Hi there L....saw your post on here and had to respond...sounds like you and I have a lot in common. I am the mother of 3. A 19 year old in the Navy, and stationed in Norfolk, VA. An 18 year old, in college in ATL. And an 17 year old, who is my last child at home. I have begun pondering what am I gonna do when he graduates and goes to college...He is currently a junior in high school and is a sports star, and already being recriuted for colleges, so I know the day will come. I also have had a bit of bad luck with my health. I was in a bad car accident in 2004, and had my neck broken in 3 places. It took 3 surgeries to put me back together, and almost a year of rehab to get the use of my arms back, and my balance was messed up, so at that time walking was a challenge. It is only by the grace of God that I am alive, and functioning as a normal person today. I am in pain most of the time, but everyday I am able to roll out of bed, I am thankful to be alive, sometimes I have to make myself focus on that, just to want to go on. Like you, I had always been active, lifting weights, working out, I showed horsed on the National Circuit for many years, rollerbladed with my kids, etc. My activities have been limited, but I stay busy. When I was in my halo, the only time anyone accused me of being an angel...LOL, I knew that I would have to find or acquire other skills to be employable, as I could not continue my previous career as a retail loss prevention manager. So I went to the local college, and became certifed in Microsoft. I am a single mom, and my ex has never paid me any support, so I had to be able to provide for my family, in spite of everything. I do understand the thought of not being able to work, but like me, you may need to change focus. There are positions that you would have a lot to offer, and would give you contact with others. Maybe an office job, that would not be stressful to your condition. You might not find anything that pays a whole lot, but it would keep you busy, and enable you to have contact with the public. I myself manage a title pawn company, and am able to sit and stand for short periods of time, so it is perfect for me. This is something I never ever would have imagined myself doing but, and I do not make near the money I am used to, but I have made it work somehow. I also noticed that you are married, and your husband works, so the money may not even be an issue for you, and I believe someone else reccomended volunteer work, that is a great thing to do, and you could do it during your husband's work hours, so it would not interfere with family time. I also understand, more than I want to, that back problems are hard to deal with on a daily basis, and the constant pain is enough to depress anyone, myself included. I had never been as depressed as I was after all my surgeries, and my orthapedic doctor suggested I consider taking antidepressants, as it was an accepted therapy for someone with pain issues, as I also found out I have a fast progressing form of degenerative bone disease in my spine, which I did not know I had, but contributed to my injuries in the accident. I took his advice, and have been on a mild antidepressant for over a year. Believe it or not it has helped. My life is very different from what I had envisioned, and I have had to accept that I have limitations, but I have made the effort to restructure my life, everyday there is something new to handle, but from the inside you have to believe in yourself, and have faith you can handle it. I too worry about what I will do when all my children are gone, but after the last 2 years, I know I will get through it. I hope that something I have said will be helpful to you, and may inspire you in some way, I wish you the best of luck in all you do!!
