Terrible Two's Already?

Updated on July 26, 2007
J.M. asks from Irwin, PA
5 answers

My 19month old son is starting to behave awful! If I take something off of him or tell him "no" he will pick up the closest thing and throw it, and if that wasn't satisfying enough he will pick up something else and throw it, and if he is really mad he will run up to me and pinch or hit me! Is this terrible twos already? How do I get him to stop? How do I make him understand that throwing things and hitting mommy is not a good way to handle his anger? Help please!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.N.

answers from Benton Harbor on

Hi J.~
Sounds like your little guy is looking for a reaction. He is at the age where he is learning that he has an identity and can think for himself. Now it's your turn to teach him how to make the right choices. What worked for us was to get down on his level, look in his eyes, grab his hand and give it a squeeze (not hard, but enough to make him look) and give him a firm 'no'. Then turn away from him and go back to what you were doing so he doesn't see your continued interest as a 'dare' to do it again. Once he has stopped the behavior, then praise and cuddle him to reward the good behavior choice. We only used 'no' for behavior that MUST change, not for everyday things that I didn't want him to play with...for that we just redirected his attention. This worked like a charm. It only took a couple of times before he understood that the praise was WAY better than the discipline. Our son is 3 now and when we say 'no' he still knows that we are serious, and he knows how to correct his behavior and to ask nicely to get what he wants. It was a small step that has reaped great rewards! Good luck!

Congrats on the wedding...try to relax. When it's all said and done, the little things won't matter!!
~L.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.W.

answers from Jackson on

Helping them have words to describe their feelings help my boys. We use sign language the sign for angry is passing your hand over your face and closing it into a fist.

We also encourage them to do non destructive things with their angry energy. Boys are SOOOO Physical. I taught them how to do an Angry dance (you can probably figure out how to do that one)

If none of these help we have a comfort corner. It's not time out perse because they aren't sitting there for punishment they are sitting there to get control of themselves and calm down. We have a bean bag chair, a basket of books, a favorite blanket, and I make sure they have a cup of milk or juice. The first few times we used it I sat with them cuddling (or bear hugging to keep from getting hit/head butted!) Now they will sit and calm themselves down.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.C.

answers from Detroit on

Hi J.,

My son is 23 months and we have been going through the same thing for several months now also. We have been consistant with time outs and discipline and I am seeing a huge decrease in how often he is exhibiting this behavior. There is light at the end of the tunnel!! Just keep in mind that each behavior you overcome there is another new one right behind it. Yesterday was the first time my son grabbed something and held it to him saying "mine" when he thought another child was going to take it. Welcome to a new phase....LOL.

Good luck and remember you are not alone!!

T.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.A.

answers from Detroit on

Unfortunately, it does sound like the terrible twos! My daughter turned two in June, but we have been dealing with this since she was 18 months old. Lacy has GREAT ideas about discipline, and after reading this, I am planning on using those methods myself! We also read Karen Katz's book, "No Biting!" which goes through a series of simple commands such as "No biting your friends. What can you bite?" Then your child lifts the flap and sees the picture of the kids eating apples and you read, "Apples!" The book deals with throwing, hitting, biting, spitting, and pushing. So in an attempt to distract my 2yo from doing any of those things, I say sternly, "No hitting! What can you hit?" The answer the book gives is a drum, but my daughter always gets it wrong and says, "Apples!" Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.W.

answers from Detroit on

Hey there! This is totally normal! Hard to deal with but normal...He is just frustrated and doesn't know how else to express it. I have a son who is 23 months and I found it helped to explain his emotions and show him better ways to express them and deal with them. Example: He gets mad because I take a toy away because he is hitting the dogs with it. He gets mad and hits me. I say I know your mad Mommy took the toy away, but we don't hit. Then I will offer him an alternative activity/toy until he forgets about the original toy I took away. Or, if he is not too heated over the situation, I might show him how to use the toy the right way. He won't get it on t he first try or maybe even on the 20th, but you need to keep helping him understand and handle his emotions.
Hang in there! It does get better!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches