My son is going to be the ring bearer in my cousin's wedding this Saturday. He is 19 months old and is triumphantly making his debut in the "Trying Twos" stage. When my cousin asked me if my son could be in the wedding, I warned her that anything goes at this age and she didn't know what she was getting in to :)
Any advice for getting him down the aisle and keeping the craziness to a minimum? Thanks in advance!
Thanks everyone for your great advice! We tried a little bit of everything, and in the end, it was good, old-fashioned luck that got him sprinting down the aisle (with his chubby cheeks bouncing and his tux jacket hanging half off), turning in the direction of the groomsmen and miraculously heading towards the side door where my niece was waiting for him. My husband waited with him in the back and sent him on his way. Since I was singing in the wedding, I was already strategically placed in the front row for him to see and run to (somewhat). All in all, it worked out great, and I can't wait to see the video! Thanks again!
I think you should ask to sit on an aisle so you can help him if he needs it. It's better than having him melt down, get scared, or otherwise be a 2 year old :) at the wrong moment.
Good luck! I bet he'll be a cutie at the ceremony.
When my stepsons were ringbearers in our wedding, we had the best man hold both rings in his pocket and just had the kids carry pillows down the aisle for all the cute effect and none of the risk of losing wedding rings. You're right that anything goes. Even though my stepsons were older when we got married, 4 and 6, the younger one took off in the opposite direction right he was supposed to go down the aisle and my mother-in-law had to retrieve him. He never did make it down the aisle, but it made for a cute story. Just keep a sense of humor. You'll either get cute pictures of him walking down the aisle or you'll get a cute story that you can laugh about later.
T.
My son was young at my wedding and was the ring bearer. We got two cheap rings and tied them to the ribbons on the pillow so that no matter what he wouldn't drop the real thing or the fake ones. We also had an older flower girl walk beside him and if he needed directing she could grab his hand. Then of course at the wedding he wouldn't carry the pillow. No one even noticed because him and the flower girl were just too cute.
When my nieces and nephews were in weddings at that age, the bride and groom would buy a quiet toy for each child (ring bearer & flower girl), wrap it and put it up on the alter. When it comes time to walk down the aisle, tell them to walk down and get the gifts. He may or may not do it at 19 mths. It also gives them something to do during the ceremony.
As a wedding photographer I can tell you that its best not to expect much from him. I've seen them act out of control atthe rehearsal and then walk down the aisle the next day as if it was the most natural thing in the world, and vice versa. During the ceremony is certainly not the time you want to be battling with your child to coax him down the aisle if he refuses to go. The best thing I can say is to make sure your cousinis aware that her ring beaer may not actually walk down the aisle at her ceremony. Try it, if he's not into it after a few nduges, let it go and move on with the ceremony. That will be best for everyone. Hopefully he will end up sitting nicely for a photo or two later on with the wedding party. YOu may be surprised, but as a mother you well know thatthere is just no telling! :o)
My oldest son was a ring bearer for my sister-in-law when he was about that age, and you're right, anything goes at that age! We put my son in a decorated wagon and had the flower girl pull him to the front. Just give him a small toy to play with and maybe a mess-free snack like Gerber fruit snacks and he's good to go!
Good luck and get lots of pictures!!
L.
Woah.....good luck with this task. I am a wedding photographer so I have seen all kinds of tricks, and the trials. Are you in in the wedding? if not, you stand (squat) up front so he can see you, and have another family member stand in the back with him, one he will stay with easily. Maybe you hold a new toy he will like, like a new truck or something and the person standing with him will tell your son to go up to mommy and get the new toy/truck/whatever. Or have him take something to you if he's good at that sort of thing. The most important thing is not for you to be sending him down the aisle with all the people watching, you should be his saftey net at the end of the aisle. Just remember what will happen will happen. When the little ones in the wedding are that little, I only see about 1/2 that make it down. And that's just the way it goes and it's all cute regardless of what happens. It usually helps if there is also a flower girl who can walk down with him as well if there is one in the party. Also, whoever is waiting with your son may have to get him half way down depending on how long the aisle is just to give him a start down to you. I hope it all works out, good luck!
practice makes perfect here
start with small things like have him walk accross the room without stopping hoding a pillow and a small cheap ring
then gradually do it with futher distances
we did this with a 14 month old a few months ago and it worked out perfect but keep telling him what he is doing it for so he feels that hes doing a good thing
Good Luck
Have the bride or groom bribe him with a bag of candy? In the rehersal, put him at the end of the aisle where he will be beginning and tell him to go to the front of the aisle and if he does it he will get candy or whatever treat he likes best.
Repeat this at the wedding.
If this does not work, you could have the child escorted either by the flower girl (who may be older or possibly more mature) or by an adult.
Good luck!
Hi K.,
My son was in a wedding at that age too. We bribed him! I sat in the front with a small new toy he wanted! It worked! I also made sure he was well rested that day, without much sugar! Good luck!
Hi K.! I don't really have much advice for you except stay where he can see you and you can kind of direct him maybe from your seat. When my stepdaughter got married, her 3 yr old nephew was her ring bearer and in the middle of the ceremony when things got quiet, he went to the center edge of the alter and yelled "Mommy, is it over yet?" lol. It was really cute! Good luck!
B.
Well, there are lots of things you can do! I am a photographer and my husband is a minister so we see this all the time! Give him a piece of candy or a treat before he walks down the aisle and then another one when he gets to the end of the aisle. Also, I usually recommend that they not have to stand at the front with everyone- it's too long for them! What works well typically is to have them walk down the aisle and then go sit on the front row with mom/dad/family/whoever. That way they can go back down the aisle when it's time. Most people won't even realize that they weren't standing up front the whole time! :) I've also seen it where the ring bearer is pulled up the aisle in a cutely decorate wagon- it helps keep them "contained" and is fun for them. You might want to suggest it! :) Anyways- just be creative and if all else fails, mommy or daddy can walk him up the aisle!
my guess is that if you are going to have trouble...it's going to be getting him to walk down the aisle...maybe have his favorite toy/stuffed animal waiting for him at the end of the walk...might be able to entice him down w/ that. We had to do that w/ my nephew...Good luck!!!!
One thing my sister did - she took her son to the store to buy a toy and left it unopened until he walked down the aisle at the wedding. They even had it stationed under the pew at the front of the church so when he started down the aisle, he could see it. As soon as he got to the end, he got to open it.
During rehearsals (they did it multiple times) they had candy stashed up front for each time he walked down correctly. Hope this helps!
