Teenage Discipline Needed for ADHD Teen

I HIGHLY recommend taking Love and Logic classes. Here are the list of classes the local Love and Logic instructor is teaching: http://www.keriparentcoach.com/447486.html Tell her T. sent you. You can also call the Love and Logic company at 800-588-5644 to get the contact info for people who teach classes in your area (I just called and a real person answered right away and was very helpful).

It is better to learn when the consequences for defying authority are relatively small.
The Love and Logic approach is all about tough love--being firm and consistent in letting children suffer the natural (logical) consequences of their actions, while doing so in a very gentle and loving way, having true empathy in your heart. My mom parented this way, and I really appreciate my upbringing. I feel she was a very effective and loving parent who helped prepare us for the real world.

If classes aren't available near you, check out some Love and Logic materials at the local library for free or buy them at www.loveandlogic.com. Here are some I recommend: a seminar on DVD "Painless Parenting for the Preschool Years," the book "Parenting with Love and Logic." They also have some great CDs full of wonderful advice and real-life applications that you can listen to in the car while driving.

Hang in there. I did not read your entire entry before I wanted to repy. go to www.parentingtodaysteens.org and check out the very helpful advice. Mark Gregston is a teen counselor with alot of helpful info. I am usually in tears most times I hear his spot on KFLR 90.3 and when I listen online. We are in Family counseling for my teen and It really seems to help to have a outsider see inside. Also I am currently reading Crucial Conversations, Tools for talking when stakes are high by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan and Switzler. God is very present and the book of James states that If anyone lacks wisdom Just ask God and he will answer. God has given me wisdom many accounts--sometimes doing what is right is very painful and difficult.

D.-

I don't have a teenager, but I taught in a middle school, so know the challenge teenagers can present. Look around on this website: http://www.loveandlogic.com/ . I believe that this parenting and teaching philosophy is very effective. Good luck!

I feel your pain, I have a fifteen year old and she was acting up. We took everything away from her. All her cool cloths and bought her polo shirts and kaki pants to wear to school. She had to earn them back. Lay down the rules. do not waver. Give them the consequences first. Example: If you talk to me like that, no computer, phone and wii for 2 weeks. do it! do not give in at all. Explain to him what happens is his choice. If he acts up and wants to go some place say you have a choice you can stay home or you can act accordingly and i will take you. But it is his choice with cloths also. You want to wear that you have a choice stay home and wear that or change and you can go. abide by that. Do not waver in the dicipline. Also a little counceling might work to find out why his feelings are so negative with you

This is a difficult time for him and you. He is striving to become adult. He learns how to do that by watching adults. When he sees adults being respectful, he learns how to be, etc. At the same time, he is striving towards independence. Look at how you can give him opportunities to be successful in acheiving adulthood and independence and foster those. Offer him choices, acceptable choices, in everything. Really listen to him, asking him what he needs/wants. He is looking for loving guidance, too. While you are the parent and need to provide guidance for him, some times it is easy as parents to fall into the role of dictating. Always check into where your intentions come from....loving guidance, or enforced obedience? The Golden Rule really works, treat him as you want to be treated. Blessings to you.