Swearing Around Children

Reminds me of my grandmother's neighbor who had a cat called "bustintheass"! LOL

No--not appropriate--but what can you do?

I giggled when i heard the cats name, but yeah, i wouldnt do that. I admit i slip up and cuss in front of my kids but i apologize, and they know its wrong so they dont do it.

Not okay...is she for real with that name? I have to admit that I read the cats name twice and laughed BOTH times.

Well, this will ruffle feathers...swearing around children is trashy and immature. We say they can't, but we do? What ever happened to parents actually setting an example? I don't consider swearing "adult." I consider it pointless. There is no age appropriate for swearing, really. People who swear constantly come across as unintelligent, immature, and lacking in class. ESPECIALLY, people who swear in front of their children, like it doesn't matter.

I wonder when people will grow up and realize, words are NOT just words. They never have been and never will be.

Wow, tasteless and YES classless. It's kind of a self-fulfilling thing; you are what you show the world. Let's be frank, swearing is crass, rough and uncouth. If you can't express yourself without foul language, you're not going to get very far in life, IMO. I'm no prude and let a good F word fly when I'm angry and alone, but I dropped that language in the home when our daughter was born. There is nothing more offensive to me than hearing swear words come out of the mouth of a babe. Just my opinion.

I think that's appalling. Children should be raised with respect and with the understanding of respect. Whenever I hear families talk like that when I am out, I automatically think they are uneducated and low class, and ultimately, I feel sorry for the kids. I don't believe it gives kids the right foundation for a successful future. JMO.

that's aweful!
I slip up every now and then but my kids also know they aren't allowed to repeat those words.
Constant swearing makes you sound unintelligent and classless. Like you don't know another word you could use.
naming the cat that encourages them to do it.
If they are around you, I'd sit um down and tell um how it makes them sound not smart." you guys are smart kids right? "" well why would you want to say things that make you sound not smart" and ask them to see if they could use their imagination and think up another word for the bad one. like " oh farfignugan" or " son of a biscuit eater" etc

wow. maturity check. I thought after reading the first sentence you were going to say she's a twenty something college brat, but 3 kids! and of that age? Geez louise. Im 30 with 2 kids ages 3 & 1, and every once in awhile I'll left and f bomb slip ( stubbing my toe, stepping on a toy car, etc. ) and i immediately pray they didnt hear me.

Sounds like she needs a wake up call about what she is presenting to her kids on a daily basis as far as language and behavior. I know some people grow up with parents who swear and turn out just fine, but I don't think I've ever heard of people growing up with things being named inappropriately.

Hilarious name, not appropriate for a home with kids. While I agree with Michelle R about us making them "bad" words, reality is reality, and these kids have to live in our society we have created. In our society, people are expected to act and talk a certain way out of respect for others. I suspect these children will grow up finding that difficult to do.

No class whatsoever.

My xSF's friend named his dog S***head. Poor thing. They called it S*** for short.

I think that occasional swearing around kids is alright. We all slip and frankly sometimes that's JUST the word at that time. DH and I try to say something else for those times you just need to yell, even just "bad word!!" works.

My stepson is in college now and when he comes home we remind him, "Small ears, big mouth" and after about a day he remembers to rein it in.

I think it's sad that her kids are swearing, but they are only imitating what they know and have approved at home. They may have some run-ins with society (schools, daycares, friend's parents) if they don't learn to rein in their language. I think it's disrespectful to her kids and teaching them to be disrespectful to others. A major parental failing. Were it my SIL, I might also limit the amount of time she and/or her kids are around my kid if they couldn't filter their language. Does your brother/BIL just not care?

.

My parents also swore in front of me and then sent me to a military prep school for the summers... Uh, yes, I was fluent in more languages than they test freshman year of college! Now flash forward... It is a curse. In the professional setting, people who watch their language are more respected. Those who think otherwise most likely curse and probably don't realize the impact. I didn't. Also, it is a stinking hard habit to break. Secondly, although I THOUGHT I was very grown up to use those words, it does not indicate maturity or intelligence. Yes, I know you can't tell someone's education, IQ, or social status by listening to them, but you CAN tell their level of self control which is a strong element of character (which is really what people use the others to gauge anyway!) Dont know what influence you can have in this situation. Just my experience/ opinion.

I have to say I really laughed when I read this! But come on...She cannot name the cat that. Yes, many times people slip and swear in front of their kids, but naming your pet a swear word means they'll be using the word every single day...many times a day. People will come to their house, ask the parents or the kids what the cat's name is and they'll have to respond, "The cat's name is Sh!tballs." Okay, I'm laughing again as I type this!!! But seriously, it's crazy, stupid and immature!!!

I swear in front of mine all the time and always have... They know/knew THEY are not allowed to say them because they are "grown up" words.

They are just words... WE are the ones that make them bad by saying they are bad. There are lots of other words that I think are vulgar but are not considered curse words.

ETA

I totally resent the implication that I or anyone else that swears is low class, uneducated or unintelligent. You CAN NOT know what my IQ is based on what words I choose to use. Nor can you tell what words are in my vocabulary. As someone else said it was part of my upbringing that comes back. Every other word out of my mouth is not a curse word, but it sure does come out when I am angry.

I have taught them, as I was taught, there is a time and a place for everything.

I think it is appalling, I curse...but not in front of my children and I would never name my pet a swear word...maybe back before kids and in college it would be funny BUT....I think it is inappropriate, we need to set examples for our kids.

My parents cursed in front of me and my two brothers constantly when we were growing up. They never put a sensor on their mouths. My grandmother also swore around me growing up. However, my parents never let us curse. We werent even allowed to say 'sucks' without getting punished for it. So, we never said cursed. BUT, now that me and my brothers are all grown we swear all the time. I often say curse words without even realizing Im saying them. My husband on the other hand.. his family never cursed in front of him, and never does so now as an adult. I do wish my parents censored their mouths a bit more. Maybe then I wouldnt have such a hard time censoring my mouth around my little one. I do try my best, and I think Im doing a pretty good job at it.

I swore in front of my daughter and she learned to do it. I just made sure that she knew the meanings of the words, how to use them in correct context, and when to use and not to use them.

Hi J.,

I think your sister is wrong. She really shouldn't be swearing in front of her kids. Every once in a while, my husband and I do slip up, but right after we tell our 6 year old not to repeat those words because they're not good words to use (and we'll be telling our 18 month old the same thing as he gets older). Good luck!

I don't swear around my kids. I had a friend that felt like it was ok because they were going to hear the words from someplace anyway, so why not hear it form their parent. And that was my point exactly. You don't talk like that in front of your kids and then say that they can't do it. My kids have no idea what swear words mean, and I figure when they hear it I'll be able to tell them that those are grown-up words that some people choose to say, but we don't talk like that.

Your SIL sounds like a dumbA$$ (lol)

While I think that is a terrible name for a pet in a family home (perhaps better suited for college roomates), I doubt there is much you can do about this. I swear occasionally/accidentally in front of my kids but I always stress after a slipup that I should have chosen better words and that kids should NEVER (and are not allowed to) use swear words. Yes, they are just words, but I think people in general sound much more mature/respectable when we refrain from swearing in everyday conversation. I would be mortified if learned that my kids were swearing in front of friends, teachers or other parents. It is all about values.

We cussed around our kids, but they never did. Naming a kitten shitballs is pretty stupid tho.

I swear like a sailor, my kids are not allowed to. They know this & adhere to it. I do try to curb my swearing a good bit when I'm home, but I'm half Irish & half Italian so my blood runs pretty hot & when I get worked up, well, there's really no stopping me. With that being said, I would not name an animal with a cuss word, though it is kind of funny, it's immature & since my kids aren't allowed to curse, they'd never be able to call the animal by it's name!

Well, I think it's a crummy name for a kitten, lol.

We don't censor our language around our kids. We've never had a real issue (outside of a few rare instances of mimicry) with our kids cursing. But I think that's partly due to our kids' innate personalities, and partly due to the fact that we don't actively encourage them to use curse words.

My husband works in Sewers/Construction and travels 5 days a week. He basically lives with the guys he works with during this time. He and they all have gutter mouths. Friday night when he gets home his mouth is awful and after me and the kids constant reminders by Sunday it usually has subsided (a bit). But back to work Monday and by Friday we start the whole routine over again.

Not sure if it is maturaity - but their surroundings. If thats all you around then its going to be apart of your vocabulary.

I have taught my kids that the words daddy uses are not ok for them and the definitely remind dad it is not ok to use. But when his environment is made up of every other word is a cuss word he gets sucked into it. This isn't an excuse, but just saying not sure I can blame maturaty 100%

Hope her kids can learn to avoid it tho.

all my family members curse like they are going to not be here tomorrow :) they always have. my mom and dad cursed like crazy. we weren't allowed to curse growing up. we could say piss and hell when we were little because they weren't viewed as bad words. my cousins say the f word and GD and everything in between. none of their kids curse. my husband doesn't do it and i do it occasionally. my daughter doesn't but my son will say "l'll beat your a$$ if you don't stop." he's 5. i think it's kinda tacky, and i cringe when some things are said in front of kids. but i'm not their parents, and i'm not going to criticize someone for that kind of thing. the kids are of an age where they are going to hear it from kids at school. my nephew said the f word after hearing it in afterschool care from the older kids. and my daughter would tell me all the time that she heard kids on the bus saying bad words.

oh, when i was in middle school, my brother had a pit bull named B!tch. when he told my mom he said "come here, B!tch." my mom thought he was talking to her!

WOW! Occassionally a a bad word will slip out in front of my kids, and they occassionally have used that same bad word in the correct context. Bad on me. I'm not a bad mom because of it though. But I absolutely would NOT name my animal a name with a curse word in it. To each their own I guess!

Honestly, it makes me mad. I am no prude and have been known to swear. But, like anything there is a time and a place. She is being or portraying herself to be an irresponsible, immature, low-class person and her kids will grow up the same. Apples don't fall from trees. We all sit around wondering how/why kids are the way they are today, but the truth is just about everything stems from the child's upbringing. Everything is too lax, too instant gratification, too entitled, too reality t.v.

My parents never swore. EVER. And we still knew every bad word in the book (even though we didn't know what any of them meant) in elementary school.
I have a trucker mouth. I fully admit it. We cuss in front of our kids, but they don't use those words, because they aren't allowed to. I tell them those are grown up words, and they can use them when they are grown up. I also drink in front of my children, but they don't expect me to allow them to sit down with a beer, because they also know those are grown up drinks, and they can have them when they are grown up. Come to think of it, I also drive a car in front of them, but they don't try and drive. Again, they can do it when they are old enough. It's all about teaching your children what your expectations are, and yes, those expectations differ depending on your age.
I will say, that although that might be a funny (OK - hilarious) name for a cat, it's not appropriate with children. Because at that point you are making cussing something they have to do, not something they aren't supposed to do.

I think that is awful, but she must not mind her kids swearing at her, because that will happen. Even Shut up, sucks, stupid, etc. are bad words in my house. When the kids hear it on tv or in a play yard, they know it's a word that we do not say.

Probably not much you can do for her, but just let your kids know where things stand in your house.

As I do not appriciate anyone curing near my kids, but it is everywhere, and unless I put them in a bubble they will hear it. It is my job to teach them what is appropriate and what is not. We can tear up other parenting styles left and right. Bed times, Diets, Sport participation, TV Time, Video games, Family time. etc etc. No 2 parents are alike. We can only affect our household and that is it.

I wonder if people picture themselves walking down the street screaming &^%$&*&(&%^ come home, or placing flyers on every telephone pole Lost Kitty named ^&**^%$$## please call ###-###-#### Really NO. I once dated a man who wanted me to name my dog "AskHer", funny yes what is your dogs name "AskHer" really what is it.... But 6am screaming askher to come home is not my idea of a practical name.

You can't control what she says in her house, but you can let her know that you won't tolerate that kind of language around *your* children, whether those words are coming from her mouth or her kids' mouths. You are absolutely within your rights to ask her to refrain from using that kind of language around your child. And if she ignores your request, well, then I would limit my contact with her.

ETA: She's violating the facebook terms of service by allowing a child under the age of 13 to have an account. I'd report that. Facebook has rules for a reason.

Is she sort of low class? I swear-never around my kids.

Hello, I think that is just odd and very imature.
K. K.

I literally laughed out loud when I read it. It is a ridiculously hilarious name... If you are single and living with your boyfriend. When you have kids? No.

Wow...it's one thing to swear around your children but this is ane xtremely odd case of encouraging your children to swear by naming a sweet pet a swear word. This is more of a class and maturity issue and glad you have far more of both to realize this. I haven't a clue as to how you even respond to this other than I would keep my distance just because I wouldn't even want to be around a person like that....Sorry to sound harsh but this is as strange as you think it is...funny how we can choose our friends but are "blessed" with family...you should still have the right to avoid people that share less parental responsiblity than you for the sake of yourself and your family...

Good luck and I think that if asked, you should be honest about your thoughts on this.

You will not like it when you hear your children start using language you don't
like. They will and it will be part of their vocabulary and deep in their brains.
You want them to like your SIL and her chldren and be part of her life so you will be part of all of this. You can't win, but you can tell them not to use
this language around you and this will help them sort it our.

To each his own about the swearing... at least her kids are "kinda" older... except the 7 y/o. Yikes.

My husband grew up with a cat they called Ellis. But really his name was "L.S." which stood for Little Sh*t. I thought that was funny, I don't know how old he was when he found out the real meaning of the name.

We have a cat, named PK, that pre-kids we nicknamed Little Poop for when he did little mischievous things. And when he did something really bad, we called him Little F**k Face. We do have two little boys now (3.5 & 15 mos) and needless to say, we don't use these little nicknames in front of them.

If people want to cuss in their own home, so be it. I am not a fan of it, but it's there house then can do what they wish. What I have a problem with is people who cuss out in public just for anyone to hear even children. Have some consideration, and some common sense to know that not everyone wants to hear your potty mouth. It's no different than if I was to run around yelling racial slurs in public, there both offensive.There are better ways to get your point across then to cuss. When I hear people cussing I automatically think their dumb and uneducated even if their not. It's just the way I feel, and I can't help it.