Teen Shyness

I don't have an answer for that. All I know is when I took drama, and effective speaking in high school, it cured my shyness. It gives you the confidence you need to face the unknown. Even adults get nervous when they are around total strangers, and it must be terrifying for teens.

I loved Pat's idea about taking drama at school........if your son will do it. You may also find a class away from school so that he is not with his peers.....may be less threatening.

All in all, lots of people are shy. Usually they are just born that way. Time will help. He has friends at school so I wouldn't worry.

Let him have a gathering on his "turf" at home. He could invite some people he knows and some he doesn't. Being at home may make him feel more comfortable.

Is he unhappy with his current friendships, or his social life. Is it possible that he at 17 is trying to stay out of social circles that are doing things he just doesn't want to get into. He may be that wonderful kid who doesn't want to get into the teen cycle or drinking, sex, etc. which is good judgment in my opinion. If your son is happy and just shy then I would let him go. If you think he has social anxiety which is completely different then I would consider getting him into therapy. But, trust me there is a difference. If he is happy and just not as social as you would like him to be then I would leave him be. Trust me I lived through the teen years there is a lot going on our there, he is the one who is exposed to it in school and that may be enough for him. I wouldn't push him and let him go at his own pace. I am an extremely social and outgoing person and my husband is not with new people. I am the person who will talk to the people in the elevator and my husband will see someone he knew from high school and not be assertive enough to greet them. We are all different. My kids would always say to me "Mom why do you talk to everyone" LOL!! Like I said unless he is completely anxious about being social then I would let him be. Teenagers are not always forthcoming with things we want them to do, they have to do them at their pace and when they feel they want to. The only thing I would insist on is that he is respectful when he meets someone new, but I would not push him in those situations. Good luck!!

What county do you live in? Montgomery County has a wonderful (Free) program that I have some involvement with. Let me know. If it's not MoCo, I may be able to find an equivalent program in another county.

Google social anxiety disorder and see if he has any of the symptoms. My daughter was always shy but had a small group of friends in highschool. Starting college really set her back. She has been diagnosed with Social anxiety disorder and is in therapy. To deal with her aniety she started cutting herself. She has been in the hospital twice this year already. We thought she was just a very shy child. She always seemed pretty happy at home. If only we would have known and had gotten her help sooner. I don't mean to scare you but I don't anyone else to go through what we are doing. It has turned my family upside down and we are told she has a very long road ahead of her. Best of luck to you.

Are you involved with any local churches? A youth pastor would love to work with him and also would introduce him to good kids. Youth pastors live to help struggling teens, and there would be no cost. Some youth groups are absolutely amazing. I wouldn't push counseling on him unless you see signs of depression or anger issues.
If he has a nice group of friends, I wouldn't worry too much. Just get to know his friends, and with maturity, he will come out of his shell,