I have a 2 1/2 yr old son that is full blown terrible two's. He throws frequent tantrums just about anytime he doesn't get what he wants when he wants it. I also have son that will be 1 next month. My older son will throw a fit when they baby plays with a toy that he doesn't want him to. Sometimes it goes as far as him hitting the baby to get his toy back. I've also caught him pushing the baby down when he has pulled himself up, trying to pick up the baby or pull him down even just walk on him when the baby is in his way. I don't like the idea of hitting him as punishment. We use a 1-2-3 count and time-outs but they just don't seem to be working anymore. He seems to do ok at daycare, occasionally there will be a note sent home that he was being too rough with the other kids but mostly good reports.
Oh yeah, welcome to the terrible two's! I know the 1-2-3 counting and it's very effective. Stay true to what your doing and just weather it out. Oh, and just wait till little brother is old enough to hold his own!
Two's are definetly a hard time, whatever punishment you decide to do make sure you are consistent all the time. You cannot give a time out one time and the next let it slide, believe me if you do your son will notice and act worse. Just be sure he understands that pushing his brother down is not acceptable and each time he does it he will be punished.
A.,
My duaghter will be 3 on A. 17. I have just been through what I call a small civil war. My girl is an oly child, so things are diffrent there. The only thing is she takes her aggression out on me. She has her good momments, but they are few and far between. She has spendt most of her 2's in the naughty chair. I have counted, talked, and did things the Nanny siad to do.
I have just come to the conclusion we have to just wait and they will outgrow it sooner or later.
Good luck.
I know EXACTLY what you are going through! My son is 2 1/2 years old and my daughter is 8 months old. He does the same things as you are describing, pushing her down, taking toys away from her, even when they are her own toys! It can definitely be very frustrating!! All I can say is to continue to do what you have been. Something else we have done is if he continues to take toys away from her, then we take the toys from him. They are taken away for a period of time and he cannot play with them. Sometimes works sometimes doesn't.
Basically all I can say is just stick to your guns and keep a close eye on them when they are together.
Even though my son tries to pick her up, push her down, and just basically annoy her, he still has his moments when he gives her a hug or kiss or even plays WITH her. It just takes time. Good luck!!
A., There is a reason why they call it the terrible two's! Here's my advice: At his age, he still wants (and demands) a lot of attention. But if you are working full time, and then coming home to a one year old, my guess is that the baby requires much more of your time. (Diapering, feeding, dressing, ect.) This is understandable. But try making a concentrated effort to show your "TT" a lot of extra POSITIVE attention when you get home. If you don't make a point of it, you will find yourself reacting to his "acting out" and giving NEGATIVE attention to him all evening. This gives him reinforcement to his acting out, AND leaves you frustrated with him. Try giving him your first attention when you see him, then throughout the evening find times to say good things to him, and give him extra hugs and smiles. I believe you will begin to find him responding better. Get him to "help" you with the baby.(you probably did that in the very beginning) and call his attention to the things he can do that the baby can't like: "Eric,I have to dress Aiden now because he can't dress himself yet. I rember when YOU couldn't dress yourself either, but look at you now! You can do a lot of things that Aiden can't do yet! Would you help me and go get a shirt for Aiden to wear? Thank you! You are a good big brother! Aiden is lucky to have a big brother that helps him like you." Make a special point of praising him when he is nice to the baby. Like when he touches him gently. I hope this is helpful!
Hi A.- My children are similarly spaced and we have had a degree of this in our house-- here's what we've done:
Never give the hitter attention- Negative attention is still attention- tell him "we do not hit (push, pull hair...)"- then shower the victim with attention. Don't hit the hitter- it reinforces his behavior.
We've been working on identifying feelings - get Eric to point out people who are happy, sad, frustrated,mad, excited. Then after the situation is diffused, say Eric, why did you push Aiden?
He had my truck
How do you think that made Aiden feel?
Sad
What could we do instead?
Hit him
What else could we do?...he may need some help at first but after a while hopefully he'll be able to solve his own problems This technique is from a book called THINKING PARENT THINKING CHILD -- it's a really great approach but it takes a little time and patience. I have to go -- my own children are bickering.. good luck --S.
