Throwing Food and Drinks

My daughter, who is 21 months, did this until I took her out of the high chair. I tried the no-no, taking the food away, making her get down and clean it up, everything (except swatting the hand)
Then for X-mas, my mom got her a little toddler table for her to sit at and eat like a big girl, and waaa-laaa, problem solved. It was like a little miracle, overnight the power struggle stopped. Maybe it's because now she can stand up and eat or sit down, or because it's not fun to watch the food/drink fly anymore, or just the change in scenary did it, but that's how that problem got solved at my house.
Good luck!

I really disagree with the moms who wrote that there is nothing wrong with giving him a swat on the hand just because they are too little to reason with. It teaches him that big people don't have to care about little people's feelings. It will definitely get his attention but not in the way you are looking for.

First of all, your son is doing what one of my girlfriend calls "gravity experiments." It is totally age appropriate and very frustrating. He is seeing what happens when he throws things. It is very exciting to him, both to see the crash and to see your reaction.

From what you said, he doesn't do it until he is finished eating. It sounds like it is his way of saying, "Get me out of this chair. I'm bored." To stop this behavior, take him out of the high chair before he starts doing it. Watch him when he stops eating and ask if he is finished. If he doesn't start eating again, take him out of the chair. Once he is out of the chair, praise him very loudly and happily when he hasn't thrown any food (even if it is just that he didn't get the chance).

At this age, he can't understand time outs or other punishments. But he does understand that getting attention from Mommy and Daddy is great, especially when you are happy with him. You just have to avoid the opportunity to misbehave. I think you had the right idea when you didn't show emotion in response to bad behavior.

In other situations, if he is doing something you don't like (drawing on the walls, banging on the furniture with his toy hammer, hitting the dog with a toy....), tell him once not to do it and tell him that if he does it again you are taking it away. When he does it again, take it away immediately and say very seriously, "I'm sorry you're upset, but you aren't allowed to (whatever you told him not to do). You'll have to find something else to do." And go back to whatever you were doing.

Also, as you are finding out, boys and girls are just different. My father told me this recently: I was the oldest and when my dad remarried and got a stepson, all his experience was with girls. He thought his stepson was mentally ill. He would run and jump and destroy things. All I ever did was play with dolls and color. Boys are just different.

Well, here's the deal: It/life is kindof a science experiment for boys. Getting mad won't help. He is at the age when he is realizing his power, that's good/normal.
I would not give him a bowl or cup for awhile, just one piece of food at a time, and hold the cup for him, or just put in one sip. ALSO, just leave it on the floor. He will be hungry and figure out if I dont throw it, I can eat it. See he has made it a game. Stop playing the game.
Wait til he takes and ruins all his toys, this used to astound me, but my husband ezplains they are not rreally destroying them, they are trying to figure out HOW THEY WORK.

It's just what youngest children do, I think. My younger daughter did this. I think she probably didn't eat for about a year, because she'd throw it on the floor, and that would be the end of dinner for her. We would try to act nonchalant about it ("It's too bad Isabelle won't be eating tonight, since she threw her spaghetti on the floor") but that is hard when they do it night after night! The good news is, after a while they are hungry and would rather eat their food than throw it.

As far as going out to dinner, my advice is to get a sitter for your son until he is older and can behave in public. Our younger daughter was an absolute nightmare in public, so we just didn't bring her with us, ever. Once she turned 3 things got better, and now she actually behaves pretty well in restaurants. You just have to accept the fact that for now, he is not going to behave as well as your older child did, and plan accordingly!

How much does he snack between meals? Maybe he's just not hungry enough to see things your way. That being said, yes, it is a developmental phase. Try a backyard game where he can throw non food items of various consistencies.
Boy, I know what you mean about throwing things just right! My son went through that a bit earlier and so every now and then when I am cleaning the kitchen I find a speck of baby food that I missed! LOL!

I stopped using a plate. just put food in smaller quantities directly on my son's tray table. They make sippy cups now that have a no-spill valve. Thay can be thrown NOT THAT I AM CONDONING THE BEHAVIOR !! :)

Dear T.,
No offense to you or any other moms, but at nearly 2 years old, throwing food isn't just a gravity experiment anymore.
Do not just wait it out or you will end up like one of my friends who took her son to kindergarten before she ever even tried taking him out to a restaurant because of his eating behavior.
Children can learn what is acceptable, but you have to be consistant.
And it starts at home.

My youngest did it. It's normal. They are just having fun and seeing cause and effect. Maybe if you have the option of a patio or somewhere you can hose off you should have him eat out there.

As far as dining out goes...well, that's difficult in any case when you have little ones. You may just have to do without for a while.

Thanks for bringing up this question- my 16-month-old daughter does it too. I also really am not sure the "best" way to deal with it! Good luck with your future major-league pitcher!!

Hi T.,
Unpopular mom, here. 21 months is plenty old enough for a good swat when he does that. I don't go much for the "ignore it and it will go away" theory. Sure, maybe he's looking for attention, but at some point he needs to learn what is appropriate and what isn't. There's no reasoning with a 21 month old, but let me tell you from experience, a good swat (not a fake tap on the bottom!) will do wonders. If you do it consistently, every time, and be calm when you do it, not showing anger, he will get the idea very quickly that, although there is some attention involved with that behavior, it's attention he's not going to care for. It's amazing how quickly they catch on when they realize the consequences will be consistent and swift in coming. You're going to hear "oh, but that's negative attention", and "that's teaching them violence", and the list goes on. But if you want a well behaved child who you can take out to a restaurant and not be embarrassed to death over, draw the line and stick with your boundaries. Here's what I would do, personally, and you can take it or leave it. The very first time he throws his food/drink, it gets taken away, he gets taken out of his chair (if he's eating a meal), he gets a swat and the food and drink is gone for now. End of meal, end of drink. He'll be shocked at first, but I guarantee it won't take any time at all before he gets the idea that that isn't going to happen in your house as long as you're the parent! Good luck, God bless, and be strong and consistent.
Do that, and you will raise a child who people love to be around!

I agree with Jennifer H. I guess Im not popular mom either. However, my son did that at 18 months one time. Guess what, HE NEVER DID IT AGAIN. I swat his hands and told him no. We do not throw our food. That is a bad boy! That was the end of that. He was telling other kids at that age when they threw their food off their plate. NO NO that is bad girl/boy. So there you have it. Im not a firm believer in spanking, but hello talking to a 1-2 yr old about reason. Good luck with that. How is that working for you? Its a game to them at this age and they are going to see how far they can take the game with out serious impact on them and their goal is to win.

Good luck.

2 amazing busy little boys. 3yrs old & 8 months.