one takes advantage to try and get a little extra attention as if you had been ignoring them for the past several months.

My best advice is to set aside a little time exclusively for your son. Let him pick an activity for that time. When he really starts wanting to spend time with you during the day, tell him you've set aside this time for him today but right now you have to get this done and give him some choices of activities he can do during the time you are busy. It has really helped with our kids. They just needed that extra validation that we love them and still want to be with them. Sometimes, they just need an extra hug.

Anyhow, I hope this helps. Good luck with your little ones.

Hi K.,
I'm interested in any responses you get because this sounds like my life! My oldest, a girl, is 3 and my son is 9 months. My daughter's favorite 2 phrases are "Play with me!" and "Why aren't you talking to me?" (the last one comes out through gritted teeth in a very annoyed-sounding little voice).
I hope you're comforted knowing that you're not alone!

Your son is the oldest and hes at that age where he is able to enjoy better intereation with you becuase of increased vocabulary. I tink to it may be personality as well. My oldest is 8 and sometimes it seems our whole world revolves around him. He is is a very intense high maintance boy but seems to need more reassurance from our interactions with him. For now it helps to bolster his low self esteem. I owuld try nad get a break while you can when your husband comes home. Eitehr you go out somewhere while he takes the kids or have him bath your little boy while you play with your daughter or the other way around so you can have time with your son. I feel for you but time passes so fast, in another 10 years he probably wont want you to see what hes up to!!!

Hi K.,
My son (now 5) is an only child and he still demands a lot of my time and attention! O. thing that works for me is to get him involved in an activity and then leave and get something else done. You know, engage him and then let him take it over on his own for awhile. Then you focus on your daughter for a bit. I think as your daughter gets a older, they will probably spend more time playing together. Good luck to you!

My daughter will also be 3 in September and is the same way. I think it's part of her personality - she likes the company of other people. The "look at me part" if I remember reading in one of my books is normal for this age. They love that recognition especially from Mom and Dad. My little one is also starting the Mommy, Mommmy, Mommy, Mommy thing if I don't respond to her right away. When needed I try to explain to her that sometimes I need to tend to other things and that she will have to find something to play with herself. Maybe we should put the two of them together so we can have some peace. Ha. Good Luck!