Tips on How to Fall Asleep Quicker?

Updated on February 02, 2013
V.K. asks from Chisago City, MN
11 answers

My hubby is always complaining that I don't come to bed with him. He gets up for work at 5:30 and is in bed by 9:30, Oliver usually wakes me up at around 8:30 (But on Tuesdays and Thursedays I also have to get up at 5:30 for work), and I'm not ready for bed until midnight. Admittedly I am always tired and never feel like I've gotten enough sleep. Oliver is also in bed by 9 or 9:30.

I spend all day with Oliver. I just want some time to myself after he has gone to bed, you know? I usually spend that time writing or reading or watching random YouTube videos, lol. When I do crawl into bed I usually lay awake for at least half an hour just processing the events of the day and thinking before I fall asleep. So when hubby wants me to come to bed at 9:30, and I haven't had my alone time, I know that I'm going to lay in bed awake for way more than half an hour and that doesn't sound appealing to me.

But, he just wants me in bed with him. Not every night, not even one night a week, just some nights he thinks it would be nice. I keep telling him to wait until he knocks me up again because when I was pregnant with Oliver, even with a nap, I was passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow at 9 or 10. I think he's getting impatient (We have been together 4 years. This is nothing new.)

So, any tips?

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So What Happened?

Wild One - Yes, I want my alone time AFTER kiddo/kiddos go to sleep. While they are awake I am perfectly happy to be stretched as thin as thy can manage :)

Featured Answers

N.G.

answers from Dallas on

My husband and I always go to bed at the same time, even if one of us isn't tired. If I'm not tired, I'll just play on my iPhone or read my Kindle while he sleeps, or he'll play on his phone while I sleep. We've done that so long that I couldn't imagine going to bed without him, and I couldn't imagine staying up while he sleeps! There are medications (prescription) that can help you fall asleep faster. My husband took one for a while because he was having the same problem. Could you at least go to bed, and maybe read or play a game to help you get tired?

3 moms found this helpful

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Okay - so you want another child but you want time to yourself? You realize that with two, you will be even more stretched, right?

My husband and I have been married for 16 years this October, it is RARE that we EVER go to bed at the same time. When we go to bed at the same time? It's not for sleep. :)

If you are still processing the events of the day and having trouble falling asleep? You need to start writing in a journal so you can get those thoughts out...maybe even a to-do list for the next day so that you don't toss and turn about what you might have forgotten.

4 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

Celestial Seasonings Sleepytime Tea. It is chamomille and peppermint.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Well not for everyone but I put on a Harry potter CD read by Jim Dale they put me into a coma lol. I have to start at the same place for a week before making it to the next track.

1 mom found this helpful

M.W.

answers from Chicago on

Get the SLEEP products from Bath & Bodyworks. I have the body wash and the lotion. Knocks me out in 15 minutes flat!!!! I try to watch Frasier reruns but never make it past 15 minutes of the show. And if hubby wants more than just you lying there sleeping beside him, then don't apply the lotion until you're done. LOL
PS: I heard someone say they love the SLEEP pillow spray too.

1 mom found this helpful
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D..

answers from Miami on

Here's my tip as an old married lady (LOL!) Compromise. Go to bed with him at least 3 nights a week. I'd make two of them the nights before getting up at 5:30, just to make the transition easier for you.

You know what men do... they say "I'm going to bed", and then they go to bed. That's it! Women say "I'm going to bed" and start organizing this and that for the next day and getting this and that done, and an hour later, they're finally turning out all the lights.

It helps your marriage if you really do get in bed with him at the same time. Probably helps in the "lovin' department" too.

So start getting organized earlier in the day. Use your husband to decompress with, even if he's "let go" and started softly snoring in your ear. Once you start doing it more often, you may find out that you like it.

Smiles!
Dawn

1 mom found this helpful
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B.F.

answers from Dallas on

You kinda sound like the little kid who won't go to bed because he might miss something!
You recharge by alone time. There is little time with little ones to do that. I guess the trick is to carve out that time somewhere else. Is H up for that? I have my doubts!
As far as falling asleep, well I have my big problems with that. I have been doing my prayer journal at night before bed and it does calm me a bit. That and a Benadryl that I take every night! Then I watch a bit of tv in the dark while H falls asleep when his head hits the pillow. I swear he has an off switch! I want to find my off switch, too!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

My hubby and I are the opposite of you guys. I go to bed at 10:00 or 10:30 but he doesn't come to bed until mid-night. It has gotten to be that I really don't like it if he comes to bed at the same time I do, I'm not sure why, it just messes with my routine I guess. When we were younger we worked it out by him "tucking me in". Hubby would come upstairs and cuddle with me for a little bit when I went to bed and then he'd go back downstairs that worked out really well, we just eventually got away from that.

My suggestion for going to sleep quicker is praying. I start with what I'm thankful for and then move on to my "wish" list. I never seem to get to Amen, I always fall asleep first.

M

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

When does Hubby get some alone time with the kids?
Seems to me sometime after he gets home and has a chance to unwind a bit he should be able to play with them for an hour or so so you can take a bath or a walk or do what ever on your own for a little while.
Time with Dad can be great fun and they are his kids too.
Another alternative is getting up before the kids wake up to have a quiet cup of tea or coffee alone.
And - well - sometimes the years when the kids are little are just very difficult to get much or any 'me' time.
Sometimes you just have to hire a sitter and go see a movie on your own or visit the gym or have a lunch out with your girl friends.
It gets a little easier as they get a little older.

1 mom found this helpful

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My husband and I always go to bed at the same time. I'm usually up later than him, I have a hard time turning off my head, he doesn't (I hate that! LOL)

So we go to bed at the same time. Every night we read a couples daily devotional, pray together, chat about the day, make some love...not necessarily all in this order. lol Then he will fall asleep and I will lay there and read, or catch up on facebook or I will get up and watch some tv.

If he's not asking you to go to bed with him every single night, then you should be able to at LEAST 3 times per week. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Sounds like a compromise is in order. A few nights a week go to bed at the same time as your hubby. Take a 1/2 tablet of melatonin (natural sleep aid) just before you climb in and within a 1/2 hour you should be sleeping. Sounds like you need to get more sleep anyway as you stated. Then on the other nights do your normal routine. I can relate to craving that quiet time to myself :)

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