I"m planning on googling but thought i would try here first. I"m looking for ideas for teaching 6 yo girls to be nice to each other.
One thing i've seen done is to take a tube of toothpaste and have them squeeze isome out and then direct them to put the toothpaste back in the tube, which is basically impossible, much lilke taking back mean words once they leave our lips. you can say sorry but it doesn't take back those words.
anyone else have any cute little demonstrations like that about being kind???
A spin off but even better i think, TAke a piece of paper and make a paper doll...then have the girls sit in a circle. hold up the smooth paper doll and w/o saying a word make a mean face and crumple just a small portion of the doll. pass the doll around and encourage each girl to take a turn "crumpling" the doll. when everyone has a chance t hurt the doll in some way and it gets back to you, smooth it out, tape it if it gets ripped then explain to the girls that everytime they are mean (saying you can't play, you aren't my friend etc...) they "crumple" each other and even if you try to smooth it out, that person is never the same again, can never be smooth again. we need to be so careful not to crumple each other. then we talk about ways we can try to make it up to our friends when we forget and crumple our friends...I hang the doll up and keep it up all year...it is cute to hear the kiddos say "you are crumpling me" or "I'm sorry I crumpled you, how can I help you feel better?" believe it or not it is very powerful!
I googled and there is a Teaching Tolerance.org that has a few ideas,
Thanks everyone for your help and for the great example you have for your girls.
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Cut a heart out of paper, crumple it up (the crumpling represents nasty names, bullying, crude remarks). Even though you can ALMOST flatten the heart out to look like it did before, it's a very visual representation that nastiness leaves lasting damage that cannot be undone.
I like a story I read on facebook about a man teaching his son loosing his temper....
Every time he lost his temper, he had to go hammer a nail into a fence...... over time, he put in fewer and fewer nails. Then, his dad had him PULL the nail out each time he said something nice, or helped someone (or something like that.. I don't remember the full story...)
Anyway, as time went on, he eventually pulled all the nails out of the fence... dad and son went out to look at the fence, and all of the growth he had accomplished... but... as the father then pointed out... no matter how sorry you were for saying things, or loosing your temper, you can never take back what you said or did.... look at all the nail holes in the fence... those scars are there forever.....
Well... I had two boys for awhile that did nothing but fight... so I tied them together. Above the knee, waist, and arms at the elbow. They had to do everything together, and helping each other. They stayed tied together until they had been cooperating and respecting each other for a time. They didn't have to be NICE, but they did need to show the other respect. Or whatever they were trying to do flat out didn't work.
The paper thing wouldn't have worked... they WANTED to be hurting each other.
That's really sweet-and so is the paper doll idea. I once took my five, fighting children to my brother's grave and asked them what they thought I would give to have him back-the next 45 minutes was one of the nicest times of my life.
Nothing teaches like direct experience. I don't intend to sound or be mean but pick out one thing on each girl. Blonde hair, freckles or big feet and say something unkind but not necessarilly mean about it. Explain to them that you don't mean to be unkind but it's an example.
for instance: blondes are so dumb --- or wow with those feet you won't have to buy skis
It's not a totally unkind thing to say but it demonstrated how you can not take back hurtful words and EVERYONE has something. Jackie Kennedy wore a size 10 shoe and yet was considered a beautiful woman. Oprah is a very accomplished woman and beautiful but spent many years overweight and suffered from fat jokes.
You could take an inexpensive glass vase and break it. Tell the girls even if you glue it back together --it's still broken and has cracks.
Ring a bell -- you can't un-ring a bell.
Way back when I was 13 I had a nun tell me I was too stupid to go to college. I am dyslexic in math and I simply can not get algebra it just makes no sense to me. However my IQ is in the near genuis range. Every time I think about going back to finish my degree I hear those words **you are too stupid for college**.
Yep, One and Done's example below.
My kids, learned that in school too.
OneAndDone - I love this idea. It can be taken a step further too and as the paper gets crumpled again and again it gets worn with holes in it and tears.
I'm going to try this with my daughter and son. My daughter (6) can be too mean to her little brother (3).
Thanks for posting this question. I hadn't considered it before. I'll keep the heart on the fridge as a visual reminder too.
I got nuthin - but thanks for the question!!!! (and of course the answers..) :)
