Todder Play

Updated on January 05, 2012
S.M. asks from Columbus, OH
5 answers

My daugther is 15 months. She will play with me periodically, but most of the time I show her something. she does it once. and then is onto something else. I feel guilty not playing with her all the time, but she is constantly switching activities and trying to show her independency. Any suggestions for improvement or is this a normal toddler phase?

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

This is a normal toddler way of interacting with her world. Her brain is very under developed. She doesn't have the ability to focus for any length of time.

When you play with her you're in her world. Follow her lead. I suggest that just sitting on the floor with her interacting however is comfortable for her is playing with her. In your world you spend time on one game. She doesn't. It's normal.

Do not feel guilty for not playing with her. She needs your attention, yes, but she doesn't need you constantly playing with her. And......there are other ways to play. You play with her when you change her diaper and sing a song or hand her toys. You play with her when, as my son in law does, pick her up, give her a hug, nuzzle her neck and then put her down when she starts to squirm. Play does not have to be organized. In fact at this age play is not organized.

Gaining a certain amount of independence is a developmental task at this age. Let her be independent when it's reasonable to do so. Letting her move on to a different activity is one of those times.

9 moms found this helpful
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B..

answers from Dallas on

Actually, I think that shows you are raising a very secure and confident child!! It's a very good thing, when toddlers can enjoy independent play. That means, that the world you created for her includes security, safety, and comfort. If you really want to interact more, it will just take YOU doing what she wants. If she's rolling cars, get on the floor and roll them with her. If she moves on to flipping through a book, go with her and point out things on pages. Move with her, and see her world like she does. All in all, it sounds like you're raising a confident child. That's a great thing!!

2 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Marda P said it perfectly!

1 mom found this helpful
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E.S.

answers from New York on

Totally normal! Follow her lead. I actually like when my 21-month-old changes gears particuarly after reading the same book 10 times! LOL

1 mom found this helpful
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K.N.

answers from Cleveland on

My 13 month old just bailed on me, lol. He's very content (right now) to play alone and just doesn't want me there, that's ok, he'll want me in a few minutes I'm sure and in the meantime I can hop on here. After 4 kids and doing childcare for others I've learned to appreciate the moments when the kids are happy to be by themselves.

The key is to just be available when they do want/need the attention and time, and be willing to sit back when they want to explore without you.

1 mom found this helpful
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