I can feel ya... My daughter is 8/29/01 and WAS the youngest in her class and was getting reports just like your getting. She was doing fine academically but the kids who were a year older were kicking her butt academcially and socially. She was the shortest, youngest, etc... It was like this in all the sports she played too. She was ALWAYS compared to kids a year older which is NOT FAIR.
Things were like this academically,emotionally,socially
Kindergarten-Good,some problems
1st Grade-Ok, more problems
2nd Grade-lost alot of friends, bad, horrible
My daughter never qualified for special services like title one or anything but her grades were the pits in 2nd grade. Noone would play with her hardly, she wasn't invited to birthday partys it just went down the tubes and I swear it's cause she was the YOUNGEST. She's bright she reads at a 4th grade reading level she's only 7.
So a few months ago this past January I had enough of seeing my beautiful, friendly, outgoing, bright, smart daughter struggling with her peers and always being one step behind the older kids and I yanked her out of public school(public schools don't let you hold your kid back unless they feel the need) and I enrolled in her a private school and put her back into 1st grade. She is so happy, back her to old self, has a ton of friends and doing just absolutely great. She's the same size as these kids, same maturity, has the same abilities and isn't being compared to kids a year older anymore.Best decision I have EVER made. Sure I was hesitant, my family told me not to but in my heart I had to. By switching school's noone really knows, the kids are still super young and accepting. My daughter loves this change as well.
My daughter is very mature especially around adults, she's not shy can hold a conversation with any adult. So of course my family and other adults think I was crazy to hold her back but there is a difference between being around adults and being around her peers. There is a huge difference between kids. The other girls at school were alwyas 10 feet ahead of my daughter in interets, maturity, you name it.
As much as you want to blame the teacher for not giving you what you want to hear she's probaly right about your daughter. Noone wants to ever hear anything negative about their child, trust me I've heard tons. But she's a teacher so listen to what she is saying. When my daughter was in preschool they told me DONOT send her to kindergarten and I thought the teacher was nuts and that I know my daughter better than anyone and by gosh she's ready for kindergarten and now I want to slap myself for not listening to that teacher who I thought was just picking on my daughter or didn't know her like I did.
My advise is hold her back if it's already this stressful and your already having issues. It will get harder each year she continues if you don't. Do you want a child who is one step under everyone and always catching up? Or do you want a child who confident and doesn't have to work as hard?
Here is some examples of what I'm talking about:
Kindergarten my daughter was reading at grade level, really small books and doing sight words. The Cat ran to the door. Stuff like that. NOW the older girls who were a year older some of them were reading freaking chapter books. Now my daughter wasn't behind she was at grade level but 'cmon that big of a difference in the classroom is nuts.
1st grade again my daughter was at grade level when the school year started. These other girls were literally 25 reading levels higher than my daughter and it drove my daughter nuts. She was so jealous and hated these girls. These girls got special privelages and got to read the fun books etc.Those girls were teachers pets etc. My daughter didn't have a chance. It took my daughter an entire YEAR to get to where the other girls started at. So by the end of 1st grade my daughter was where those girls started 1st grade at. Now my daughter was slightly above grade level. But those girls were now way way way past her they got even farther ahead. With summer school and mom pushing her at home I got her farther.
So my daughter started 2nd grade above grade level but those girls were like in outer space I swear. Then my daughter was a 4th grade reading level by mid 2nd grade and still nowhere near these girls abilities and never would be at this rate. I won't even get into math or science.
Sorry this is so long I just really struggled with this myself and want to let you know we went from hating school, pushing my daughter to now relaxing, enjoying school and being a kid again.