Toddler Being Bitten at Daycare

OOOOHHHHHH have I so been there. Both of my children have been bitten repeatedly at daycare. I am told that it is because my children are social and non-aggressive, so they are viewed as good targets by the biters, who rightly assume that my kids generally won't fight back. It is *incredibly* frustrating as a parent and I almost pulled my daughter out of the daycare because I did not feel like they were responding to my needs.

First step is to make sure your daycare/teachers are paying attention. You say you are comfortable with that, so good.

If possible, ask that your child be separated from the biter. If there is another class your child can go to (in the same daycare), that may be worth looking into.

Next step is to teach your child to say, loudly and emphatically, "NO BITE!" You want the teachers to reinforce this as well by telling the biter not to do that, clearly and consistently. Work with the teachers to be sure they are encouraging your child to say "NO BITE!" every time. Eventually the other kids pick up on it too and it becomes a form of peer pressure against the biter.

Those are the condoned methods in a daycare situation. Now I will tell you, with my son we are encouraging him to stand up for himself as well, and if that turns out that the biter gets punched in the nose, well, I'm willing to take that incident report. This is not necessarily the method you should try, I'm just saying that's what we are doing after seeing both of our kids go through this. [However I will note that my son apparently interprets this as PINCH someone in the nose, which is sort of funny. And hey, if it works..... We tried to get my daughter to do it as well but she never took to it. Probably a good thing for the biters.]

You should also know that there are 2 stages where they go through biting. You are probably in the first round. It will ease off and then there will be a resurge of it in about 8 months to a year. Be prepared for that.

I was also afraid that my kids would learn to bite but they never did. It does not seem to work that way; biters seem to be prone to it and non-biters aren't. If they aren't already prone to be a biter, it doesn't seem to trigger it.

Also it does not seem to influence the bitten child to the point of fear, although we do have one boy in my son's daycare class he refers to (because we do) as No-Bite Jace. He still plays with Jace, though.

Hang in there, I know it's tough. It will get better and it will go away.

My kiddo was also the "bitee" and not the "biter" - He learned to say "no bite" and we actually coached him to stay away from the biter. He was never scared to go to daycare, and never learned to bite. I remember how frustrated we as parents were, but unfortunately all you can do is wait for it to pass. It's really common. My son is now 26 months old, and he's not getting bitten any more - even though the biter is still in his room. Good luck!

I am not sure why but both of my kids have been the biters. Let me tell you that as much as you are worry about your child getting bitten, the biters parents are stressing about their child biting. I really think my 14 month old that was biting a lot thinks that he should put all yummy, wonderful things in his month just like food. He has never bitten maliciously. My 2 1/2 year old did bite maliciously twice at school. It was so embarrasing. He is very behind in his speech, so we all think that was his way of telling the kids he did not like what they were doing to him. He's in speech therapy, and he has not bitten since I showed him how it felt. That was my last resort, but it what it took.

I always read responses from the bitee's parents, so I just thought I'd chime in on the horrors of being the biter's parent.

I sincerely hope the parent finds a way to curb the behavior.

My child was bitten in daycare by the same child. This happened every week for three weeks. Only once did the bite really leave a mark. I was understanding the first time. The second time, it appeared as if the daycare management was not concerned because they did not follow the steps they had to remove the "biting" child from the facility after the 2nd time..as was their policy. The teacher in the classroom shared the same frustration that I did. The 3rd time...was my son's last day. No two week notice was given. I found left there, and found another great daycare the same day!!

As a former day care worker & a certified teacher, biting is inexcusable. Yes, it happens, but it should not happen repeatedly. They should put a "tail" on the biter...meaning they should be watching that child like a hawk. I would take your child out if it continues.

So sorry this is happening. Hope it will end extremely soon!