Getting Everything Done

The list will never diminish...the key is to focus on what matter most to you. You need to prioritize those tasks and learn to say "no" where appropriate.

I say do whatever you can from showing up on "Hoarders." Start to worry when the camera crew shows up on your door step.

I always keep this thought in my head "you're NOT getting graded" on this!

There is no getting everything done because by the time you finish your list, the first thing on it needs doing again so it's not really ever 'done' for good.
I came close to having a breakdown trying to get it all done when my son was not quite 2 years old. I had a doctors appointment and my doctor and I were talking. I was tired all the time and not enjoying anything. She said something playfully like "Well it sounds like you need to get more organized!" and I just snapped.
I explained to her what a typical day for me was in 15 min increments from 4am through 10pm and "How the hell could I possibly get MORE organized than I already am?".
6 months on Prozac really helped the hair on the back of my neck stand down.
Decide what the core priorities are on your list, then discard the rest.
There's such a thing as stretching yourself too thin over trying to get too much done.
It's not a contest and there are no trophy s for trying to be Super Mom especially if it begins to affect your health, and then who's going to look after everyone if you land yourself in the hospital?

I don't think you 'sound so petty' at all. You feel the way ALL working moms do. Stretched thin.

You'll need to lower your standards a little about how your house looks. You'll also need to learn to ask for help, maybe from your husband? I know I know, yuck, plus if you ASK him to help, then you will have to learn to let him do it HIS way and be happy with that.

You'll have to learn to improvise, to be flexible, to laugh things off, and understand THEY'RE ALL GONNA BE OK ANYWAY!!

Just ask yourself this, in the end, will you wish you spend more time hangin' with your kid (s) and your husband, or more time at the grocery store, vacuuming, volunteering......?

Most moms are more like you than me (I'm a SAHM with teenagers), you are in EXCELLENT company!

It will level out, you'll all adjust, that's what families do!

Congrats on the new job!

:)

I am a working mom of 2 little boys, and feel completely stretched thin sometimes! The best advice I can give is to enjoy the awake time you've got with your kids. From the time I pick them up at daycare until they go to bed, we are together. If that means they go grocery shopping with me, fine. Or if that means I wait until they go to sleep and do grocery shopping late at night, fine. Like a few others have stated, lower your standards on how perfect and tidy your house needs to be. A little dust isn't the end of the world. And a pile of laundry can wait a few days. Remember that it doesn't all have to get done at once! As for time for yourself, never feel guilty about wanting that too. I have a few nights a month when I go out with friends and have dinner or book club, etc. That's also good for my husband to get his 1-on-1 time with the kids. Best of luck!

I asked a similar question a couple weeks ago. I have the same problem (while I have always been a working mom) and it is hard to make the mental adjustment.

I would say that it is best if you block off one or two nights a week (or weekend) that you will go and do all the errands and laundry and cleaning etc... and whatever doesn't get done, you can do next time. Things aren't going to be as organized and clean as they once were, but it is a different chapter in your life. I am sure that since you are back it work there is a good reason for it, so with that will come obvious changes.

If you don't already- try and keep detailed lists of what needs to be done. That is the one way I feel like we get things done. If my hubby (and depending on the age of your children) can see what all needs to be done, maybe they will help out. It will take a little bit to get adjusted and learn the new system, but it will come with time! !

Good luck!

I'm a SAHM and things don't get done now. sometimes i just don't feel like cleaning the bathrooms on the weekend. or doing the laundry one day. so, i leave it for another day. nobody's coming over, the queen isn't visiting (although she can if she wants), so i just let it lie until i feel like doing it. figure out what is priorities, and do that. all else doesn't matter right now.

Put what needs to be done first and go from there. Dishes and laundry can wait until after your son is in bed. I do all of my grocery shopping on my lunch hours or on Saturday morning about 7 (the store is soo empty then). One load of laundry a night will help take care of dirty clothing. Just keep the rooms picked up throughout the week and leave the dirty cleaning until the weekend or every other weekend. I would put volunteering to a min until you get established in your new job and have some time off coming to you.

It is hard, but it is also managable.

No body gets it all done. That is why God made tomorrow!

You learn to create short cuts w/everything. I went back to school full time (12-18 hrs of classes a semester) when my son was 2. My laundry room became our dressers/closets. We used paper plates and cups when we ate. As for housework, I remember if I didn't have time to clean, I would at least go around the house and start throwing things out. It was a way of decluttering I guess and it made me feel a bit better. As for the deep for the deep cleaning stuff, I would spend one morning on the weekends doing it (one week I'd clean the bathrooms, the next week I'd dust upstairs, the next week I'd dust downstairs, etc). This was also the time I got a vacuum cleaner for upstairs and downstairs, started keeping a bucket of cleaning supplies under each bathroom and started using those Swiffer dusting wands (I was a stickler for using a cloth and Endust up till then).

If we wanted to get together w/friends, we stopped having them over and just met them for dinner. And we ate out ALOT but tried not to spend a fortune (splitting meals, going out to kids eat free nights).

Another bonus is that I am an early bird so I got alot of studying and housework done at least 2 or 3 hrs before my son woke up. That really helped me plan my day/week ahead.

GL and HTH

Well, I went from working @ home 2 days a week to help keep things done to going to the office every day now. You know what? Things just don't all get done. Either I have to miss out on family fun to stay home on weekends, or I just skip the chores to join my family.
For the most part, Sundays are usually clear for us. So, while the kids are relaxing and playing outside, I am catching up on laundry, dusting, etc.
Every night, I try to get a load of clothes done, and that helps a lot.
Now, as far as the relationship, that has suffered greatly lately. But, we are trying to work it out. After a lot of pain and heartache, we are going to date once a week. Even if it is just us and a bottle of wine after the kids are in bed early one night.
The kids, I do all of their after school activities with them so, I spend lots of time with them. My husband does softball with my oldest twice a week also.

It is hard, but I just accepted it cannot all get done with our schedule. So, what does get done just has to be good enough. :)

I work full time during the day and my husband works 4:00pm-3:00am. We literally pass each other on the road Monday-Friday and wave. So, after working all day, I am with the kids all night doing things like homework, baths, making dinners, lunches for the next day AND trying to keep up on the house. No fun that's for sure. We now have soemone that somes in and cleans the whole house once every other week and it is sooooo GREAT. For 30 seconds when I walk in I know the entire place is CLEAN and I didn't do a thing! Sooooo worth the $120 a month if there is any way you can swing it.

I try to grocery shop for non-cold items on my lunch once a week. This reduces time at the grocery store WITH the kids.

I do laundry daily or every other day at the very least. And I fold it while the kids are soaking in the tub.

Once a month or so, I make a large pot of chili and chicken noodle soup and then I freeze it in individual portions. This allows me to grab something fast for dinner or lunch the next day at work without me having to do any "work" to make it happen.

I am still wore out by Thursday, but these little things help. Good Luck!

To start with I don't get it all done - does anyone, really? A HUGE help is my husband and I agreed to having someone come in and clean once a week. I never have done bathrooms (SEVERE gag reflex with cleaning the toilet). So having the heavy duty stuff done helps EXTREME.

Otherwise it is about small bites. Just like eating an elephant - one bite at a time. I run errands on the way home from work maybe one today, another tomorrow etc.. Shop from the internet when needed. I store my dirty dishes in the dishwasher until I run it - so as we go they get thrown in the dishwasher. I throw my laundry into the washer in the morning, transfer it to dryer when I get home, fold after dinner/kitchen clean up. I make sure to layout our clothes at night so morning routine is smooth. Meal planning on some level is critical.

Even if I can't complete a task even if I get 5 minutes done that is hopefully 5 minute less the next time.

I am a working mom too and I know how you feel. I try and do a load of laundry a day, and I do make my 2 oldest do their own laundry, 13 & 16. I have my little ones help me with the dishwasher, everyone is in charge of their own rooms, My fiance helps with laundry and vaccuuming and general pick up and cooks dinner about 1/2 the time. I do groceries on sundays or at lunch, I do erreands at lunch or on the way hime from work. I don't volunteer very much any more at school unless its to go on a field trip- which is a great bonus for special time with your child, its worth the vacation day! I also get up first in my house to give myself time to meditate and work out b4 everyone else gets up- that is my me time and I always feel better if i do it! After the kids are in bed i try NOT to do anymore house work to give me time with my fiance. I also try & make sure we do fun stuff on saturdays with everyone kids etc.. I have changed my expectations on the housework a little since i started working fulltime, I am having the kids step up more and then just letting it be. It will take some time to adjust. But hopefully you will get into the flow. I do feel like if get morning stuff done the night before like packing lunch and setting out clothes that is very helpful and i try to engage the kids help as much as I can on top of their regular chores (walking dog, making bed, keeping room generally clean) .

When I worked full time (or even part time) outside the house - we hired a cleaning company to come in every week to do the cleaning.

I would have my children (at the age of 3) gather their dirty laundry and have them place it in a laundry basket. Either hubby or i would take it to the laundry room. now that they are 8 and 11 - they are responsible for getting their laundry down stairs and separated. Pick a day of the week that it is to be done and do it.

Make a list of all the errands that MUST get done. If you have two cars - have hubby do what he can do and you do the others.

Make one night a week FAMILY NIGHT - no exceptions - no phones, computers, etc. play games or watch a movie - order food in (we order pizza or I make it but I'm not working outside the home anymore).

I ordered my groceries on-line and had them delivered to the house. Made impulse buying a non-issue for me! I had my list, clicked on what I needed - ensured I had my coupons ready - and VIOLA - groceries done.

Volunteering at school? Only you can decide when and how you can do that. If your job is a flexible job - talk with your boss and your teacher and pick a day that you can come in to ready or do whatever the teacher needs.

You can do it. It's a matter of getting BACK into the routine again.

Buy the Mom's Plan-It calendar - it will help you stay focused and keep organized!

Good luck! You can do it!

LOL! I work full time as well, have two kids under the ag of five, am married and do my best to keep a clean/organized household. I still haven't 100% learned how to balance it all but I have a lot of energy and am a bit compulsive. Meaning, after the kids go to bed I do walk around the house for about 20-30 minutes picking up after them, us and making sure the kitchen it cleaned. I just don't like waking up to a mess :) My kids are young and I tried putting myself on a schedule with laundry but it doesn't always work out the way I want it to. I do try and accomplish a little house cleaning each night after the kids go to bed but I also don't spend more than 30 minutes doing it. I need some wind down time too and don't need to exhaust myself any more than I already do. I am also a "freak" in that on Sat. mornings I am up by 7:30am with kids and finish my cleaning. Then we do a big grocery shopping and play the rest of the day. By Sunday I am exhausted again but . . . no one said it would be easy :) YOu just have to find yourself a routine that works for you and around your existing schedule. Know you can't do it all, although we Mom's will try :)

Of course you cannot do everything you used to- yikes you have many hours less- just figure out what is important, and to heck w/ the rest. Really.
best, k

I hired a cleaning company to come once a week. They do the scrubbing. We pick everything up and put it away on Thursday nights, then while we are at work they sweep, mop, vaccume, dust, clean bathrooms. When we come home on Friday evening, its all done. I do a couple loads of Laundry on Thursday nights and a couple more on the weekend to finish it up. We spend the entire weekend together as a family and we get the shopping done as needed.

Whether you are are a working mom or SAHM mom, you can't do it all. I know, I'm full time SAHM and I cannot do it all. I do ONE or two tasks a day. If it's one bathroom (I have two) then that is what will get done today...tomorrow I can do the other bathroom. Basic daily stuff (washing dishes, vacuum, pick up/tidying ) gets done daily and it's important, so very important for EVERYONE in the house to pitch in. If your kiddos and hubby makes messes or could help put things away, then by golly stop doing (if you are doing it for them) for them. My husband is a grown man and fully capable of putting his clean clothes away. I have way too much to do to be doing things for everyone else. We're a family of 5....very soon to be a family of 6. My life is busy, yes, but managable because I am doing what I can daily and not beating myself up for the things I cannot do or was not able to do . Try to utilize the weekends for family time, taking time to do things together as a family. Also, something that might help you as well is if you plan a meal or two that you can prepare ahead and freeze. Like maybe on Saturday and Sunday, make an extra meal (or 2), freeze for the upcoming week. You wouldn't believe how much time you save on days you don't have to cook and you are "free" to do something else.

And yes, your expectations are too high. One or two tasks a day. That's it. You can't clean your house in a day when you have a family....unless you are superwoman.