Throwing Food Overboard

Read Parenting with Love and Logic! It's great and very logical advice. They have a website also, but I don't know the address...should be easy to search. Good Luck!

My son went through this, too. I would just say no first, then grab his hand the 2nd time, & look him in the eye & say no firmly. If it got really bad, then I would pop his hand. Eventually, I would take his food away if it got too bad. Good luck! BTW, my son did grow out of it.

I know it's frustrating, but it's probally just a phase. He is probally enjoying getting a reaction from you, whether it's a positive or negative one. It could be the simple "cause and effect" that he's enjoying. He's probally thinking, "Wow, if I do this, then Mommy does that." I'm not telling you to ignore the behavior, but he will outgrow this. But be forewarned, there's always another "phase" looming ahead!

I think all kids throw food overboard just cause its a game to them. As for the "no", he totally understands! He just wants to see how much he will get away with. My son is 2 and a half yrs and he STILL does it! He even laughs if we spank him! I think you just have to find a disipline that works for you and him. My son is older but we do time out, taking away a toy(if he is misusing it), if its a safety issue he gets one spank with a wooden spoon. We also continue to tell him no and redirect his behavior to the "right choice".

Hi,
My son is 15 months and does the same thing. I figured out that he doesn't like sitting in his high chair anymore. It frustrates him. We bought a small table for kids at Ikea for about $19 and he sits there and eats really well. When he throws food, at least in his case, it's usually a sign that he is finished eating. I know exactly how you feel. It is frustrating to prepare a meal and have the dog eat 90% of it.
You may want to try changing where he eats, as it may be that he just doesn't want to sit there anymore.
Good luck!

Hi, this may be a little late, but just now reading my mamasource. It seems to me that your child is disrespecting you and what you are asking him to do. This is and can be a much serious problem unless a child is taught what he must do at the time he shows this trait. It is a matter of teaching (telling) what you want and carrying through (training) of what you have asked him to do. All children must be taught and trained just like you do with your dogs. I believed you said you had dogs. It is a repetition process but it works. Don't give up heart! Good luck. R. B.

1. I spank - I really think it works.

2. If you don't want to spank, there's something called "natural consequences". It works like this: Only give him 2 green beans (or whatever else he's supposed to be eating) at a time. The first one he throws, you say "NO". The second one he throws, he's done eating. Hunger would be the natural consequence.

That said - realize that he is exploring cause and effect, as well as pushing your boundaries.

S.

Most of the time it is just the thrill of "throwing something" at this age. If you lightly slap his hand (not hard) and tell him "NO" then he will understand the word NO and he will stop throwing his food.

Our daughters did that too....it was a beating! We use to call it "Clearing the table" because for us, the plate would go too! I never thought we'd get plates without that suction on them :) For us, they outgrew it - it took a while b/c it also became part of a tantrum at times....thank goodness our son doesn't do it - he loves food too much ;)

Hi there, I can tell you just from my own kids, (5yrs, 3yrs, and 14 mos.) that you can tell pretty easy between whether he understands "no" or not. But he won't learn that in the high chair. Teach him no while he's exporing the family room. Put a couple things he shouldn't touch on a coffee table or something and practice no. A good stern "no" with no smile from you should work. If he smiles, you say it again. If he reaches for it again, you say no again and move him a couple feet back. Repeat. But don't move the object. Just keep at it. They will get it. Now back to the high chair. I figure if my kids did that, it meant 2 things...not hungry anymore or being stubborn (or I guess playing the game.) You just need to explain in baby terms "who's in charge". I still have to "quiz" my other 2 kids on that one when they argue with an answer I give them. If the baby throws food on the floor, I pick it up once. After that, they don't get anymore and the next choice is either from a jar (so I know they get fed) or out of the chair. In other words if they like what they're throwing on the floor, but prefer the "game" then he's done and you should take him out because he's bored. If they cry when you take them out becuase they're hungry, put him back in with the same thing he was throwing out on the tray but catch it before it goes down. Repeat. If you try this, let me know how it goes. It's worked for my 3, but I'm no pro. :)

Cecilia,
My son went through the same phase. It seems like "NO" was a test for him rather than command until he was three...then he finally got it. I would only give him small amounts of food at a time. Then give him more as he eats it. Also, make sure if you tell him NO on anything to back it up with a consequence (i.e. take his food away for a minute). Good luck!

I asked my ped about this exact same thing. Her recommendation, which worked for us, was to calmly say stop throwing or no and then if he persisted, to put the food in time out. So we'd tell him to stop or food was going in time out and dinner was done. Eventually he got that it wasn't any fun. He wasn't getting the big reaction out of mom and dad (because we would just calmly say no) and the food would go away. We also put our dog in a room since she got so beggy around him during meal times (which I think just egged him on).

At this age, they love to experiment so look at it as a healthy sign of normalcy. :) He's not trying to be bad, he's just discovering his world and having some fun too.

My two year old son has been a thrower. he tends to do it first as an experiment but it also signals now that he has finished with that food. We had to start putting him in the corner for throwing and now it happens only rarely, usually when my back is turned. If he has finished eating now he wabnts me to take the plate away. His twin sister has never been big on throwing her food, and the trip to the corner seems to sort her straight out!

Hi. My daughter, who is now 16 months did the same thing, although my five year old son never did. I think she did it because she was interested in gravity. She would watch as the item would fall. Noodles were her favorite and I think that is because they landed is such interesting and different patterns. She has shown other interests in being artistic, such as 'painting' with her food. I just let it be. She soon learned what she wanted to know and mostly stopped doing it, except when she is bored. If the dogs are eatting it, that may interest your child and also be a reason.

They are old enough to understand no if it is consistant, but just remove him, clean him, and put him in a confined time out away from others for one minute. He will fuss, but he will learn that if he wants to keep eating, he can't do that action. Hand slapping leads to spanking before you know it, and all they get out of that is that mommmy hurt me, which can cause trust issues later, and nightmares. I resorted to spanking with my son, and I regret it. It would have been better to take some parenting classes and get ideas for how to handle him. They will test and retest to see if 'no' still applies. This is part of how they build a sense of security. If you reply consistantly each time it reassures them. I had to earn a masters of education before I had a clue how to be a parent. It is good you are talking to others. I would have been better off doing that more.

You will love this resource:

http://www.michaelolaf.com/JCcontents.html

http://www.michaelolaf.net/1CW312teach.html

http://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=29Qhmp...

Enjoy,

K. :)

Cecilia,
I have a 16 month old son who does the exact same thing. Basically, once he starts feeding the dog and throwing the food down on the floor I know he's done. I have also done the slapping the hand thing and it doesn't faze our son. So, I take the plate away and he is done. It may sound mean but I am not going to have him throwing food all over the place. So far, he doesn't seem to care when we take it away so he must be done. I wish I had some words of wisdom but I don't. Hope it resolves soon for you! Good luck!
M.

I'm in the same boat. My 16 month old does this and has for a while. We tell him no or give him a swat on his hand and he looks right at us and does it again. I don't have the answer but recently read that little ones feel very over whelmed with larger amounts of food and will sometimes make it more managable by getting rid of it. I do think they have fun with the cause and effect as well though. I've tried to give smaller portions (like 2 or 3 green beans and a bite or two of chicken at a time) and then give more when he's done with that. I can't say it's solved the problem. I will probably check into the kid's table as someone else suggested since we were thinking about it for drawing/ coloring anyway. Good luck.

Kids at that age are learnng cause and effect, oh and bondaries. They have so little control in their little lives they feel, that they love this little control they have found. They throw something and we pick it up, its like a learning game. Also he's playing a game with the dogs. If your child is still hungry he's not thinking like that he knows mom and dad will replinish the food. I would start by removing the dogs from the kitchen area. If you child is still throwing food explain no no we don't play with food and if he continues get him out of the chair and tell him we don't throw food so we will eat when you stop throwing the food and try again in a little while. It may take a few times but he'll get the message.

Slapping, possible spanking would be the worst for this behavior. It's like telling them "don't explore, don't be curious, don't learn."
You might look into reading Some Dr. William Sears books.
Kids that age are learning that what goes up must come down. Also, no means very little to them.
Can't you try feeding him one bite at a time so that he gets enough nutrients. Then let him play/learn with his food.

**Yikes: I just looked at some of the harsh discilplinarians on here. Poor kids!!

After a stern "no" you could put him in his crib with no toys, blankets, anything...leave him in there for 2 minutes then try again. This worked for for both my kids, that have totally different personalities.

If he continues to throw food after 2 or 3 times, take the food away. That food can go in the fridge until the next meal...Once he 'knows' that you are the one choosing his food he will accept what you give him more easily.

Hope this helps!
~K.

I don't know that I am very "experienced" since I am a first time mom of a beautiful 24 mo old, but we have already gotten through that phase. I am almost certain he understands what "No" means. They are just learning about cause and effect at that age. My suggestion would be to have a time set aside when he can play with some liquids, and pouring, etc and different foods like different dry cereals and make a mess. And of course have him help clean up. I have found that when I give my daughter a time where it is ok to do the things she is wanting to do, then "No" is acceptable to her when it isn't the appropriate time to play. Another example that has worked, is letting her play in certain cabinets that are safe, and others she is not allowed to open. She is fine with it, because she still gets to play in the cabinets. I also would suggest signing up on line for Huggies website. They send you and email monthly and or weekly about what your child is doing at that exact age. It is a quick and easy read that really has helped me know what to expect or what is "normal" just at the time that I am wondering or needing the advice. And in the mean time, only give him a small amount of food at a time and ask him directly if he is finished if he starts to play. Good luck!
33 year old working mom/wife...married 6 years.

Cecilia
Unfortunatly, it is a growing stage. My recommendation, is only give him one or pieces of food on his tray at a time.
Your on the right path, that when the food goes overboard, it is his way of saying "I'm done". I would then take him out of his chair, and let him go. If he still wants to eat after that, put him back in his chair, and let him eat. Eventually,he will learn, that when he's in the chair, it's time to eat. Throwing it overboard, means he gets no more and out of his chair.

Well, I don't know how "experienced" I am, but my two children did (do - one is 18 months) the same thing! It must be developmental! It's so frustrating! My cousin told me to simply take the food away immediately and offer it back several minutes later. Throwing food = no food. If it continues to happen, no more food until the next meal. Sounds mean, but, you're right, they just kind of smirk if you try anything else. I can't say that this method has been entirely successful either. I'd love to hear what other moms say too. Otherwise, if your dogs aren't inside dogs, buy a stick vac like they have in restaurants so you're not contantly down on your hands and knees picking up food. This too shall pass.

Try feeding him as you also eat your meal. Do not hand him his food to play with. He might think it is to play with.

This is completely normal. I think it is just a part of life kids go through. He is learning that when he drops something it falls to the floor. He does it again and again, because he wants to know if it happens everytime he throws something over. It takes doing things again and again to define his world.

As for the no, a 14 month old has no self control. He is not being malicious or trying to make you mad. He just can't help itself.

With my children, who both did this, we have them help clean up. So, I would put the dogs away, so that he can help clean the floor. Sometimes I would have to guide little hands over to the food, but they caught on pretty quickly and would help. In our house discipline means teaching right behavior not punishing wrong. So we are teaching are children that when they make a mess, they need to help clean it up.

It is a phase that will pass. Eventually he will figure out that the food will drop to the floor everytime he tosses it, then it will get boring.

You've gotten a lot of advice--and I can tell you are doing a great job being a mom since you're bringing this question to us Moms who have either been there, or are still there. I can only tell you what I did, and that it worked for me. I just didn't let my daughter have the plate on her high chair until she was probably 2 1/2 yrs old. I didn't let her play with her food, ever. I fed her the wet stuff with a spoon until she was about 18 mos, then I let her dig in while I held the bowl. Finger foods were given one-at-a-time. It may have been controlling and labor-intensive for me, but she never threw her food or played with it, and never has. She ate with us as family as much as possible. She got a kick out of the dog eating her food if she dropped it accidently, so you have to be careful with that. That's very entertaining for a toddler to watch a dog lap up green beans or Goldfish off the floor!

Cecilia, First of all I applaud you for not wanting to spank his hands & find another solution. I had 4 boys & I don't think it's just a boy problem, but they all did what you are describing. Your son is having a very good time. He feels that he's becoming a little less dependent by feeding himself, he's learning to throw & they love that, and even if you are telling him no, he see's he's making the dog happy by feeding him and also has learned that he has some control over the dog, by keeping him there waiting for what he throws him. If NO is overused then they start blocking out the word NO & act like they have never heard you. I would try & get the dog out of there, while he's eating. He really thinks that no matter what you say, he's doing the dog a favor & the dog is still hungry or the dog wouldn't eat the food & he's found him a brand new game. If he is like most children, he really wants to make Mommy happy and if you picked up the food & threw it away & explained it's his food, it might even make the dog sick that might help. Give him smaller portions & if he throws it on the floor, don't give him more. If he's eaten enough that you know he's not starving and he asks for more, tell him that's all he gets & he doesn't get anymore because he's throwing the food on the floor or sharing with the dog. It shouldn't take very long for him to learn this. You may be actually giving him more than enough to feel him up. So I would go to small portions & if he doesn't throw it on floor or to dog, he gets more or maybe a cookie or snack. Maybe this will help, best of luck, it will pass.
R. M

My kids are now 12 and 14, but we went through the same thing. I also have five "bonus kids" and three of them have blessed us with grandkids. It's SO hard not to laugh because they are in the 'prime time' for frustration right now with grandbabies at 2, 1 yr and 9 months. I just had the throwing food and mimic conversation with one of them a couple weeks ago. Just like throwing a toy (that isn't meant to be thrown) gets the toy taken away, use the same strategy with the food. If at all possible, remove the dogs from the scene. Conquer the no throwing food situation first and then you can move to the don't feed the dog part. Personally, I've had far more success with a calm voice and firm resolve. Yelling at little ones only makes them more resistant to discipline. Very soon your son will enter the mimic stage, but he's already processing the examples he sees. Meal time is quiet, we eat, we don't talk on the phone, get up from the table, we don't feed the dogs from the table, etc. Give him just a couple of pieces at a time and he gets more when he's finished those. It is just too much temptation for a little one when there are 20-30 pieces of food in front of them. This too shall pass and you'll need more energy for the 'battles' to come, but you can start a habit of calm, firm discipline now that will set the tone for later. Best of Luck!

OK, my son is now almost 3 and he definitely went through this phase...I'm happy to say that he doesn't throw food anymore! It was such a regular occurance that my in-laws dubbed him "slinger" and used to say no more "slinging" and "this is a no sling zone". :) I too tried the slapping on the hand--he would pretty much laugh at me when I did that--sooo, we decided one of us would have to just sit with him and pay close attention to what he was doing and try to catch him before he did anything. He did finally out grow it, so hang in there...and thank goodness you do have dogs, it definitely makes the clean up easier!

Girl...I dont really have any advice for you but it is good to hear someone else going through this!
Ally is 20 mths old, and still throws food to the do!
I guess the only way that has semi-helped for us is to put the dog in another room when she is eating. She tends to forget about him when he is not there!

If you find something else...let me know!

Oh the memories......mine are now 14 and 15......yes it is normal as he experiences his world and his effect on it and no, he does not have a clue what 'no' means yet.......I used to spread a plastic sheet under my son ...lol....but, it does help to give them less at a time and you might just put it straight on the chair tray to save the flying saucer.....this will pass, and you really will look back at it with the same smile, or smirk, that I am right now....enjoy as this is a great age as they explore and learn........

Hi Cecilia,

i know exactly what you are talking about! i have a 14 month old son and he does something similar. my husband and i weren't sure how to handle this behavior so we went to babycenter.com to see if the Web site had any advice and sure enough, there were some articles about it. i would highlly recommend you looking up the articles on the site.

apparently, this is a phase that children go through. they are testing there limits. with throwing the food overboard, they are learning how far the food falls as well as how far they can stretch mom and dad. our sone, Ian, will start throwing food sometimes mid-way through a meal. that is an indication to me that he doesn't want to feed himself anymore and i try feeding him myself. if that doesn' work and he is refusing food, then i know he is done eating.

he also throws his sippy cup on the floor a few times. i ignore it at first and then pick it up after a few minutes and put it on his tray. if he does it again, i will pick it up and put it out of his reach.

i hope that the articles help you. we took the information that we read and tailored it to Ian. Hope this helps!

Sincerely,
L. D.

He is just testing his limits- my daughter does not throw food but she bangs her cup on the table and I know that smirk well. That smirk says I know you just said NO but I'm going to test my limits with you. It is hard because everything is SO cute at this age (even the smirk) but you can't let him think this is some fun game or it will go on. We take her cup away and she doesn't get it back until after dinner. I would say you'll have to be tough. Missing a meal or two wont' starve him. When he throws something ask him if he is done and then give him one warning that you'll take his food away- even if he doesn't understand. Then the next time he throws something just take his tray away ,unbuckle him and tell him "we don't throw food" or "you must be done" and take him away from the table. He'll be MAD but mainly because his feelings are hurt not because he's starving. Wait an hour or so and try again.

Good luck- it sounds like your little man is testing limits early :) Stand your ground now or he will walk all over you.

Sorry, but I have to laugh. My son is the same way. Actually, he is now 20 months, and he has gotten MUCH better. We couldn't go out to eat from when he was about 13-17 months, because it was a total nightmare. He would do the same thing when we told him no, he would smile a do it again. I think that they just really like getting attention. I noticed that my son did it more when he was ignored for a while. We started to praise him when he would eat well and not throw the food, and I'm not sure if that was what helped, or it was just that he grew out of it. Also, when he starts throwing food everywhere, we figure its because he's not hungry anymore and take away his plate.

I feel for you. All my three boys threw food overboard. It eventually stopped. Children this young may not understand the word "NO", but they understand that they are getting your attention. And he seems to like it. Continue to let him know what is appropriate for he is learning, and try different things you will eventually learn what works and what does not. This is some of the many things we tried. Mainly, we no longer allow the dogs around the table while we eat. We fed the youngest before everyone else. He still sat with us at the table, but the mess was minimal. Also remember that Toddlers are little Scientists. They are courious about the world and how it works!

He may be starting to testing his boundaries which is totally normal for that age. Or he may just like to watch the food drop to the floor. What I did was just give them a little bit at a time (food) and eventually they will grow out of it. Its not worth getting upset over because there is no reasoning with a 14 month old. At that age they are not thinking as in depth to things as we are. Good Luck!

This is what we did. Kind of a 3 strikes your out.
1. Say no. Make sure they look you in the eye.
2. Say no - when you throw food mommy will take it away
3. Say no - you threw the food again. So mommy has to take it away. All of it. Not just the green beans b/c then they think throwing a food they don't want is good communication.

At 14mo they can basically get it. Save the food b/c they will probably decide they are hungry again. It usually works best to teach this with a snack that they really love. That way they care if you take it away.

I'm with you --- throwing the food isn't the big deal. It is the defiance. This can become quite a battleground for a while --- so unless you want to deal with it at dinner, you might want to ignore it for a couple of months. They do seem to grow out of the phase. But then I think you have to really ignore it and not tell him no.

Ah... just the first of many battles of the will :)

Hi Cecilia -

I have 17 month old boy/girl twins and for some reason only my son tosses his food. He's been doing it for about a month. I quit making a big deal about it about a week ago and now he's not doing it as much. Now whenever he happens to toss a meal I try to remember to ask him (very clearly) "are you done?" and the funny thing is he'll nod his head YES. So now I guess I should start heading him off with the question early into the meal...

I have to agree with the poster below me. He is trying to see what happens.

Understanding no. Well does anything happen when you tell him 'no'? Anything that he does not like?

I personally would slap my child's hand a little and say we don't throw food down. I also did not allow them to play with the food. Once they started that, they were done eating.

But I also want to say ...remember this later.
When he is stomping his foot as a two year old, slamming a door as a 3 year old, or demanding to wear no jacket in the snow as a 4 year old.
It may seem cute, but you are setting patterns now. Get a good start and say while this is cute, it is not something we need to learn to do or encourage. ;-)

Good luck.

I would go ahead and disrupt his meal to have him clean up each piece. Delay the yummy part of the meal (fruit or dessert) until all is cleaned up. In a cheerful, sing-songy voice, you can say "In our house, only people who have cleaned up their spots get their desserts." I would remove the child from the high chair, move a trash can or small container (that you can rinse out later) for the child to pick up the food and discard in. Don't feed the child extra snacks when he/she is hungry. Just say "Oh, that's too bad that you threw your food off your highchair. I bet your tummy wishes you didn't do that!" Then hug your child, b/c you're not trying to exert your authority... you're using cause and effect... you're still on their side and you don't want the child to become angry with you and focus the lesson on what a meanie you are. 18 months old isn't too early to learn this stuff. Between my daughter and the stepson I've co-parented since he was 13 months old, I had this ready for my son when he was born. It will be a total pain the first couple of days you do this, and you'll feel mean b/c you'll have to be consistent with your child. But it will be worth it in the end. One or two days with a hungry tummy between breakfast and lunch or between dinner and breakfast won't kill the child.. it'll just remind them that they WANT that food on their plate. Another good thing to say when your child expresses that they want a snack... like after dinner... "Oh, I'm so sorry that you didn't eat enough food before you threw it away... I am going to make you a BIG breakfast in the morning, sweetie."
A friend of mine has a son who did the same thing, also. She took the food off the high chair the minute he began throwing it, and he was just finished with dinner. I think she may have even set a timer for how long he should have sat in the highchair for dinner (8 min. or so) and he would sit there with no food, no activities, and just watch his folks eat. After a few tantrums they endured while finishing dinner, he seemed to straighten up.. he's one of the only kids I know that eats salad... Whether it has any connection, I don't know. Good luck.

I am 61. Do not gently slap cuz soon it will be hitting. Give him one bite on the high chair at a time in a room where there are no dogs. You can put a shower curtain under the chair. Do not look at him and therefore he will not be able to be pleased that he has your attention. If he throws it all on the floor, do not give him more. Let him go play. He will get hungry later and you can put him in the chair with a little food. He is also learning cause and effect by throwing the food. Let him practice that skill from the sofa with toys. He will do it over and over again and you can read a book as you place the objects back up onto the sofa. As long as he is getting a reaction out of you by throwing it from the high chair he will continue that behavior.

Are the dogs in the kitchen while you all eat? Not a good idea if so, your little one may be thinking their "cute". Is he on a schedule or snacking a lot? He may not be hungry. I've noticed anytime I go in a house where the dogs are loose while eating it creates a playful atmosphere and who cares about eating I even want to feed the dogs. Let's all throw the food...

All the advice that you've gotten so far is really good. I've got four kiddos and they all went through this too. It's normal. One thought I want to add is if the dogs are loose while he's eating, he may be additionally intrigued at the cause and effect that plays out when he tosses some food to the dogs. He may enjoy seeing them run to eat the food.

If that's the case, in addition to the steps you take to teach your son not to throw his food, I would encourage you to put the dogs in another room at meal time so they don't work against you. Good luck!

Try giving him one piece at a time instead of a plate full or bowl full.
You could also try ignoring him and letting him do without for a moment or two. If you jump when he throws, it could be part of a game to him.
Children are fun!
Hugs,
E.

My suggestion is to think about how firm you're being. Maybe your stern voice isn't that stern. I realized that was my problem too. I thought I was being firm and realized along the way that I was far too calm and gentle sounding to get my son's attention and really make him feel like he'd crossed the line. It sounds a little like you're being too tolerant of this behavior even though you don't mean to be.

Try to sound like you've REALLY lost it even when you haven't. Think about how much harsher your voice sounds when you're really angry and try to put that into your voice when you scold him. Also, try reinforcing that not only with the spank on the hand (a little sting won't hurt him, and can get his attention fast) and then taking the food away. Tell him that if he is hungry, he can eat, but if he's going to throw his food he can't have it. You take it away and go about your business for a few minutes then offer it back to him and tell him that if he throws it, he can't have it. Give him three chances and then he's done. Reduce those with later meals, and he'll learn pretty quick that this behavior isn't being tolerated anymore.

I know how hard it can be when they are cute and they KNOW it and try to charm their way out of trouble. Mine is ADORABLE and he does that all the time still. I've had to really clamp down on myself not to let him charm me because it is a safety issue now. He will run off toward the street or parking lot when we are out, giggling all the way because he thinks its funny, while I'm screaming at him to stop and he ignores me. This actually triggered an episode with my heart condition and caused me to faint! So I've had to learn the hard way that you have to be firm and discipline them out of love for them and their safety and for your own sanity and safety as well.

Good luck!

Hey, not that I'm experienced, my only son is 12 months old and he does the same thing. maybe not to the extend yours does but as soon as he has enough he starts feeding the dogs and loves it. I do have to say I read everywhere that throwing anything is a way for them to experience physical laws of things, like how they fall due to gravity, what sound they make when they land and what happens next, like if you pick it up or not. I think if he's hungry he will eat and if not he will throw. That's what my boy does. My son also sometimes just needs more time and breaks between spoonfulls. It sometimes takes 5 minutes of playing and then all over sudden he opens his mouth wide again to be fed. I just hang in there, eat myself in the meantime (we always eat together at the table, no snacks only for baby in between except of nursing) and enjoy the dogs cleaning up.

I concur with Laura's comment: **Yikes: I just looked at some of the harsh discilplinarians on here. Poor kids!!

Many if not most of us in this troubled society need to re-parent ourselves to some degree before we can truly parent another being. Merely producing offspring does give a person parenting skills!!! A mother who can respond to her child's emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual needs is BORN, through continual personal transformation (a rich inner life) and a deep self-respect which gives her abundant respect for the new souls who have come in the form of her children.

A very BASIC understanding of human child development sorts alot of this out! Children are naturally and innocently egocentric as they voraciously experiement and explore life in the earliest years. We are here to facilitate that exploration with wisdom, safety, and effective and age-appropriate communication.

If a mother or any caregiver feels like slapping/smacking or dramatically shaming a child, that feeling is about their own stress level, isolation, immaturity, and/or denial of the need for skills education and support.

There's alot of good science out there in 2008 to make it abundantly clear that physical punishment, in any form, serves an immature adult agenda and actually promotes lots of mixed messages about love, limits, and the sanctity of the body.

Dr. Phil's book "Family First" has a great section on this. Brilliant psychiatrist Alice Miller, now in her very lucid 80s, has written several scholarly books on the the influence of childhood and physical punishment communications on the adult's life, and on society as a whole, which are studied in leading-edge Child/Human Development college programs.

Also, the organization "Parents & Teachers against Violence" has an extensive website with resources and science about how smacking, slapping, and hitting children creates vicious cycles with serious political & social consequences...

Think about it: smacking and slapping teaches that physical force and domination is a way to resolve things. And our children repeat the early childhood development stages of ages birth-4 on a psychological level from 12-16!!!

The consequences of slaps and smacks and shamings of our babies/young children come back to mothers big time when adolescence arrives and that child pays you back through hiding their true self, rebelling against everything under the sun, or simply being full of negative emotions when it comes to YOU.

A refreshing book that transcends the divide between east-west parenting philosophies is Arun Gandhi's (grandson of Mahatma Gandhi) book "Legacy of Love" wherein he conveys the traditional spiritual parenting technique of the adult going into a state of deep self-questioning and self-attunement to their emotional reactions when their child acts out negatively or is just pressing the boundaries of patience.

Also "Parent Effectiveness Training" by Thomas Gordon (a very cool guy and famouos book, recommended by parent educators the world over) takes age-appropriateness and teaches parents how to CREATE harmonious, effective relating. It can transform one's parenting patterns, and prevent an adolescent revival of the intense power struggle strife.

It's not about acting out upon the child, but going within and searching for our own wisest and most-connected presence, cultivating our best self, the one that can teach alot silently, through example.

Children your son's age have no impulse control, and no real sense of what the word "NO" means...he sees this as a game, and he likes the attention you give him when he throws his food on the floor. What you can do is to keep his food dishes and utensils out of his reach as you feed him. He's still a little young, so I would not expect him to be feeding himself entirely just yet. You might also try to put a few finger foods (cheerios or such) on his high chair tray for him to "play" with. This may keep him from throwing his "real" food on the floor. I did not expect my children (and now my grandchildren) to feed themselves without tossing food around until they were well past two years old.

My daughter didn't really have this problem but maybe a couple of times. I've always used a stern voice with her so she knows when she's done something wrong and she usually quits. But I will say I look at it like breastfeeding a baby with teeth, when they bite you take the food source away temporarily, give the food source back and try again until they understand that the behavior isn't acceptable. Good luck to you!

All kids this age throw food down. The easiest way to stop the behavior is to ONLY allow your son to eat when he's in the high chair and as soon as he throws food on the floor tell him NO, DON'T THROW YOUR FOOD ON THE FLOOR and immediately take him out of the high chair and on to another activity. You can offer the food to him again in 30 min or an hour. He won't starve and will get the hint after the first few times.

I would suspect that he is doing it for two reasons. He is enjoying watching the dogs come by and eat it. He is at that cause and effect stage. The other is he just like the attention it gets him. Even negative attention. I would ignore it and just play it up by everytime he does eat it make a huge deal. "Oh look at all the food you are putting in your mouth."

Don't worry this too will pass and something new will come along. Like highchair jumping!

Mom of two- 7 and 15

I don't think all kids throw food on the floor. Mine don't but I have seen my brother-in-law's kids doing it and they also have a dog in their house. I don't know how to explain it to you. My kids just don't threw food to the floor when they were like your kid's age. I guess I am just lucky. When they were younger, I tried to assist them to eat. Sometimes my kids got fuzzy about certain kind of food but they most of the time ended up finishing it. I think mostly because I helped them out to eat and sometimes I diverted their attention. I sang and I talked to them when I shoved food in their mouth. I tried not to use the word, "NO" to them too often when they were little because kids sometimes get used to the "no" word, it will not mean anything to them. I think you can try to explain to your kid that throwing food on the floor is unacceptable (I know it sounds ridiculous since your little one is so young but believe it or not, the little ones do understand). I don't spank my kids but I do slap them on their hands. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But be patient , things will get better when your son gets a little older. As long as your son knows you love him, a little bit of slapping and "firm voice" is okay.

GOD he eats! 5 greenbeans! You are so lucky.
They all throw, but mine don't even eat, we wonder how they survive.

This is perfectly normal for his age! He is discovering cause/effect and that things are not gone just because he can't see them. It really has nothing to do with him not wanting the food. At this age just try not to laugh or smile at the cuteness of it- because then he will think it is a game and do it more! Just firmly say "No (name), we do not throw food!" Other than that, try not to give him too much attention for that behavior.

Now, here comes my motherhood mantra, "This too shall pass!"

P.

Both my boys did that when they were that age. My youngest did it often and for longer period time than did my oldest. I think the issue just resolved itself over time. Just keep telling him no and sooner or later he'll grow out of it.

Hi Cecilia,

Maybe your son like to watch the dogs clean up his mess! I would try putting the dog outside and then putting your son in his highchai to eat.Make sure your son sees the dog go out though.

If that doesn't work I would say "No" one time..and then if he does it anyway, then take him out of his highchair and take the food away. Once he gets hungry enough and understand who the boss is...he should come around and start eating instead of trowing.

I hope this works! Keep in mind to...this is of course a phase! Eventually he won't be so entertained with it!

yes most kids throw food. i hope your dining table is not on the carpet. (if so buy a cheep rug or plastic thingy to go underneath). try to give him TINY amounts to help regulate his behavior. self-feeding is important and will pay off soon when he figures out how to be a responsible appropriate eater that you enjoy being at the table with (okay, it might take a year or more for that lofty goal!)

but the best thing to do is say that throwing food means "all done." You say firmly, "if you throw food you are all done". we had a major food thrower until we started that. voila. hope it helps.

Take him out of his high chair as soon as he throws food. Tell him food is for eating, not throwing. Then do something else for a while until he wants to eat or you think it's been long enough to try again. He'll figure out soon enough that he won't get to eat if he throws his food. Good luck!

Yes this is normal its fun its become a game. If you don't like it them ignore the behavior if he doesnt get attention by doing it then hell stop, any attention is good attention. He eat if hes hungry, other than that pay it no attention, you can use redirection too getting him interested in something else or when you do see him eat his food give him praise for that. But, if he throws his food pay no attention say nothing.I am against slapping on the hand it just teaches them that if they don't like what someone is doing then you hit them.

You have gotten a lot of great advice--I just want to also say that yes--they are little scientists at this age and for a while and love to throw things because the notice that they can actually "make" something happen. If you do react more to it than they will do it more. Sounds like you are doing the right thing.

Also they do not eat as much at this age so I would just put less on his tray.

And teaching no in other situations will be helpful, too. Remember to also have patience. I know it is hard when you have a great mess to clean up, but that will soon pass and you will miss the days of him being a baby.

I agree with the others that say to take the food away from them. Putting food in timeout was effective with my son, but only somewhat with my daughter. We had to resort to removing her away from the table. We really didn't see an issue with it untill we took our twins out to eat right after they started the phase and our entire table floor was covered in their food. The dog apparently had been eating quite a bit of food. Although it's cute, that smirk will only get worse the closer they get to 2. Nip it in the bud NOW, or you will loose complete control in a few months. Although no one can avoid the 2s or 3s, Setting the boundaries now will make it alot easier and more manageable. I'm so glad that my husband and I stuck to out guns, it's paid off in quite a bit of instances. Good Luck.

I have 3 kids: 8,4 and 1. All three of them have thrown food at that age. My youngest is 16 months and he is doing the same as your child. This is the age where they are exploring with new things that they are just learning and this is the time when they understand words you say,like NO. Your son is learning that he can push your buttons and he wants to see how far he can go. I hope this helps your situation! I wouldn't get concered because this is a phase he is going through.

S. L. Mother of three