Time Management - Madison,WI

Hi E.,
It's awesome that you are able to be home with your children. :) Try to remember that! There are many women who say they would love to be able to stay home.
I have absolutely no good advice. :) I am in the same boat though, so it is helpful to know that we aren't alone!! I am such a list person, I have a list, and I feel satisfied to cross things off. There are days when nothing gets crossed off, the dishes aren't done, the floor is dirty, the clean clothes are sitting in the laundry basket for the third day in a row. I just run out of time, energy, and just don't care as much after a long day.
I guess I should try to put "spend time with my kids", "love my kids", "teach my kids about life", on my list. I'll have years to do dishes, and not enough time to hug my babies. I know, it's hard to feel like that all the time. Remember though, your kids are not measuring you on how "on top" of things you are. They want you, just like you are. A manicure would sure sweeten the pot though, wouldn't it? There's a hint for a good holiday gift.
good luck, hang in there!

7-8am eat
9-11am play, arts etc.
12-2pm eat
2-5pm nap
I cook dinner during lunch so it's a heat and serve kind of thing.

I don't take "me" time unless I walk to the mailbox. I keep thinking to myself that this is my job and this is what is expected from me. Sometimes slip in a bath after the kids go to bed.

enjoy your time with your kids. I work full time and do not have the option of staying at home. By the time I get home it is 6:00 at night. I have to make dinner for everyone and feed everyone so the kids can get to bed by 7:00 or 7:30 (They get up at 5:30 in the morning to get ready for daycare). After I put the kids to bed I feel sad because I never realy got to spend time with then. Then I spend the rest of the night cleaning up the house and then I go to be and start the day over. I do get ever sat and sun to spend time with the kids and I use it to to the fullest! My mother always tells me to enjoy my kids while I can because all she did was blink and now I've left the nest and have started a nest of my own :) Good luck!

I really hate grocery shopping, so I have started doing my shopping on Cobornsdelivers.com (used to be Simon Delivers). They've got competitive prices now that they were bought out by Coborns and you can do it in your pjs.

anne said it. you are who you are and you are a great mom. congrats on being able to stay home.

i was also blessed to be home when mine were growing. i use to take one day a week and do all the house cleaning- scrubbing laundry etc. yeah- well, that was a big pain.

someone gave me the idea of choosing a day for each big chore. monday- laundry, tues- bathrooms, wed-dusting/vaccuming etc. everything gets done once a week just not necc. all on the same day.

i also to this day -kids are both out of house and husband and i both work full time. make a menu for two week period and shop for everything. you can either decide ahead of time what to make each night or you can just see what sounds good toward dinner time. when you prepare that meal mark it off the list.

i also cheated ALOT! i would wait til almost time for daddy to be home THEN straighten the house. get a laundry basket- start in front room of house. put everything where it belongs in that room- if it goes somewhere else put it in the basket. go room to room doing this. take things out of basket as you get to its room. this saves back and forth and distractions.

got lots of ideas- contact me anytime.

kel :)

E.,
I feel the same way! When I was at home with just one kid, everything was dreamy. Now that I have two (3.5 and 1.5 years) all hell has broken loose! I dream of a boring job in a grey cubicle, listening to muzak.

I am a big list person, someone who likes to get stuff done. I have been trying to let go of it all. Here are some ways that I have tried to deal with our life right now.

I keep reminding myself that it won't be this hard in another year or so.

We eat cereal for dinner sometimes.

I make pizzas on flour tortillas and freeze a whole stack of them. I also freeze pancakes. We eat a lot of smoothies.

Sometimes, on Sunday night, I make a menu for the week and this really helps. But I can't do this every week.

When I have a spare minute, I cut up carrots, broccoli and califlower, so they are ready to throw into boiling water when we need to eat.

I squeeze laundry in during the day, and set the clean, unfolded baskets by my husbands chair. He can fold them at night when he is watching TV.

We grocery shop in small batches (yes, I take the kids and I hate it). My husband will make a bigger run to the grocery store every two weeks on the weekend.

I rarely clean anymore. Just vacuum once every 2 weeks.
If I do need to clean -empty the dishwasher, change sheets, etc, I set up a "game" in the room where I am working for the girls to play. It could just be bringing the dump truck into the bedroom and giving them the socks from my drawer!

I have a poem by Louise Erdrich called "Advice to Myself". the first line is "Leave the dishes". I read it every day, because she talks about letting all that stuff go, and really focusing on the authentic- which is essentially giving your kids the best of you (ok, sometimes an un-showered you!)

Good luck, you are not alone.

Hi E.,

My heart goes out to you and I understand how our goals of staying on top of things and that reality rarely work out.

I thought I might lend a different perspective. I'm a full-time working mom and my husband works about 30 hours a week.

I still do most of the laundry, about 1/2 the cleaning and I cook about 75% of the time. I make all lunches and drive our daughter to pre-school 4 times a week. I also do most of the finances. It may seem that I'm doing more and I probably am, but I will say that my husband is NO slacker - he fixes lots of stuff, does at least half the cleaning, the yard, some of the bills and the dog, he gives our daughter a bath once a week and puts her to bed twice a week. He is the primary caregiver for our daughter one full day and night and one half day. The rest of the week he works 3pm-midnight or later. His work schedule is really wierd so we don't see eachother as much as we'd like, but we both try hard to help eachother get things done and (usually ;) don't get on each other's cases if things don't get done.

I guess what I'm saying is - I work 40 hours a week but I still contribute the majority of cooking and laundry and I do half the cleaning. If you work taking care of kids 40+ hours a week, you shouldn't expect to get ALL the laundry, cleaning and cooking done - it's not possible. But it is possible for a 40 hour week working spouse to do lots of household chores. :)

Does this help? I hope so.

Hi E.,
I can help you schedule your day and interact with other moms feeling the same way. Let me know a good phone number and a good time to reach you.

K. Richter

I only have one child right now but sometime he makes me feel like he is 3 children. He is only 8 months old but he crawls and stands and gets into everything. Now i am not someone that keeps a spotless home and that is fine with me. But i have found that if i work with how my son is as certin time a day i can get things done. my son only takes 2 naps a day at only 30 mins each time. so nearly all my house work is done with him in tow. While i have him trapped in the high chair after lunch i get my kitchen cleaned and dished done. Maybe you can make a certain time of day that busys your children so you can get housework done. time to draw, or look at books, you can even have your 3 year old "help" you give her something easy like giving her a cloth and asking her to wipe down everything. She doesnt need to be doing your work for you just so she is involved. My son goes to bed at 7pm and after that is my time with my husband. We generally do our grocery shopping together on friday or saturday morning. If you need time away or just alone then talk to your spouse. the kids need one on one time with both parents. once in a while you can just sit on the couch and just relax and watch your kids play. There is nothing wrong with a litle dust so if the floor doesnt get swept or a load of laundry doesnt get done because you needed to a minute to yourself or you wanted time with your kids then its no big deal

I think Anne gave great advice in reminding all of us SAHMs that it's not about how clean our homes are, etc. (Although it'd be nice if they are, I completely understand.) You're kids will never remember how clean your house is, but they will remember how you spend time with them. I've given myself permission to have a dirty house. I'm now happy when I get a chance to shower in the morning. :) I also try to have a list of things I'd like to get done, but now consider myself "successful" if I get one top priority thing done.

Hang in there...as your one year old gets older it'll get easier!!